Precursor to The Current Dude:

There's a common pattern for some men who've made their way here in their various levels of sucking, but actually stayed at it: They find MRP after living on porn, jacking off in the corner and scrolling around looking for some answers as to why his woman, who at one point in time, was all over him like there was no tomorrow, now barely looks at or touches him and only participates in an obligatory session once every week or two. Somehow he finds this little corner on the web and reads Steel's intro. He reads a couple weeks worth of OYS's and he's reading things that are only in his fantasy world of masturbation. Women actually putting in sexual effort for their men. Women actually thanking their men after sex. 'These men must be lucky to not get a broken one like I did' he thinks. Then he reads MITW's Validation Needs, then he finds Horns Depressive and Anxious Wives. He wonders, is this really a me issue? He starts using his eyes for the first time and gets angry. Very angry. But, he sees a path, puts down his lube and decides to do this because his sex life sucks and maybe there's something to this. You know the story, he gets a gym membership, shuts his mouth, shores up his mental models, rids his life of covert contracts (mostly) and is generally becoming a little more awesome...and confident...and usually social...and then goes out playing catch and release...

The current dude:

He's generally about 3 to 6 months in depending on his level of previous suck. He has ten or more years behind him of failing himself and his woman. He used to be socially anxious, afraid of his wife and women in general. He used to be nice so the world would be nice to him. But now, he's owning his shit. He's going out, he's more confident, having fun, playing catch and release and even with some rejections, he starts to see how easy this is. The IOI's show up from other women and it strokes that ego that hasn't been fully shed yet. His woman is back at home somewhere in limbo. Confused maybe, pissed maybe, not trusting his change maybe, who knows but the years of him sucking and failing haven't made their way out of her yet. Call it what you want, 1000 ft rope or whatever. Either way, she hasn't caught up... or cares. So, from his (reactive) perspective what does this look like to him?

A woman who still isn't pulling out the sexual arsenal like he thinks she should and how he wants.

The second Anger Phase:

Now, that blinding ego that used to tell him how awesome he was when he sucked is in overdrive on the other side telling him just how awesome he actually is now and that his woman should be pulling out the arsenal and worshipping his cock like the other guys wives he reads about. Hey, after all this work, he deserves it. Enter a new infusion of shortcut thinking. He starts to wonder what life would be like without his wife, how easily he could mold a new woman from scratch, how easy it would be to sleep with other women because he has learned OI and IDGAF and now sex is no longer about validation (right?). He could easily sleep with a woman that would crawl across the floor and over broken glass...He is getting impatient, frustrated, reacting and entertaining the short 'n easy game...

The Future Dude:

He is an option. Remember the Previous Dude? He's nothing like the Current Dude. The Future Dude will be different than the Current Dude. Your new mental models have not caught up to you if you can't recognize this covert contract. I'm moralizing, right? Nope. Do as you wish because you'll ultimately be OK, and it's actually entertaining for us when you play the short 'n easy game. If you think this is about not cheating, you're missing the point. It's about recognizing your ego, not reacting, persistence, patience, forward thinking and figuring out what you want during this second anger phase. You know, becoming a man. This is probably the final large covert contract you're going to face.

I remember that space, it was real. It was hard to think straight sometimes. I easily could've blown the whole thing up because "I deserved better after all this work!" I could've and I would've been fine. This is a great time to drive, with action, the sex life you want. In the spirit of trading notes, for those of you that find yourself deep in the second anger phase and you are really unsure of what you want, that future dude is an option. You can put that call on him until you, your new mental models and vision are at least more clear and congruent. Shed your fear and create the sex life you want and have fun. Internalize 'Good sex is your responsibility.' Be a man who fucks. See if time allows your awesomeness and her response to you catch up with each other. Maybe it won't, who knows? How long do you give it? Your call - time does have it's limits. But you may be surprised at what you find after this phase. I was - still am.

That current dude is either here now, will be here soon, or you remember him. This second anger phase will probably be the last large covert contract that dude will kill.