I've been seeing a very solid man for about a year and a half. I would have bounced around the one year mark since he had talked marriage but hadn't specifically talked timelines, but right around that time I had an intense health scare. He was there for me every step of the way. I'm recovered and thankful, but ready to move forward now that my health is back.
Yesterday, we were driving to his family's holiday party. He told me he would like to propose when we go on a trip abroad in August 2020. I sat in silence for a moment, collecting my thoughts. I think he thought I was going to explode with joy at the very thought of being picked.
I have an advanced degree, a job I'm passionate about, loyal friends, I plan fantastic events for my company, have creative hobbies that leave me swimming in a sea of dick, I'm funny, and I go to therapy and work on myself. I also have a cute face and what I consider a bangin body. (More women should be willing to toot their own horn and say these things out loud.)
So I told him the truth. "You're wonderful and I could see myself spending my life with you. But I'm too pretty to wait that long for someone to propose to me. I'm sorry, but I'll have moved on by then." I was smiling and clearly not disappointed by his news, just sharing my very realistic thoughts.
He asked me what kind of ring I want and asked me to double-check my ring size.
I'm not going to wait on the promise of future commitment, though. "While I'm happy to pass along that information, until there is a ring on my finger, I am single." Early on, I left my phone open on a table while I went to the bathroom knowing he'd see the literal hundreds of matches I have on Tinder. He knows I'm not playing.
May 2020 will be 2 years. This wonderful man has until February to propose. March 1st, I am either engaged or fully back on the market. I am just too fucking pretty to wait any longer than that.
Edit: How I learned to stop taking shit
I believe in dating around. In the past, I was seeing A, an abusive fuckboi. I was focusing most of my attention on him. See my sad post history for an explanation of the shit I put up with.
During this time I had also started seeing M, the current guy, casually.
A took all of my time and attention because abuse becomes the focal point of your life. M was still hanging around and courting me, but my head was on backward so I only had eyes for A.
Therapy, 2 major health scares, and strong women around me helped me to not only leave A, but realize guys like M were safe and wanted to treat me well. The first health scare helped me leave A. The second one brought me closer to M.
I don't mention my sidelined guys because they're still auditioning for the lead, you know? Not worth noting, but always there.
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