"Man Up" - Does that get to you too?

jlevy1126 · 2014-05-28T19:31:17+00:00

sometimes i think it is ok, if it is meant to be like "sort yourself out, and do your best" or "stop wasting your time" etc

though,it can also be used in a pretty pathetic way too, to attempt to shame people. and thats just silly. but along the same lines as an opinion i posted in another thread, i dont care if people want to try and shame someone, that just shows themselves in a bad light, and people need to "man up" about being told to "man up" imo.

i dont understand why people are so sensitive to words? calling someone a bad mother, or a bad father, a bad friend, an idiot, lazy, any of these things, who the hell cares? seriously as an adult, if you are worried by things people say to you then .... well, how do i put it? .... just get over it, and grow up, you arent 10 years old anymore and you need to be bigger than "someone said a bad word about me, boohoo" or whatever it may be

i dont really like this side of MRA stuff tbh, complaining about something someone said is just so childish imo. either what they said is accurate and you really do need to "man up" or "sort yourself out", or what they said is not accurate and you just need to tell them to mind their own business, or to fuck off, or ignore them etc

imo there is a such a thing as "being a man", and it is that thing we are blessed with that separates us from women and children. you do not have to accept the job of being a man if you wish, you do not have to do it just because you have a penis, that is up to you.

i think that this phrase "be a man" or "man up" is being abused by MRA to mean something that it doesnt, it doesnt mean that you must act a certain because you have a penis, it is a free world and you can act however you like; go buy a dress and wear make up if you wish. "man up" means take care of your business, dont be a burden, provide for your family and so on, its a good thing, and i like being a male and i try to be a man also

HolySchmoly · 2014-05-29T09:15:45+00:00

I just heard this item come up on the BBC radio news.

The presenter John Simpson said, from memory, just after the item finished,

"If it's a woman do you say 'woman up'"?

The female co-presenter said,

"No. You still say 'man up' anyway".

"Really? That's got to be sexist," replied John.

It's now official. The BBC backs the MRM. Let's not announce it till we get the brass band ready.

MRSPArchiver · 2014-05-28T18:23:19+00:00

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HolySchmoly · 2014-05-28T20:52:10+00:00

Yes. It's a horrible sexist term, but just a new take on a very old theme.

It used to be that the opposite of manning up was being gay. Being gay was seen as being about as bad as being a paedophile is now. It was just the worst thing people could think of you.

So it was important to be a real man. I never thought that would change. Lo and behold it did. Gradually it became acceptable, even cool, to be gay. Now men can even get married. That really is pretty incredible.

But still we have this man up trope. That makes me wonder. Could someone say "man up" to an openly gay guy? How weird would that be, if at all?

Still, I guess being gay has lost its one-time connotation with being effeminate, rightly so, so it would not be so strange.

But what would happen if a really effete, camp gay guy was told to man up? Would that at least be kind of ridiculous?

But then why are those guys not under an obligation to man up but straight guys are? So the underlying sexist straight-jacket in which men must live is preserved, but gay men are given an out, seemingly.

Here is a thought. What would happen if Snowden did a Chelsea Manning? Would duck-face still get away with telling him to man up then? Seems to me in that context the rhetorical force of the metaphor would be changed, and probably weakened.

This seems to tell us something about men's rights versus gay rights: gays have them, men don't. What's interesting is that gay men just are men. Perhaps the term should be amended to "straight man up" to reveal its full insidious implications.

xNOM · 2014-05-29T00:07:53+00:00

HedonisticLo · 2014-05-29T00:45:40+00:00

I'll put this way:

"Assume your biological role as a male and put yourself in harms way to prove you are the more viable specimen to mate with."

I like to be technical.

SumGai984 · 2014-05-29T01:47:04+00:00

Huh. I've always taken "man up" as a call to fulfill the suffering required of me in order to obtain virtue. I guess it's always been pretty easy to spot when someone's being facetious, and I usually smirk and reply along the lines of, "Sure; you first."

But I can see it getting annoying.

nachtliche · 2014-05-29T02:35:14+00:00

Letting some one tell you how to be a man, isn't very manly.

nodingle · 2014-05-29T06:31:04+00:00

John sucks ass, but I like the phrase "man up".

Women love men who save the day. It can be disappointing when they whine about inequality.

Griever423 · 2014-10-31T03:05:59+00:00

I go through this at my job constantly. I am a male nurse and in the nursing industry I am a minority. I hear sexist comments frequently such as: You're a man, come help me carry (x), or "Be a gentleman and let her sit there," "You're a man, you're supposed to help me when I ask you for help because I'm a girl (dead serious)."

It really gets to me sometimes. I feel like there is such a double standard. When I've talked to my co-workers about it they tell me to "stop being so sensitive" or "you shouldn't let that bother you."

jlevy1126 · 2014-05-28T20:25:51+00:00

It gets to me, but I am a woman! Guys have used it talking to me sometimes, and though I found it insulting, I really think the message is "get your Sh together!" or "toughen up!" which are insulting/tough love ways of telling you to be stronger- usually coming from people who believe you can be braver than you are, or make better choices, etc.

In this specific Snowden case, I really don't think it applies in any context at all. It's kind of laughable... why didn't the american gov "man up" and admit to their crimes? ... it just doesn't apply at all. Snowden did "man up" and leave his cush job to reveal crimes for everyone's benefits. What's braver than that?

I agree that strength and weakness (usually associated with females) are genderless. Ideally, there would be no expectations based on our gender, but I think the outlook for that is honestly so bleak.....

Piroko · 2014-05-28T18:29:24+00:00

Nope.

Man up and fight for what you truly want.

I think it makes you angry because you know that things are so bent against you right now that your ancestors in your shoes wouldn't take it, but you're the one with the burden of living now and having to confront these issues you didn't create.

Nomenimion · 2014-05-28T18:33:02+00:00

Who is this asshole to tell anyone to man up? The Obama administration has taken a hatchet to the Constitution. They are the real traitors.

Title	"Man Up" - Does that get to you too?
Author	jlevy1126
Upvotes	10
Comments	44
Date	May 28, 2014 6:23 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/mensrights/comments/26ps24/man-up-does-that-get-to-you-too/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/man-up-does-that-get-to-you-too.1617687 https://theredarchive.com/post/1617687

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