What does masculinity mean to you?

Personal_Dirt3089 · 2026-06-18T19:21:46+00:00

manosphere and masculinity are not the same thing. Manosphere is a bunch of guys sitting around and whining about not getting women. That's not masculinity.

Manosphere figures are also performative AF.

Standard-Compote-275 · 2026-06-18T18:31:10+00:00

Im in the same boat as you. "Masculinity" is a broad and relative term based on the culture you're in. Just be a good responsible and confident person and you'll be fine.

xvszero · 2026-06-18T19:11:10+00:00

I don't think about it much. I'm not sure I ever did. I just knew I didn't fit in with most of the boys around me and then, as an adult, men. Eventually I started to understand why.

GoalDull4985 · 2026-06-18T18:35:03+00:00

Who exactly do men need protection from though? Other men?

Horrywaur · 2026-06-19T10:07:37+00:00

Masculinity = a noun referring to the qualities and associated qualities (or impression of such qualities) of men and maleness (distinguished from women and femaleness) both literally and symbolically

Instigated- · 2026-06-19T18:11:52+00:00

As a woman I don’t really think about masculinity.

If a person (male or female) feels like masculinity is part of their self identify and that is helpful for them in however they choose to define it for themselves, that is fine.

Perhaps trans people feel masculinity/femininity stronger than many others, as they feel something so strongly that doesn’t align to their birth body that they seek to transform the body to match how they feel.

Personally I think it wouldn’t have mattered much if I was born as a male or a female. The parts of me that feel particularly “female” are only so due to experiences I have had in life (in a sexist society, being treated like a girl/woman; and being a mother where your body grows and births and feeds a child and you bond with others who have a similar experience).

Even though I am a woman and a female I don’t tend to identify with “femininity” as a label because this seems to mean gender stereotypes. Usually if someone is trying to imply I or women should be “feminine”, they are pushing for things I don’t agree with (tradwives, subservience, docility). Things I would consider feminine include makeup, high heels, dresses, skirts, manicures, daintiness, etc.

I do identify as a mother and a feminist, which I guess both are technically feminine but I don’t usually think about it that way. I am not a very feminine woman, and perhaps sometimes people might consider the way I dress a bit more masculine or gender neutral.

However I am not going to judge a woman who does identify as feminine, who likes heels and makeup etc.

“Toxic” masculinity is a form of masculinity that IS a problem because it involves misogyny and a lot of damaging and harmful beliefs. Redpill kind of stuff.

But if a guy likes to do healthy stuff that is traditionally considered masculine (camping, hunting, fishing, sports, woodworking, building stuff, fixing stuff, beer, etc) there is no problem with that.

(These things can also be done by women)

ClashBandicootie · 2026-06-18T19:20:29+00:00

Yes, men deserve protection and care. They are humans, just like me. I didn't get to choose to exist in this hellhole--and neither did they.

Dizzy-Structure4498 · 2026-06-20T22:27:11+00:00

What else have you been uncovering since leaving the manosphere?

jumpingdiscs · 2026-06-18T21:51:08+00:00

I'm a woman and off the top of my head, here are some of the things I appreciate as "masculinity" in my husband, although they're human traits women can have too.

Competence and confidence in solving practical problems e.g. repairing things.
being physically bigger and stronger than me (i.e. reaching things and opening jarsl)
ability and desire to help people in emergency situations e.g. first aid skills - being a "protector" doesn't always mean conflict/fighting
being a good role model to our children, showing them that masculinity ≠ fighting and being disrespectful
being comfortable in his own skin e.g. being bald and not trying to hide it, not removing his body hair, etc. I'm so happy that this has set such a great example for our kids as my eldest child is now going through puberty and seems very body-positive, he's excited about growing body hair.
not being insecure about his masculinity - not trying to "prove" it through physically dominating others, showing off at the gym, etc, not hiding or avoiding traditionally feminine traits.

Extreme-Struggle3665 · 2026-06-18T19:55:46+00:00

i think about feminity like you where i should learn it without being weak and dumb because it's how it portrayed, i had this idea about reading about great women and how they were portrayed so i can build my version of femininity unfortunately there's few ressources, masculinity ressources are huge, about protection i think You protect your people that can't protect themselves against other men, that's how it portrayed

becomesharp · 2026-06-19T08:23:15+00:00

The definition depends on the context. Most of the time in coaching, we refer to the Masculine and the Feminine in terms of spirituality / eastern philosophy, with a little bit of jungian psychology relationship science mixed in.

From this perspective, the Masculine and the Feminine are two polar opposites or extremes, like north/south, or positive/negative, or 0 / 1. This is the essence of the yin and the yang in eastern philosophy.

Men and women generally have both polarities, though men tend to lean more towards the masculine, obviously, and women towards the feminine.

The masculine is represented by traits like logic, rationality, toughness, discipline, strength, leadership, and hardness.

The feminine is represented by traits or ideas like softness, emotion, empathy, nurturing, love, creativity, and cooperation.

Generally speaking, the sweet spot is almost always between the polarities in any given situation as extremes tend to be unhealthy or unproductive or both.

sirlost33 · 2026-06-18T21:09:52+00:00

To me masculinity is being true to yourself as penis carrying member of society without caring about outside social pressure. Do you, confidently. As a man define yourself, not what other people want to ascribe to you.

Title	What does masculinity mean to you?
Author	Flourescendrama
Upvotes	6
Comments	47
Date	June 18, 2026 6:02 PM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1u9dklt/what_does_masculinity_mean_to_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/what-does-masculinity-mean-to-you.1583099 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583099

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