RPWi weekly reflection 6/27/16

Camille11325 · 2016-06-28T01:13:09+00:00

So I've never done one of these reflections before, thanks for posting it for us CQ! Everything has been good for M and I we are still adjusting post flood and there have been a lot of set backs, but we have persevered and are quite happy with where we are right now. I've taken on a larger role in managing our house since there is so much that needs to get done and its better if it's not all on Ms shoulders. It's pretty fun yelling at people on the phone when they mess up on deliveries (how do two different couches get damaged two different times?!).

I mentioned that I'll be posting a guide to being a great RPW in times of high stress or crisis - that is still happening but I want to actually be out of crisis mode long enough to have some real perspective. In terms of other posts, I've been busy but when I do have time to write I get SO EXCITED about all these different ideas both for new posts and things I was ready to submit. So I end up rewriting a lot and taking apart things I've worked on so that I can go in a different direction. I still plan on adding to the dominance/dynamics theory and the makeup/beauty series just give me some time :)

Sunhappy_DC · 2016-06-28T01:29:28+00:00

I'm okay. Still working on the positivity challenge for myself so I won't get into any negatives lol.

I hope to chill this long weekend and start using my planner :3

whistling_dixie · 2016-06-28T02:28:43+00:00

Good: I finally verified all the info I needed for my DAR application, confirmed all the records I needed were available, and requested them. Now I'm just waiting for them to finish rolling in to submit my application! I'm very excited. :)

Bad: So last week I was so excited that my boss was coming back from maternity leave - I'm not so excited anymore. Her being back means a lot more work now that she's catching up on things, and I am about to head into a nightmarish cluster of hearings that I am already having stress dreams over.

Ugly: I am not doing so hot at the positivity challenge. I cracked and started to crumble on Saturday morning because of my stress dreams, my grandfather's failing health (he and my mother went to pick out his plot at the military cemetery on Friday), and other miscellaneous stupid things that have just rolling in one after the other. Having a hard time focusing on much else, so I have basically thrown myself full-force into hyper-organizing my DAR application materials (I have a spreadsheet of what documents have been requested, when they were requested, and a checkoff column for once they're received, and I'm creating an index for all of the documents to be included with my application - and this is not even necessary at all, but I am planning to organize them into an Adobe Acrobat book complete with footers labeling them to match the table of contents just for my own reference and because I really like organizing things) and helping my fiance work on our teardrop camper design and build.

FeminineNotFeminist · 2016-06-28T17:09:49+00:00

I've been dreading this post, it's really hard to say.

Sober, I'm on my A game. But it's come to my attention over the last two weeks that I am struggling with alcohol in a big and serious way, and it's time for me to make significant changes in my life. Last weekend, I drunkenly told K that he doesn't love me the way I need to be loved, just like a stranger passing on the sidewalk. He told me this the next morning. This is completely absurd to me because there's not even a fraction of a piece of my heart that feels this way. I was shocked and appalled that I said something like that to him- especially because it's so far removed from how I actually feel.

This last weekend, I drunkenly made snide remarks about a guy at the bar loud enough for him to hear. K told me that I was embarrassing him, and we left.

The next morning, Sunday, we had a very sobering conversation (heh heh). He told me that when I'm sober, I'm such a kind and soft and beautiful person, but that when I drink there's a nastiness that comes out of me that he doesn't understand. He told me he felt like he'd let me down as my leader by letting things get to this point without saying anything. That was the first time he'd ever referred to himself as my leader, and with as much pain as I had in my heart during that conversation, that remark was really special for me.

I can't follow him drunk. And I can't control my drinking. Therefore, it's time to begin the rough road to sobriety. Today is day 3, and Tuesday nights I usually go out for a couple drinks with a friend so today will be my first real test. I'm feeling positive for the future, though.

am3liia · 2016-06-29T11:28:38+00:00

We went to a wedding out of state this weekend and had a really nice time! We liked/disliked the same things about the wedding, which is nice because we're planning ours at the moment. He met a lot of my old friends, and it was just a nice little trip for us.

Buuut I forgot to pack an important medication for my fiance! He was upset I didn't double check for it, said we may have to go home early, I cried, it was bad. But, I ended up calling the doctor who called in the rx to a local pharmacy - so I was able to fix the issue! We talked about ways to make sure it doesn't happen again.

elegance_ · 2016-06-28T05:04:55+00:00

Bad: My anxiety levels are going through the roof and I currently don't feel in a safe place, mentally. I'm trying to focus on self-care, but it is hard since my anxiety is heavily linked to human relationships. I don't want to turn completely inward.

Possibly ugly: I found out that my SO has visited OKCupid. It popped up as one of his visited sites on his homepage when we were looking up furniture for our apartment. (Just to point out that no snooping was involved.) I did not ask about it at first because I wasn't sure what it was. So I said nothing, looked it up afterwards and discovered that it's a dating site ... I don't know what to do from here, honestly. And it's making my anxiety about ten times worse. Apart from that fact, the relationship has been smooth sailing and we are always very loving towards each other, so WTF?

Good: I haven't visibly or audibly freaked out. I am still working on myself to become a better person.

Tryin2BeBetrThanB4 · 2016-06-28T00:31:07+00:00

It's been mostly just ugly here. My UC (edit: ulcerative colitis) decided it wanted to flare up and I've been in pain for the past week, been to my doc, the ER, and on a bunch of medicine that seems to be working, but veeeerrryyy slowly. >.<

On the good side, I'm still trying to work on being a "goddess of fun and light". While not easy, in this state, I've found little ways to do what I can and keep me and my husband happy, even though he's mostly taking care of me. I'm trying really hard to keep light-hearted despite pain, and it's been going well. I hate burdening him with this, but I still am trying to do as much as I possibly can. And all the cuddles are nice.

Title	RPWi weekly reflection 6/27/16
Author	CoochQuarantine
Upvotes	8
Comments	16
Date	June 28, 2016 12:18 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWives
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/comments/4q6krv/rpwi_weekly_reflection_62716/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWives/rpwi-weekly-reflection-62716.209875 https://theredarchive.com/post/209875

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