Wasting a year and a half

ZenitGG · 2020-06-17T18:30:46+00:00

Welcome to reality brother

DangZagnut · 2020-06-18T11:23:32+00:00

Welcome to the show.

red-tea-rex · 2020-06-17T23:24:21+00:00

In our youth we all project our own needs and desires on romantic partners. A lot of those needs stem from an attempt to model the love relationship (familial love part, not physical) you received or desired from your parents, but this is based on dependence and codependence. It's immature love based on your need rather than simple enjoyment of the company of someone. It's why it's so devastating when it doesn't work out or they don't meet our expectations. When we attach, we attach tremendous significance. I'm sorry you're going through this, we've all been through it. Myself a number of times. The happy truth is you as a man can be happier longer than she can. You can date young women long after she's post wall. The sad truth is she can hop dicks super easy for now, but that'll come back on her in the long run. Another sad truth is it does get harder to bond like that the more you go around the ferris wheel. But that's growing up. It'll help you keep your head clear and recognize and stamp out involvement with such immaturity. Whether you are in a relationship or not the gauge of whether you are over this one and healthy emotionally is if you believe you don't need to be in one. Men usually do something self destructive after they say ,"I can't live without her." Right now you're still split in half. It's a physiological wound. Give it time. Even if it doesn't feel like it now the pain will pass and other women will come along. Some worse some better. Get to grieving the loss and then get busy living your life. That's more important than relationships. Women, while offering some pretty fantastic benefits, are always a net burden on men. You need one now like you need a boat or an expensive luxury car.

krodarklorr · 2020-06-17T17:37:07+00:00

That sucks man, but for the record, you can still get pussy while going your own way. Casual dating isn't an issue. And as long as she doesn't leave a toothbrush, have at it.

firebrace451 · 2020-06-17T18:12:45+00:00

Just remember she's eventually going to message you again and you need to be able.to ghost ASAP. You will be tempted.

spicylimes · 2020-06-18T06:07:12+00:00

Sounds like this one has a cluster B(itch) personality disorder... what you experienced was emotional abuse, I’m sorry this happened to you. It doesn’t need to define you. There is far more to life and who you are than the short amount of time you spent with this gross person. Return to your sense of self and individuality, don’t be fixated.

[deleted] · 2020-06-18T05:36:04+00:00

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tar--palantir · 2020-06-18T05:24:42+00:00

There is no better thing than a relationship to remind you why you should not be in a relationship.

callmeDannyDanielz · 2020-06-18T04:59:18+00:00

If you love pussy start with make Friends with benefits.

kakramer1211 · 2020-06-18T03:33:36+00:00

You need not foreswear women. That is not MGTOW at all. It is a total misread. You don't need to hate women or give them up at all. Just don't let them manipulate you. Keep your head about you at all times and if they begin being posessive or demanding brush that one off and go one. Remind yourself that you were just fine without her before and you will be again. Women are here to help you not to control you or weigh you down. You must decide whether to allow her to become pregnant with your child and if it does happen then you must be open to using your resources for the good of the child. You need to be a man and step up to your half of that responsibility. But you are the one in charge of you. You are going your own way now.

[deleted] · 2020-06-18T10:56:15+00:00

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DubsPackage · 2020-06-18T11:15:08+00:00

They're all disposable until proven otherwise.

Your mistake was in making her your priority, make YOUR OWN LIFE your priority.

Let her take care of her own happiness, if she wants other men let her go.

bbooit · 2020-06-18T12:54:12+00:00

NIGGGGGGGEEEEEEERRRRR

1-2-3_KID · 2020-06-18T15:01:44+00:00

Dude it seems like she wanted to dump you for some while. The signs were clearly there the lack of affection, her hitting on other guys, taking a guys number at the bar in front of you. Its just she wanted you to dump her, so in the future she could come back easier if you ended things instead of her. Because if she ended it and come back, you wouldn’t accept her back as she has the grass is greener on the other-side mentality.

The things you have to take away from this, is never put up with a womans bullshit and let her disrespect you. You dump her fast and ghost.

sterculese89 · 2020-06-18T21:44:35+00:00

My marriage was sort of like that.

Anyway, the important thing and in my case as well is that you don’t own any property with her and you don’t have any kids with her, so basically your scott-free and dodged a much bigger bullet.

She’s somebody else’s problem now, and you are freeeeeee mofo. And a little wiser perhaps.

[deleted] · 2020-06-19T20:12:32+00:00

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eziocreed125 · 2020-06-18T03:23:07+00:00

Don't make women the center of your life, but just a complement to your life.

VestigialHead · 2020-06-18T00:47:15+00:00

Not all men go through this. But the majority do. It is a common pattern these days.

What is important is that you learn from your mistakes. If you do decide to embark on another relationship you need to communicate about any sort of red flag fairly quickly and if things do not improve get out of there quickly.

MGTOW would not be getting into the relationship in the first place, but as you are dating you are not quite MGTOW yet and that is fine. Everyone is different and has to do them. Just be wary.

qemist · 2020-06-18T01:50:14+00:00

You were ill-suited. She needed a man who could play the controlling sexfiend role. Passivity is a cry for domination.

ftm39498 · 2020-06-17T20:45:00+00:00

Oh man this sounds exactly like my last (EVER) serious relationship, including the eye fucking other dudes in front of me. I feel your pain completely man. It certainly takes a while to heal after something like this.

peguy2000 · 2020-06-17T17:43:42+00:00

Something similiar happend to me. Gone monk since (1year ago) and never felt better. Life truly is the best once you start investing in yourself

Lifeat35 · 2020-06-17T17:58:34+00:00

Sorry man, it’s always the same plot, different story, and the outcome is shitty every time.

Just remember: No marriage, no cohabitation.

cheapshotfrenzy · 2020-06-17T18:55:53+00:00

Forget about love for a minute. What do you like to do? Picture yourself having fun, relaxing, or just being content. What are you picturing? For me it's restoring cars, forging knives, and meditating. MGTOW's not about how to not love or treat women. It's about how to love and treat yourself. It's Zen, man.

gre2704 · 2020-06-17T18:56:16+00:00

Sounds a lot like my first and only relationship.

Don't look at it as a waste of time. Look at it as a learning experience. I did and as soon as the rage subsided that relationship plus all the stories my friends told me was enough for me to just stop pursuing. The juice ain't worth the squeeze.

Woupsea · 2020-06-17T19:10:24+00:00

This is the way it goes dude, I got my heart broken a while ago too and I’m still kinda shaken getting back on my feet again. You don’t have to completely abandon women in order to recognize your self worth as a man though, just take your time bro

fuckyallmat · 2020-06-17T19:33:09+00:00

So mgtow2 is the new redpill?

StickyNoodle69 · 2020-06-17T19:34:51+00:00

She's the typical whore just using you for entertainment. If she's not even pretending to have remorse, then you know for sure you made the right move. You sound pretty young. You'll eventually find someone when you're older, maybe. Just focus on yourself and making that bread.

justletmemakeanacc · 2020-06-17T19:38:40+00:00

Part of the MGTOW journey. There's nothing wrong with continuing to sleep with women if that's what you decide for yourself.

Trust issues are often seen in a bad light but they're actually great. They make you think harder before trusting anyone. I don't know how or why that's a bad thing. Just because they're societally negative doesn't mean they're wrong. Society gets a lot wrong. That's why most of us are here i guess. I have trust issues too but i'm appreciative of them.

As a man, you'll never find a women that isn't using you for something. Men aren't loved unconditionally. They're loved under the condition that they provide something.

Good luck on the rest of your journey mate.

Sigma1Enigma · 2020-06-17T19:57:55+00:00

OP Don't waste your time. Save your dignity bro

Fucking pussy can definitely be apart of your way. Chasing pussy should not.

LuciusCSulla · 2020-06-17T20:04:14+00:00

Sonny boy, she's just a GD humanoid and like all humanoids everything is measured with quid pro quo. You made an error which you will recover from and press on. Learn from it. Deal with it. You rid yourself of a user and will attempt to scramble back to you once she realizes Chad and Tyrone aren't paying for shit.

Gokusayan1 · 2020-06-17T20:20:50+00:00

It's red pill rage mode I hope soon you will calm down and see the world REAL world.

micafe · 2020-06-17T20:44:40+00:00

Hey Man, I wouldn’t handle that much shit as you did!

🍻 for your newly, to be found, happiness.

victor_knight · 2020-06-18T01:34:23+00:00

Stop wasting your time/energy/money on women. I know you like to fuck but that's what hookers/call-girls/escorts are for. It's not just girlfriends or wives that have a monopoly on the sex men are allowed to have, by the way. Also, who gives a shit if she's "really into you" or not? Do women care if men are "really into them" during sex? Hell no. So why should you care? If she is, great. If not, your dick is still wet and that pussy is still warm. How you feel about women now is just your DNA altering your brain chemistry because it doesn't want to die with its host body (and wants to get sent into the future).

Blunt_Sage · 2020-06-17T21:08:38+00:00

After reading all that, the one thing that stands out to me is that she was never your girl. When a woman takes you for granted it means she's only with you out of convenience, until something better comes along. This is not someone worth investing your time, money, or emotions in.

TheVineyard1996 · 2020-06-17T21:23:46+00:00

You're in for a ride my friend. Either you're gonna fall on that slippery slope then rise or you'll pick yourself up right from the get-go. How you deal with it is entirely up to you. Use this pain and anger and put it into something positive. Work out, find a job you'd like, or maybe even find a new hobby. Hang out with your mates more, buy a gaming console, you can literally do anything you want. No more money-grubbing succubus to drag you down. That's just really fucked up how she got this dudes number in a bar while you guys were together. If I may ask, how could you let that slide? I'm not gonna judge I'm just curious. I probably would've made a scene and beat the shit outta the dude just to teach her a lesson and then leave but that's just me. People will treat you the way you allow them to. So if you want to work on something, you should look at how you treat yourself.

PS don't let that bitch win. Quit thinking abt her and move on. Sounds hard but trust me if you do this your life will be so much more peaceful. There's also a thing called karma for her.

TyrannosaurusSexx_ · 2020-06-17T21:27:37+00:00

The same happened to me in high school, but mine was an amazing actor. I got to know that she was acting and hated me the whole damn time and that too only when I had access to her Instagram without her knowing. She only wanted me as a trophy and I wanted her as a partner. Seeing the chats she had with other women finally got "AWALT" engraved in my brain and I'll never go back again. You dodged a bullet brother. Let your inner simp die and enjoy your afterlife. It's either monk mode or pump and dump. You make it sound like you want to put a leash on yourself again. But it's the exact opposite that you should consider, let yourself free and live life for what it's worth.

jjefferson1994 · 2020-06-17T21:30:27+00:00

This all came to a head when I started the fight last month. Still believeing her gaslighting BS about me being a controlling, jealous freak I didn't bring that up but I did bring up her lack of affection, her lack of instigating sex making me be the only one in our relationship ever having to face any kind of rejection and her never ever touching me in a affectionate, attracted way without me doing it first and then only doing it reactionarily or me having to ask her and her reluctantly doing it. She started bringing up other shit to make me feel like an asshole that had nothing to do with what I was talking about, forcing me to apologize like always. I gave her a reverse ultimatum that she had given me a few months before; Either give me the affection I deserve and need or I find someone whos not a cold hearted bitch(not my words then but my words now).

You perfectly described a year with my last ex. Good riddance to her dude. Just focus on yourself lol. It's not worth the headache.

dajonn · 2020-06-17T23:51:12+00:00

My brother focus on giving all that love you was giving her to yourself.

Beebs81 · 2020-06-18T00:06:26+00:00

Don't be too hard on yourself. Some lessons are best learnt the hard way. Take this time to find yourself again and be the man you want to be. After a while, you will realise how traumatic that experience was and how manipulated you were. The beautiful thing is, you won't let that happen again. It takes most people a life time to learn that lesson. It hurts, life can be tough but being the REAL you makes it all worth it.

ASTRA-LUX · 2020-06-18T00:32:09+00:00

I’m a firm believer of karma. Hang in there, OP... Karma will get this person one way or the other.

markii300 · 2020-06-18T00:32:42+00:00

Been there, done that, know how it feels, I hear you brother.

Once you start living life on your terms, you'll feel alot happier.

Don't ignore red flags, otherwise they will walk all over you. Once they know you won't put up with bullshit, you'll command so much more respect.

Ryn1276 · 2020-06-20T16:39:00+00:00

Ooh...was her name Laura? 😋 Seriously though, sorry to hear it.

onLyK_ · 2020-06-17T21:14:50+00:00

Yea we still smash bro we just don’t get cuffed. Big difference.

Title	Wasting a year and a half
Author	UWerePrepared
Upvotes	10
Comments	72
Date	June 17, 2020 5:11 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW2
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW2/comments/havhhx/wasting_a_year_and_a_half/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW2/wasting-a-year-and-a-half.807621 https://theredarchive.com/post/807621

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