Question regarding filing for divorce.

dday_throwaway3 · 2022-07-26T00:44:53+00:00

Don't move out before the divorce is final. If you move out before it's final, it's the worst mistake you can make. Here's why: http://forum.mensdivorce.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=81622

ThrowAwayAccount__0 · 2022-07-26T03:04:15+00:00

Don't move out.

Get an attorney to help you with the process.

You wouldn't just wing fixing your car or your electricity would you?

So stop winging legal matters with divorce.

Pay the 50o bucks, get some help, and then rest easy knowing you made smart decisions and don't just hope for the best.

I can tell you from experience, it never goes how you think it's going to go. You need a tight document that is signed now, and you need to stay in the house until it's all legally binding what will happen.

You're playing this like she's your friend. She'll fuck you sideways if given the chance; what do you think her friends and family are telling her? Regardless of what she wants to do, sitting back is letting the chaos in.

Stop being lazy and put in the work to protect yourself. Then sleep knowing you did your part.

CrazySanta7 · 2022-07-26T00:32:05+00:00

Why not have the attorney put it in the divorce decree if you both agree on it?

Gattsama · 2022-07-26T07:37:15+00:00

So I'll be a slightly different voice. Married 12 years, no kids. We have to sell the house, I don't really want it; she does want it but can't afford it. She won't qualify for either an assumption loan or refinance (hasn't worked in 12 years). Neither of us have the assets to buy the other out, and to much equity for either of us to walk away from.

I moved out in Oct and filed in Feb. I have a rental place I'm staying at (it's actually really nice). We need / must sell the house. Since we have no kids and there is no way not to ultimately sell, my moving out has really no impact on anything.

I am so much more mentally healthy outside of the relationship. I have court ordered temporary support (which is really high) but I still have more discretionary income and a better lifestyle then when together.

You don't need a drafting contract that you'll split it evenly. Outside of a few rare situations that's a communal asset. ALL communal assets and debts are 50/50.

You don't have to involve lawyers. IF you can agree to an uncontested divorce you can either research the law, split everything 50/50 and call it. Or go to mediation and have them help sort it out.

I 100% recommend having a lawyer on backup in case things go sideways (which in my case they did ^{_^).} You can also use them for questions like the above. To answer tour question, you can not claim no assets. Again all assets / debts created during the marriage need to be split 50/50: credit cards, cars, furniture, house, etc. She opened a credit card, didn't tell you and owes 50k? that's community debt and 50% yours. You have a 401k at work? that's a community asset and 50% hers (the part that was added during marriage at least).

You need to sit down and make a spread sheet of ALL assets, debts and expenses. Everything from the day you marry until the day you file (in most states) is up for grabs. IF you two can split things (50/50 is the min, but you can do unequal if you so choose), work out alimony (if any, she might not qualify or can wave it). Then that's it your done. Can have lawyer write it up, double check it's all legit and submit.

You still have your lawyer on backup in case things go crazy.

pegleg_legal · 2022-07-27T12:42:55+00:00

Post-decree house sales where one party becomes a tenant are almost invariably a colossal mess, even when the divorce is "amicable". Think very carefully about all the terms you'll need to have in there so there's nothing to dispute when it's time to list, time to show, time to close, time to split the money, time to deal with any post-sale problems.

Title	Question regarding filing for divorce.
Author	onwarddespite
Upvotes	1
Comments	8
Date	July 25, 2022 10:49 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/w82rpe/question_regarding_filing_for_divorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/question-regarding-filing-for-divorce.1124837 https://theredarchive.com/post/1124837

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