Keep this in mind as you level up Queen 👸

iaintgonnacallyou · 2021-05-25T15:45:31+00:00

I saw a TikTok a few months ago that said “life isn’t about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself” and it completely changed my mindset.

chasingshoesales · 2021-05-25T18:16:20+00:00

I was abused my whole childhood. My narcissistic mother used to tell me how ugly and useless I was. One of the most formidable experiences was when she told me I was the reason we were poor and that the greatest disappointment my family has had was me being born a girl when they thought I would be a boy. No matter what I did, she hated me and did whatever she could to keep me down. My father was completely useless and did not care about the abuse. I was such a wreck after finally being free of the abuse. I started dating abusive men that also would tell me the same things. That I was ugly and of low value because I was a woman.

The funny part is, I'm above average in looks (imho) and I'm pretty damn smart. My whole life I told myself that I was uglier than I saw myself and that every little mistake I made was because I was the dumbest person alive even though I literally had no one raising me. Finding myself was really looking in the mirror and blocking all of them out. It took years, but realizing the truth in others is so important. My abusers needed me to be a hideous woman because our perceived value in society is directly proportional to our beauty. They needed me to feel "less than" so that they could justify making me into a punching bag. They needed me to be useless and stupid so that I had no way of escape from their abuse. They need this because they are pathetic losers. It had absolutely nothing to do with me.

I'm currently 26. I got myself out of poverty with absolutely no help from my family. I got a degree in engineering and make a reasonable salary. I have no abusers in my life. My next steps in finding myself are finding hobbies that I love and friends with shared interest. I had no chance to have a childhood and really explore what I like, but it's never too late! Don't ever let anyone tell you who you are.

alphasquish · 2021-05-25T19:40:23+00:00

I feel like if I tried to “find myself”, I’d be lost as fuck. Truth is, I never created myself. I’ve just been a cumulation of trauma and living up to everyone else’s expectations. My creation is now.

millrice · 2021-05-25T14:14:04+00:00

💯💯💯

QueasyEducation5 · 2021-05-25T14:14:13+00:00

This is so good! 👑

BLUEDIRT93 · 2021-05-25T14:23:25+00:00

Amazing

Noogenesis21 · 2021-05-25T16:32:12+00:00

Needed this so hard today, thank you

fdssavedmylife · 2021-05-25T21:16:47+00:00

I’ve been working on this in my late 20s and have unintentionally been returning to the hobbies, morals, perspectives, and relationships I had as a teenager. I tried really hard to care less, be the “cool” girl, blend in with my peers more. For the first time, I am truly letting go of what others think. Not just in an “are they actively judging me” or “do people like me” kind of way, but in a self-validating, “no one else can love me like I can” and “only I know what’s best for me” way. I’ve stopped trying to figure out the “right” way to act and think. I’m letting my true self surface. Once you stop overanalyzing your actions and just act, you can begin to discover and accept the real you.

2021-05-25T20:58:41+00:00

Queen 👑 talk

Title	Keep this in mind as you level up Queen 👸
Author	BlueJeanMistress
Upvotes	865
Comments	11
Date	May 25, 2021 1:29 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/nkpsep/keep_this_in_mind_as_you_level_up_queen/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/keep-this-in-mind-as-you-level-up-queen.756144 https://theredarchive.com/post/756144

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