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[–]maybelowfds“Throwaway”30 points31 points32 points (4 children) | Copy Link
My biggest mistake in life is just ignoring it and thinking about "his family" (if hes an older man)
[–]Ms_TillyRuthless Strategist21 points22 points23 points (3 children) | Copy Link
I took care of a really elderly air force officer retiree AND his very elderly wife. One morning I wake up and he's standing in my doorway with his hands out. This old PERV says "you know what I want to do with these!" I promptly pushed by him, without knocking his walker using ass over and just left. Fuck him! I immediately called my boss. He was 100% okay with me filing a report, but I honestly didn't want to do that to his wife. Instead, I kept coming over but refused to help him with anything that required me touching him. I very hatefully told him if he can't do things himself then we can call another aide over because I AM NOT touching him. He never needed me to help him with stuff before, so why now? This mf ended up sneaking me $500 cash for my upcoming overseas trip as a thank you for not telling his wife. I didn't even hang it over his head or even mention what happened again, but I took his fucking money.
[+][deleted] (2 children) | Copy Link
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[–]whycantweallgetal0ng10 points [recovered] | Copy Link
Sadly, old men can be the worst. Keep your eyes open around them.
[–]Ms_TillyRuthless Strategist7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It completely took me by surprise. He was in his mid to late 80s. I am very used to this behavior in men (no matter the age) because I have waitressed and bartended at many gross bars, but this took me completely by surprise. It's why I stormed out without finishing my shift or cooking breakfast and immediately called my boss all confused. I liked his wife a lot, so I chose to keep it quiet. But he could tell I was angry and that's why I received "thank you" money that I didn't expect or ask for. I would've turned it down if I didn't need it so badly and he had the money.
[–]haveanicedaytooFDS Disciple25 points26 points27 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I have a positive story to share:
This happened to me once when I was seated next to a tall, plus-sized man. He did his best to not spill over into my seat but it was rather inevitable, but still he leaned into the aisle as much as possible to create as much distance between our bodies as he could. The two times his thigh accidentally touched my thigh, he apologized profusely. He over-apologized just to make it clear he wasn't perving on me and to make sure I felt comfortable and safe. I don't know his story, but probably this wasn't the first time this happened to him due to his size. After the second time, he basically managed to fold himself in two and never touched me again for the remainder of the flight and even helped me with my suitcase.
THAT is the difference between a man who is purposefully trying to perv on you and get away with it, and a man who knows he did something wrong and wants to make it right. If you touch someone by accident, you apologize. You don't keep doing it again and again. Women, trust your instincts. If a guy touches you 'accidentally' and doesn't apologize, it's safe to assume he did it on purpose and is planning on doing it again. Maybe he was too embarrassed to say I'm sorry? Well guess what? Too bad! Tell him 'Please don't touch me again.' in a firm voice and give that baby boy the opportunity to apologize and realize you're not the one to fuck with.
[–]rad_daphneFDS STRATEGY COACH20 points21 points22 points (1 child) | Copy Link
They do it on buses too. Don't let men sit next to you and always get the aisle seat.
[–]greatmanatee2FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The worst is when I have a seat and a guy is standing in front of me, and literally puts his junk in my face. I'm like wtf you doingggg. I always think it's an innocent mistake, but like I would never do that in return
[–]meambleFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
My flight experience:
My parents loved to travel so I’ve been flight hopping all my life. One time we went to San Diego to visit my brother who was stationed out there and the flight was half empty so they invited everyone to spread out and I found a row to myself. Two rows behind me was a man who kept standing up in his seat to get a good look at me, he eventually did when I went to the washroom after which he proceeded to “psst” and make small whistles to try to get my attention. When I finally looked back at him he blew a kiss at me.
I went back and sat with my father.
I was 12.
[–]velocity2dsFDS Disciple13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Everyone is hyper aware of when they are touching someone’s else leg so men who do it know what is happening and they get off on the discomfort and power trip
Like have you ever accidentally touched knees with someone you know on a car ride and you’ll both reposition your bodies to prevent it
[–]knowyourworth69FDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This happened to me on a flight and it was a fucking doctor who was so drunk and kept “accidentally” brushing my chest.
Fuck this guy.
I wish I had given him an earful but was just tired af.
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]pencilmeinplsFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Say "no thanks" to a hug and definitely expect back-lash, but be firm. It's your body and you do not owe anyone physical contact at all. If you're too nervous to fully deny contact, offer a high-five. Do not offer a side-hug as he will most likely turn to make it a full hug like the one you described.
[–]CuriousCatNYC777Ruthless Strategist0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This happened to me in the subway.