I'm 23M, from a socially-conservative immigrant community in the US. Growing up, my parents heavily emphasized academics at the expense of everything else, with the expense that if I "studied hard and got a good job/house/car, girls would come to me". As a teenager, my resulting failure to develop social skills made me a repeated target for intimidation/threats, stalking, and mockery. As I eventually learned, my abusers were closeted (another unfortunate outcome of social conservatism) gay/bisexual men who, though posing initially as friends, were in fact obsessed with me and thought that by making me "docile" and "submissive", they could "change" my sexual orientation.

I broke free from this abuse at the age of 19, and began to approach women. But here, my weak social skills, low self-confidence, and unkempt physical appearance encouraged many to push me around, and (in a cruel irony, given what I'd gone through) even use the language of "sexual harassment"/"creepiness" to seek attention at my expense. As was later admitted to me, the goal was to make me life in fear, and it worked. After meeting kinder, more empathetic women, and a brief, unfortunate detour into redpill-type self-improvement, since 21 I've started going on dates (I've been offered sex/relationships, but at the time, lacked confidence/trust and feared I'd be again labeled a creep for going for it).

Unfortunately, COVID has slowed my progress significantly, and my move to a new country puts me in a dating pool without friends or long-running acquaintances. On paper I've got decent looks, confidence, intelligence, hobbies and interests, etc., and nobody on a first date would think I'm a virgin. But against this backdrop, a lack of physical experience may be a huge disappointment and possibly even a red flag. It's not something that I intend to wear on my sleeves or whine about, but I don't think fake-it-till-you-make-it is the best approach either: any partner will definitely be able to tell when they kiss, make out, or have sex. So what's the best way to broach the subject?