Chateau Bullshit

d357r0y3r · 2011-10-20T19:34:01+00:00

While parts of this article are true (confidence is attractive), it perpetuates some dangerous myths that could really hurt some guys that are struggling with women.

O.K., so you want to get laid? Here’s how you do it. Smell clean, get in the proximity of women, and then ignore them. When they come to fuck you, and they will, shut up and let it happen.

That's not how you get laid, even if you're very attractive and confident; that's not how our society works. Maybe it's cultural or maybe there are biological explanations, but men have to initiate contact in most if not all situations. The women you want will not come to you, especially if they don't know you. The fact that you even said this makes me question how much success you've really had with women.

You've created a caricature of the "PUA community" (cringe) and peddled it as if it reflects reality. It doesn't.

Ultimately, "pick up" is not (or at least, should not be) about "getting PUSSY". That might be the end goal for a lot of guys starting out, but you miss a lot of nuance in your analysis. You should want to improve yourself. You should want to expand your social circle. You should want to become better at communicating and building personal connections. You should want to have a healthier, stronger body, and you should take pride in your physical appearance. When you work on these things, you will become more attractive.

The idea that you should "just be who you are" is highly destructive for a lot of men. If "who you are" is a basement dweller that plays WoW 16 hours a day, you kind of suck. You should be the best version of yourself, which means taking action and making things happen. You have to go after the things you want; great things will not usually fall into your lap.

urfaselol · 2011-10-20T20:00:13+00:00

O.K., so you want to get laid? Here’s how you do it. Smell clean, get in the proximity of women, and then ignore them. When they come to fuck you, and they will, shut up and let it happen.

Speaking as a relatively attractive dude who gets approached when I'm out. This does not work unless you just want the bottom feeders. The girls that approach you are generally the ones you don't want from my experience. If you want the truly attractive women, they will almost never come to you. You have to go out, find them yourself and pursue them.

frogma · 2011-10-20T20:15:33+00:00

I hate to say it man, but you sound like someone who hasn't actually gone out very often. And if you have, you haven't actually interacted with girls very often. What you're describing in this article is some sort of "ideal" that most guys couldn't even hope to accomplish any time soon- maybe they will in the future, but certainly not now. Do you realize how many guys already dress nicely, look clean, and shit like that, without having any success with women? I'd say that describes MOST men. The fact that it's worked for you means you either already have a ton of natural confidence and know how to "play the game," or you haven't had much success but you're acting like it's a lot.

Either way, in this article, all you're talking about is shit that will require a ton of work for most guys. They can't just flip a switch and become you. So what would you say to them?

ARealSocialRetard · 2011-10-20T21:49:17+00:00

It kind of saddens me that you live in a world where the only reason you could think of for wanting to improve oneself is that it'll bring the "pussy" to you.

Pickup Game is not about anything more than providing a set of social dynamics by which we live, or by which we should be living. There is a set structure for how we interact with other people in virtually all circumstances:

Meet a new coworker: you shake their hand, introduce yourself, maybe answer a few questions about what you do for the company, and offer help if they need it while they're getting acclimated.

See a good friend on the street: You shake hands, maybe do a bro hug, ask how he's doing, laugh a bit, and move on.

Meet an attractive girl you'd like to get to know better: ???

The point of "PUA" is to teach you how to be the best version of yourself that you can be. It's about teaching you to be able to be confident enough in yourself that you can go against "conventional wisdom" and do your own thing. We all know that attractive women are used to hearing compliments about their looks all the time. So why would you walk up to an attractive girl and give her a compliment about her looks? Answer: You wouldn't—or at least, you wouldn't if you want to be perceived differently from all the other guys. Instead, you say something that sets you apart.

But frogma's right: I don't think you're going to get anywhere by not approaching. I don't know what universe you live in, but where I'm from, women don't ever make the first move, and never have.

Bobsutan · 2011-10-19T22:46:34+00:00

This article reminds me of why I posted this. Allow me to translate that article at hand:

blah blah blah "be confident", blah blah blah "just be yourself".

I've written extensively on the subject of male self-improvement with the purpose of communicating with women towards the ends of starting a sexual relationship. I agree with the overall sentiment that if you've got your shit together that women will gravitate towards attractive men, but the problem is presuming men can just choose to be attractive and thus women will gravitate to them. The world simply doesn't work that way. Having over 4 years experience in the community, it's clear to me he has a gross misunderstanding about what pickup/game/learned charisma or whatever you want to call it is all about. What you see online and in books are training wheels, no more than going to Toastmasters, drivers ed, or a math tutor would be for those who would like to improve their skills regarding a given activity. At the end of the self-improvement process, for those who actually go through the process full circle, that's when what he's saying starts to become true.

Here are three guides I've written on the subject in the last few months:

Newbies guide to game

Class Notes - Week 1: Attraction & Approaching

Class Notes - Week 2: Qualification and more

Personally I see game and the MRM as two sides of the same coin, a ying & yang of sorts. The MRM gives men awareness of the pitfalls they face in relationships and society in general, whereas Game gives men the tools for screening women and having the kinds of relationships they want on their own terms. By doing so men then have the ability to avoid a lot of the bullshit that's affecting western men in the first place. I touched on this in the Qualification guide linked to above.

Title	Chateau Bullshit
Author	avoiceformen
Upvotes	3
Comments	22
Date	October 19, 2011 7:36 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/lhthp/chateau_bullshit/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/chateau-bullshit.1032881 https://theredarchive.com/post/1032881

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