How do you have a secret fund when married?

Sage_Planter · 2020-05-29T21:21:33+00:00

I don't necessarily think the funds have to be a huge secret. It's just absolutely crucial that a woman has a small account in the event she needs to run. Enough to cover a few months of living if shit hits the fan because all too often, men control all bank accounts and can cut their wives off.

The man who got a slap in the wrist was clearly hiding a huge amount to prevent his wife getting money. It wasn't "I have two months worth of rent in case I need to escape an abusive spouse." The intent is pretty different.

letsberealforamoment · 2020-05-30T00:04:58+00:00

Lawyer here:

With some exceptions, any property accumulated during the marriage is "marital property". So if during your marriage, you squirrel away a portion of your paycheck into an account held only by you, or buy a car with your incomw....that money or car is marital property and subject to division during a divorce.

Hiding assets during a divorce is a big no no. But having an account only in your names with money in it is fine, regardless of whether you tell spouse or not. It just when it comes time to DISCLOSE assets during the divorce and failing to do (And getting caught) is where people get into trouble.

So, by all means open an account that solely belongs to you. It's up to you whether to DISCLOSE it during the marriage. So the husband turns into a piece of shit, you will havr money to escape. He will.have no access or control over that money. But whrn you get the discovery request in the divorce proceeding, you better DISCLOSE it.

Now if you want to go outside the law, get a safe deposit box at an new bank an hour away from you (Not the same bank you normally use). Open a checking account in order to get the box and get the statements emailed to a dummy email account so your husband will never know about it. Stash the cash in that box . It 99%guaranteed that cash will never be discovered in a divorce.

Cash is moveable, and outside the banking system, much easier to hide. I like cash.

Hiding cash outside the banking system is more risky, but much easier to keep secret. You can stash a 100k in a small briefcase, put it in a plastic bin and hide it in your attic. Or in your mattress. Get creative!

MrsValentine · 2020-05-30T00:42:46+00:00

You're mistakenly associating lying about your assets in a divorce court with having a savings account that your husband is unaware of during your marriage. The point of a "secret fund" is not to hide assets from a judge while going through a divorce. It's so that if you decide to physically and metaphorically leave him (& you will still be legally married at this point), you have money he can't interfere with on hand to do so: you can buy a train ticket to get to your parent's, or hire a van to move your furniture, or put down a deposit on a rental property, or buy a car because he won't let you take the shared family car and you need to drive to work.

pinkyberries · 2020-05-29T21:10:42+00:00

If you trust your family then maybe keep it at your parents house?

In my country people sign their assets on their kids/parents names in case of a divorce.

2020-05-29T22:09:12+00:00

[deleted]

dzgata · 2020-05-30T03:23:58+00:00

Simple: I will be putting that all of my money is absolutely mine and mine alone even if the marriage should end in divorce- onto our marriage contract aka pre nup.

throwaway64857 · 2020-05-30T01:07:52+00:00

You don't need it to be secret as in no one knows about it but have it be composed of your own money that you earned and only you can access it. Have it be enough to get a lawyer or pay a few months of rent/a long term hotel so you can get to safety of necessary.

It would not be in your best interest to lie about money in divorce. It can affect custody, etc. The fact is: if you have to divorce you probably wont be happy with the final decision no matter what.

This is why it's important to be with someone for a while before marrying (a few years) and then getting a prenup before hand. These things still won't prevent divorce, but the choosier you are, the longer you spend with them, and the more difficult you make it to use you consequence free, the less likely you are to encounter a man who will do it.

2020-05-30T05:48:21+00:00

Weird. I guess if that were an issue in my country, I’d save some resell-able jewelry or gold coins and hide them somewhere old-school style.

gcthrowaway2019 · 2020-05-29T23:25:37+00:00

Not sure if you can have a secret one when you're married. Maybe stash it under the name of family you really trust? But that could get you in trouble if you're found out.

I think you it's possible for you to get one just for yourself only it wouldn't be a secret and there might be some red tape involved for your spouse to not get their paws on it.

Other than that, you'd probably have to keep the cash in a box and bury it somewhere.

Have you checked out r/legaladvice?

Kekekeke7777 · 2020-05-29T23:27:09+00:00

This is a good question. Maybe lawyers here can tell us?

Title	How do you have a secret fund when married?
Author	Zoutezee
Upvotes	43
Comments	14
Date	May 29, 2020 6:35 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gsyigv/how_do_you_have_a_secret_fund_when_married/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/how-do-you-have-a-secret-fund-when-married.674877 https://theredarchive.com/post/674877

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