I have always been what many refer to as a "man's man" I'm a metalworker by trade have always lifted and done physical sports like football and been involved in my kids wrestling team. That being said my marriage had taken a turn for the worse and I did what most guys do I talked about it with my wife. She did a lot of goalpost moving and all kinds of other bullshit excuses. Like a schmuck I did the choreplay thing for a long time thinking if she wasn't so tired and saw all my hard work she'd fuck me more. We did marriage therapy for almost a year. Nothing worked. Well I'm here to tell anyone who will listen that all the love in the world just couldn't fix this. So I started digging into myself. I've been working on my self improvement for a little over 2 years. I've been lifting regularly for about six. I'm pretty jacked for a married guy nearing 40 with 3 kids. Anyway I was doing the steps long before I stumbled across this sub. But I never really thought about the shit tests thing. I've always tried to remove conflict from my marriage because it brought me back to being that lil bit being scolded by his mommy. I didn't like the feeling so I always just went along to get along. Until this weekend. I woke up a little later than I usually do and started getting ready for the gym. My wife comes down and says "I've got a breakfast date with my aunt at 9am I need you here by 8:45" it was about 7:45 at the time with a 5 min drive to the gym. I took this moment to push against this test. I said I'll be here by 9 so you will be a little late. You didn't communicate to me the time you were going and I need at least an hour for my gym time. She said no I said 8:45 and if I'm late I'll be upset to which I replied "I don't care" and I walked out the door. When I was at the gym she texted me some stuff but I just ignored it and did my thing. I got back at 9 and she was waiting outside with a shitty attitude. She tried to goad me into an emotional response but I stayed calm and said "I'm sorry you being a few mins late upset you but that's a you problem, have a great time at your ladies breakfast I'll see you when you get home I love you" she slammed the car door and left. In the past I'd stew on that and be worried she'd be mad at me. Now I just don't gaf. Guess who came home with no attitude. You guys I think this shit might actually work! I've always thought "meh it'll never work on my highly educated, independent,sexy ass wife" but it's working and so I'll start working thru levels 5-12 next. I've already got several women who've told me they're free use if I want to play outside my marriage but I'll keep that in the back pocket for when I need it. I love my wife and I want to make it work first without the nuclear option. Good luck out there fellas and remember "Stay Hard motherfucker'"