Just found this sub, so I hope it's ok to post this here, but I just wanted to offer a perspective for discussion that's been bothering me:

I'm a woman who's been fortunate to find success in her career, so I end up having a significantly higher income than a lot of men I meet. This isn't something that really concerns me. The way I see it, if we get married, my money becomes our money so it doesn't matter in the end as long as my partner can support himself and shares my financial values. However, what I discovered over and over again in the dating pool was that men themselves seemed to have more of an issue with it than I did.

What was most hurtful was when I would begin seriously dating someone only to discover they felt insecure and resentful about it further down the road. They didn't like their girlfriend picking up the tab for things. They felt stupid waiting for me at home while I worked long hours. They didn't want to play "second fiddle" to their girlfriend as they saw it and have my career be the one dictating our living situation. These things hurt their pride and made them feel emasculated.

I don't believe every man is like this. But isn't this how TRP would have men act? The brand of destructive masculinity TRP touts would have you believe that all these things ARE inherently emasculating and negative. Would they allow their girlfriend or wife to have a career that comes up against theirs or be the primary breadwinner in their household? My sense is no.

So what is the end result here? If that's the case, I'm effectively forced into giving up my lucrative career at my partner's behest, or only dating men who equally or more successful than I am who won't feel threatened by me. So wouldn't RP ideology force me into "hypergamy" on its own?