I used to be your typical people-pleaser, bending over backwards for family, friends and acquaintances to keep the peace, even if it meant putting up with shady and outright disrespectful behaviour. During a recent disagreement with a loved one, I remember thinking to myself “I don’t have to put up with this.” And it was a game changer.

You don’t have to put up with disrespect.

You don’t have to put up with being an afterthought.

You don’t have to put with laziness and low effort in your interpersonal relationship.

You don’t have to put up with a toxic job.

You don’t have to put up with sleazy, low value men.

You don’t have to put up with bad sex and selfish lovers (this one took me a loooooooooooooooooooooong time to get my head round).

Once I started saying this affirmation out loud, it was like a light switch went off in my head. Realising and verbalising that I don’t have to put up with whatever bullshit is in front of me had given the courage to stand up for myself in situations where I would have previously rolled over and accepted whatever thrown at me.

Once you start being ruthless with what you aren’t willing to accept two major things will happen. The first is that people will either adapt or leave. If they choose the latter option, they weren’t keeping around anyway. The second thing that will happen is that you will start to feel empowered to go after what you do want in your life, because you will know you have the ability and power to walk away from anything that you don’t want to put up with.