It doesn't matter. If a women accusses you of something, specifically sexual harassment you're done. Period. You will be given no chance to defend yourself. Testimony from other parties proving your innocence is irrelevant.

No matter what lengths you go to in order to make sure you are covered in the event of a false allegations is also irrelevant.

I have 3 teenage daughters. I was raised by a single mother. I respect everyone until they individually acted in a way that does not warrant that level of respect.. Men, women, somewhere in the middle it doesn't matter. Specifically in the workplace.

I know where the lines are. I do not text female coworkers from my personal phone. If I have to text them outside of standard business hours, I use my work phone.

Before I send a text, I take the time to think how each text could be interpreted when all context is removed. This applies to emails, face to face interactions, everything.

I make a point to never to be alone with female coworker. Ever. Whether it's a corporate sponsored event or not, I never want to be in a he said/she said situation. Err on the side of caution. Always.

The MeToo movement reemphasized the importance of being extra conscious with regards to women in general, specifically women coworkers. Especially when you are in a position of leadership.

Turns out, none of that matters. 10+ years without so much as a blip on HRs radar, I was terminated for inappropriate behavior. I was accused of telling my administrative assistant I was going to fuck her. The event where I allegedly said this, I didn't even attend. Come to find out (because I have friends in HR as well as friends that work with her husband) her husband thought we were "getting to close" so he told his wife to either get me fired, quit, or he was going to kick her out. He even went and bragged about it to people he apparently did not know I knew. I will get to how this had already come back to haunt him in a bit.

In the end none of it mattered. I was terminated on the spot. No severance, no pension, just "mail us all your equipment and fuck off".

Luckily the industry I work in is huge, but very tight-knit. Word traveled fast despite HRs best efforts to say I was terminated because I did not agree with the RTO policy. (There was no RTO policy)

I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but I am well known in the industry. Just about everyone (thay matters) saw through this the moment they caught wind of it and since my non-compete and non-solicit were voided, it ultimately turned out to be a blessing in disguise, but I am still having trouble getting past 1 thing.

How can a man with a spotless record, multiple testimony from others that not only I would never say that but I WASNT EVEN AT THE EVENT THIS ALLEGEDLY TOOK PLACE get terminated because of a single unsubstantiated allegations?

When I read stories about professional athletes of celebrities who were ultimately blacklisted due to false allegations I always thought surely there is more to the story.

Not anymore.

TL,DR; I am struggling to come to terms that your career, character, integrity can be destroyed by a single allegation. Everything else is irrelevant. Proof you weren't at said event means nothing. If a woman accuses you of something in the workplace or not. Corporate sponsored event or not, you're done.

Imagine how that conversation went with my daughters? Without a doubt the hardest thing I have done in my life even though they know I do not act or talk that way.

How do you come to terms with this and ultimately get past it? Frankly, I am terrified to work with women. I work in a male-dominated industry, but my point still stands. No matter what lengths you go to to insulate yourself from potential allegations, it ultimately doesn't make a difference. 1 accusation of saying something I didn't say at an event I have proof I never attended is all it takes.

How do you accept this and move forward?

I have accepted a number of harsh realities in life, but this one is really giving me problems. I honestly don't know what else I can do to prevent this from happening in the future. You can say lightning doesn't strike the same place twice, but are you sure about that?