I've made a couple posts here and in deadbeadroms but I feel like I'm kind of at the tipping point.
Married 6 years (7 in November) together for 8 (9 in September). I'm 39 and she's 43. The last time we had sex will have been 2 years ago on our anniversary. Before that I can remember a total of 3 other times before that in the two years prior to the last time. The sex in the first year was great then fell off a cliff after we got engaged. No kids due to medical reasons.
I'm a gamer and nerd she hates it. She doesn't have a hobby, unless you count work and obsessing over travel plans. I like to travel but I'm more of a "let's go and see where the wind takes us once we get there " She feels my lack of interest in planning means I don't enjoy traveling. She feels like gaming is a waste of time and I think she gets jealous of my interest in it and other nerdy pursuits. She hates sci-fi/superhero movies because she has no imagination.
We grew up in very different homes, even though neither of our families communicated about anything. My Mom was not a housekeeper, hers was type A. Sometimes I'll set dishes on the counter but she gets mad because I didn't put them in the dishwasher. She once woke up at 6am on Saturday and started cleaning psychotically because "it has to be done!" Which also meant I had to get up too.
I sometimes wonder if I didn't portray my authentic self when we got together because I often feel like I'm just going along with what she wants. I wonder if it's some childhood attachment BS or something.
Anyway, not sure I can take it anymore. No sex leaves me feeling unfulfilled and not intimate on top of feeling like I'm not good enough because of the things I like doing/interested in. Sort of feels like I'm trapped/just getting by rather than truly living a fun-filled fulfilling life. Rant over.
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