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Intro Post

eliza_schuyler · 2016-04-06T05:18:04+00:00

Good afternoon, I'm new to RP after reading without posting for a couple of months. The impetus to join the RPW community has been my SO's recent...

eliza_schuyler

April 6, 2016

21 upvotes

/r/RedPillWives

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Post Information

Title	Intro Post
Author	eliza_schuyler
Upvotes	21
Comments	46
Date	April 6, 2016 5:18 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWives
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/comments/4dkeku/intro_post/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWives/intro-post.210190 https://theredarchive.com/post/210190

Comments

[–]Camille113256 points7 points8 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler4 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet 5 points5 points5 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler 7 points7 points7 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Thank you for your reply!
I have loved any threads discussing Laura Doyle's The Surrendered Wife. I've also been most influenced by a number of threads that have discussed treating your SO as a "guest" and treating your SO better than you treat any other person in your life. I think it is too easy to fall into the trap of taking another person for granted, and we often treat our friends better than we treat our family.

As to what I hope to gain from this sub- I'm most hoping to be regularly reminded of aspects of femininity that most contribute to a happy marriage. Each week I have tried to focus on one particular feature that I have read about on RPW. For example this week I've been making sure a hot dinner is ready for my SO when he arrives home from work. I think I need the most practice in deeply listening to my SO. I am easily distracted and he takes time to say what he means.

Thanks so much again for your reply, and I hope that's a reasonable answer! :)

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet 6 points6 points6 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

First off, tis more than a reasonable answer haha. I promise it wasn't a quiz and I didn't have any secret agenda. I just like feeling a sense of who people are in this community, we are all people after all and it's nice to humanize the online usernames when possible.

I've also been most influenced by a number of threads that have discussed treating your SO as a "guest" and treating your SO better than you treat any other person in your life.

Funny you should mention that, I just saw in a comment or somewhere referencing that post and it really gave me pause to evaluate in what ways I extend more courtesy to strangers than I do my man. I say in what ways because I know on the whole I have made great strides, but perhaps it's a simple as being slower to grab a swinging door. Nothing crazy but worth evaluating and improving when you can.

Have you read Laura Doyle's 'Surrendered Wife'? I've actually only read 'The Surrendered Single'. I own the second one but haven't gotten around to it yet. I actually today started reading the book recommended by /u/Kittenkajira and I can say I'm already obsessed. The first 2-3 chapters I've read have already resonated with me so much and put words to some really abstract biological dynamics that are easy to miss. I know I haven't read enough yet to give it a full review lol, but I still highly recommend it to you. It's really easy to love (clearly).

[–]eliza_schuyler7 points 10 years ago [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet 6 points6 points6 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler6 points 10 years ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet6 points 10 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Kittenkajira 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler6 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Kittenkajira 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler5 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Kittenkajira 4 points5 points6 points 10 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet 6 points6 points6 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler 6 points6 points6 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet5 points 10 years ago [recovered] (12 children) | Copy Link

It's a simple question haha. I have a friend who just got married. Her and her SO are amazing and have been together some 8 years, so this is no shotgun wedding.

But they announced their engagement the second week of Feb and got married the last week of March. So it was like a 5-6 week engagement.

Now from the pictures, it seems like they really did the full schabang, and it didn't seem hastily thrown together. Do Aussie's have shorter engagement periods? My initial thought for that, and why it wouldn't be weird, is that in the US the wedding industry is a particularly violent commercialized machine. Because of this, we play by its rules. But without that machine, well let's just say it wouldn't take me 12-18 months to throw a good party lol, which is how long many engagements last.

So is it just a culture difference that it's shorter? Or did they either rush or announce late or something?

[–]eliza_schuyler 6 points6 points6 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet 6 points6 points6 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Woah! Okay I learned something I totally didn't expect to. So you can't just elope on a moment's notice?? How odd!

And well it sounds like your standard times are on par with ours. And I mean, I'm gauging her wedding from a FB pictures perspective, but she's a really admirable woman entirely and everything seemed so much better done given the timeline than I feel it could be done in the US with the same notice.

I should admit this is all wonderfully irrelevant to me. I know I want a small and inexpensive wedding, but I don't mind waiting the extra time to accommodate out-of-country family travelers. I was just so puzzled as to how a full blown wedding could be started and finished in that short of a time! Even more irrelevant, but she looked beyond stunning lol. I can't imagine even finding a dress that fast.

[–]eliza_schuyler 4 points4 points4 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet5 points 10 years ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler5 points 10 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet5 points 10 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler3 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Kittenkajira 4 points5 points6 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]BeautifulSpaceCadet5 points 10 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler3 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler4 points 10 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Kittenkajira 4 points5 points6 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler 5 points5 points5 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]cakeforallofyou 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler5 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]whitebunny87 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler2 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]_wingnut_ 4 points5 points6 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler1 point 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]eliza_schuyler1 point 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]PhantomDream09 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler2 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]tintedlipbalm 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler1 point 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]aZombieKitten 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler1 point 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]littleteafox 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]eliza_schuyler1 point 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link