How do I not get depressed from dumping an LVM?

Toomanyprollems · 2020-04-24T04:15:00+00:00

When I broke up with my ex I felt sad but also a huge weight lifted off of me. I ordered a bunch of FDS literature and am reading a ton of books and just generally having a good time without him since December. I've also been reading The Rules books by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. I have a ton of time to spend just doing whatever I want and also knowing that I am soley responsible for my own happiness has helped a lot instead of leaning on someone who isn't emotionally available.

AfraidofFollowers · 2020-04-24T05:53:58+00:00

Peanut m&ms helped me.

After 3 months, I still think about my ex every day. Sometimes you just got to do what is healthy for your soul and leave them in the dust.

There will always be more men. Toxic relationships should be avoided at all times.

cherrybombfield · 2020-04-24T05:10:02+00:00

I had a guy friend pursue me pretty hard and when I finally came around suddenly he didn't want a relationship ad was still in love with his ex. This was after talking almost everyday hours on the phone for months. It was weird. I tried to do the friend thing but at a point I realized it was not working for me. I felt manipulated bc I was basically his therapist and he didn't really act like a friend. He would flirt and then go silent on me from time to time. Every time I tried to set boundaries they just seemed to disappear. It was torture.

So recently I cut him off. He didn't take it great and thinks I am "having a fit". It sucks and I miss my friend but I don't miss being confused and feeling tricked. The more time that passes the better I feel. Once you get past the first part and break the habit of them it does get better and you start feeling stronger and thinking about things and realizing how much time and energy you wasted on them and that is where I am at now. I feel really dumb for having fallen for it, it was pretty much a scam and I should have known better. It will be okay. The sooner you do it the sooner you will be in a better place. I wish I had done it months ago instead of letting it drag on. I wasted too much time on someone who didn't give a crap about me and honestly who isn't even a good person.

girludontbringhome · 2020-04-24T03:34:21+00:00

If you’re not seeing or talking to him that much anyway, this break-up will not be as much of an L as you think it will be. I was in a similar situation months ago, I tried to actually break-up with my ex (in person) and he basically talked me out of doing it saying he will change. I think he was able to talk me out of it because I was afraid of getting depressed after the break-up and did not want to be heart broken. He did not change, and then he broke up with me over the phone right before Valentine’s Day and ghosted. Did that take a hit to my ego? A little, yes. But ultimately I did not miss him at all and it lifted a huge weight off of my shoulders because I knew he was not the right person for me. My life really improved when I stopped spending all those late nights waiting for him to call or text, waiting for last minute plans to be made, etc. And I literally felt better instantly the second I got off the phone with him. Two months ago was also a pretty low point in my life as well, I was being overworked on random shifts (literally alternating day and night shifts) with no weekends off, two of my close friends moved away, and I thought I would have to reapply to professional school at that point as well. The break-up still improved my life. So the takeaway is, you will not miss him that much because he is not really a big part of your life right now anyway. And he probably does not want a lukewarm relationship like this either so sooner or later he will probably end it himself.

savagecarebear2 · 2020-04-24T18:34:58+00:00

I recently went through a breakup and focusing on leveling up keeps me happy and occupied. I’ve been taking courses on edX, working out at home through videos, and scheduling video chats with my friends to help keep us all in good spirits. It has all helped tremendously because it helps me remember that I didn’t lose much of anything, he did. Plus, coming out of this relationship AND out of quarantine better than ever is great motivation 💪🏽

Kindly_Strain · 2020-04-24T07:41:10+00:00

You will feel better

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Title	How do I not get depressed from dumping an LVM?
Author	throw248348
Upvotes	31
Comments	10
Date	April 23, 2020 10:45 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/g6wpj6/how_do_i_not_get_depressed_from_dumping_an_lvm/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/how-do-i-not-get-depressed-from-dumping-an-lvm.692533 https://theredarchive.com/post/692533

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