Hypothetical Question: "Statute of Limitations" for Cheating

spiraldinosaur · 2022-10-08T19:07:28+00:00

That's a whole wide open question and would depend on so many different factors. How did it happen? Why did it happen? What was happening at the time? What has happened since? Where is our relationship now?

But in all honesty if a relationship has survived 20 years and could be torn apart by something that happened 20 years ago, it probably should have fallen apart long before that anyway. if someone is willing to throw away 20 years worth of trust and connection over a single event that happened so long ago, then it sounds like it was already unstable.

the-aids-bregade · 2022-10-08T22:00:33+00:00

dump easy absolutely no negotiation

rafaman777 · 2022-10-09T00:15:09+00:00

How long is a piece of string? There is no answer or guideline and its up to personal preference.

A friend of mine married three small children under 7 years old. He's a big earner and would be classified as a high status male by RP community. He's an insurance director ex fighter plus was very successful with women before marriage. His wife who is a doctor cheated on him with a work colleague. She kicked him out of the house and said she was pregnant with this man's child. It turns out she wasn't. He took her back for the sake of his children's future. That was 4 years ago and they are still together as a family.

Another friend her husband was an ex navy guy and couldn't get used to normal life. He turned to alcohol and cared about nothing, not even his 2 young children. He crashed his car drink driving, tried to end his life many times and was openly cheating on her. She took him back all those times. Eventually she had enough and let him return to the Navy after 7 years of marriage and he moved out and the relationship ended. It was no big ordeal for both of them, they both wanted different things and finally accepted it. He has little to do with his children and lives in another state. She is head of a hospital pharmacy and very successful. She's everything the RP says she shouldn't be. She loved her family and stood by him. She never thought of hypergamy which is the RP supposed norm. She's in a new relationship.

Life isn't perfect and people have different values.

domitori3 · 2022-10-08T18:57:05+00:00

If you were the person cheated on, would you just let it go, or would you treat it the same as if you were cheated on yesterday?

Let it go. Otherwise it would amount to unprocessed trauma.

mikey_weasel · 2022-10-08T20:56:31+00:00

Its a bit of a challenge to judge the scenario as its a bit bare bones.

And you are offering some pretty black and white options.

I think most people would end up somewhere in the middle, tending towards "let it go".

Its been twenty years, hopefully for their own sake someone should of at least somewhat dealt with it and moved on, but with a bit of baggage from that (depending how the cheating went down). Like it might of been that their partner cheated on them on a work trip to Las Vegas, so if a new partner was going away for a trip to Las Vegas they might ask that partner to do some actions to reassure them (for example checking in more often).

fathergoose77 · 2022-10-10T21:32:35+00:00

Human relationships are more complex than that. It really depends on the situation, why it happened, how it happened, has it happened again since, who it happened with, and what it means to the relationship now.

If it’s like “oh it was your brother while you were away on a business trip”, that’s going to be a lot harder to get past compared to “it was a FWB I had when we just started dating and it wasn’t serious yet and I since cut off contact with that person”. The second one would suck, but I can probably get over it if the relationship is generally strong/healthy the rest of those 20 years.

Title	Hypothetical Question: "Statute of Limitations" for Cheating
Author	Danny-Ost
Upvotes	2
Comments	9
Date	October 8, 2022 6:08 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/xyzf4d/hypothetical_question_statute_of_limitations_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/hypothetical-question-statute-of-limitations-for.1134581 https://theredarchive.com/post/1134581

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