What toxic femininity is

Orange_Paisley · 2017-11-16T06:38:06+00:00

I hate the supposition that women cry to just to get attention or to manipulate. Some of us legit cry because we can’t turn off the waterworks. I hate when I cry and I do my best to suppress it (especially at work) but I can’t help it. Then to have some jackass say that I am doing it on purpose just makes it worse.

FairlyNaive · 2017-11-16T07:33:56+00:00

We had exact same word for word thread posted before here

/u/alreadyredschool /u/hyperrreal

notworthmuch20xx · 2017-11-16T06:33:17+00:00

I can think of far worse things

Eastuss · 2017-11-16T08:23:33+00:00

Isn't the principle of toxic masculinity/femininity about the idea that we enforce the stereotype rather than being about the stereotypes themselves?

Like, a man too obsessed with his strength isn't toxicaly masculine. A man telling you that you're not a real man because you're not strong is toxic masculinity.

Grizzlybear_Nobility · 2017-11-16T07:44:41+00:00

Women don't really cry to manipulate men. First of all, due to the many array of hormones that regulate our menstrual cycles ( mainly estrogens and progesterones, which are classes of many interacting hormones and not just two hormones) some women can be more emotional, plain and simple (though that doesn't impair their mental abilities, mind you). These affect other hormones in turn, including your endorphin levels (the happy hormone). Adding oestrogens and progestins to the mix can often make that worse.

Women also have more prolactin, which promotes tear production, while testosterone is thought to discourage it. Prolactin aids in milk production, so it's no surprise that women make more of that.

Men's tear ducts are smaller, as opposed to women's, which are much larger.

Women, especially women on birth control, blink A LOT more than men, though researchers still don't know why. This means that any tears on the waterline will be pushed out of the eye and become visible before draining, where as with men it gets whicked away before blinking occurs more often.

BiggerDthanYou · 2017-11-16T07:56:57+00:00

Close, but not quite right.

You are conflating being feminine in a harmful way and toxic femininity. Femininity is about what is being considered feminine in a society.

Similarly toxic masculinity isn't about harmful things that men do either, but about societal attitudes that push men to do those things. For example owning a gun isn't necessarily toxic, but calling men faggots for not owning a gun that's toxic masculinity. There are plenty of reasons why one would not go to the doctor, but it's toxic masculinity that says that you aren't a Real Man if you need help.

There are a lot more societal attitudes along the lines of "you aren't a real man if you don't do [something dangerous/harmful/etc]", but rarely ones that say that you aren't a real woman if you don't do [something dangerous/harmful/etc] which is why the better analogous concept is "passive femininity"

GridReXX · 2017-11-16T13:53:36+00:00

I find parts of femininity and masculinity detrimental as with all things.

I wouldn’t call femininity toxic.

The detrimental parts of masculinity are toxic. The detrimental parts of femininity are passive.

tempuserthrowaway5 · 2017-11-16T11:23:09+00:00

Nice fictional character you're building there.

Since we are writing fiction let me give you a few more to add to the pile.

She shoots laser beams out of her eyes when she takes a crap
She's a witch who flew through my window and bit my shoes
She dried up the cattle

There now you can put a blonde wig and a bra on that pile of straw and light it at burning man.

Title	What toxic femininity is
Author	discord_doodle
Upvotes	1
Comments	88
Date	November 16, 2017 5:25 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/7daa8w/what_toxic_femininity_is/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-toxic-femininity-is.264844 https://theredarchive.com/post/264844

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