Getting too comfortable?

stacysmom40 · 2018-06-13T23:59:17+00:00

When did you even buy the granny panties? Comfort clothes are like garbage snack foods. If you don’t want to use them, don’t buy them?

JackSkell0255 · 2018-06-13T23:25:36+00:00

If you're getting too comfortable, it may mean that it's time to consider self-improvement in some way, like more school, job training, or fitness goals.

I'm old, but I advise people to move thru life like a shark: if you're not moving forward, you're dying.

okayestwifey · 2018-06-14T01:04:49+00:00

Try to think of yourself as his lover or girlfriend, even after you've been together for a long time. It's easy and fun to do things like waxing, makeup, etc. when you're first dating and you're trying to impress them, but it's appreciated forever. Even though we've been together for 10+ years, and it would be soooo easy to just go into "Mom" mode, when I think of myself as his lover, and see myself in a sexual way, it's much less tempting to granny panty it up.

subgirl182 · 2018-06-14T10:52:18+00:00

If, like me,you surrender to your hubby sexually, you pretty much need to look good ALL the gosh darn time lol. I need to feel sexy to be in the mood, that means exercising most days, eating well, waxing, shaving, make up, hair, underwear, etc every day! If I don't feel sexy, I won't be into it and hubby doesn't want that, he likes seeing me enjoy myself ;) x

KittenLoves_ · 2018-06-14T05:38:25+00:00

If the reason you have granny panties are period-related, do what I do: toss those ugly things out, and use your old-but-still-cute underwear as the new period panties.

Obviously you should become more comfortable around each other as time goes on, but don't mistake "it's okay if I don't always wear makeup when I'm just lounging around the house" with "I'm going to start dressing like a slob, forgoing showers, skipping wax appointments, and not doing my hair". Plus -- unless you were already in the habit of looking/acting slobbish before, I'm not sure why you would suddenly fall into these habits.

aftertheafter-party · 2018-06-14T03:40:59+00:00

Copy-pasting from my comment on a very similar recent post...

In terms of "politeness," like "please & thank-you" variety -- I ALWAYS say please, thank you, excuse me, & so on to my husband.

My mother taught me, "Treat your family like friends & your friends like family." To me this means:

You should be on your "best behavior" with your family; they are the ones who will be there for you regardless, so treat them like gold
It's easy to "drop" adherence to "rules" around social norms when you are around people 24/7; keep in mind, you are defining their "home life," so you have the opportunity to make their experience incredibly loving & special (or pins-&-needles & terrifying - on the opposite end of the spectrum)
Your friends should feel "at home" when they visit
Visitors shouldn't feel like they need to be "on their best behavior" or "ask permission" when they come over

In my relationship, I don't mind about "looks" very much (hair/makeup), except I do avoid "bad nudity" (unflattering angles / positions / activities); I love to be naked, so this is actually a "thing" for me. I also don't wear anything ratty/sloppy, unless I'm completely alone & doing "gross" chores (I literally pretend I am a man when I do this, as it eases my energetic burden).

I feel the most important thing to mind is smell. Smell is one of the most important senses in building / triggering memory, so I make sure to brush my teeth at least twice a day, shower daily... I wear special perfumes for special occasions... I wash my hair about 2x/week, but I oil it with scented oils in between or rinse with a conditioner if I've had a particularly intense workout or adventure.

candara65071 · 2018-06-13T23:32:46+00:00

Make sure you are doing things outside of the home. Formal dates: ie dinner and an art gallery, or some kind of event for which you will want to look your best :)

BewareTheOldMan · 2018-06-14T10:58:22+00:00

"How do you avoid getting too comfortable around your SO?"

Bigger question - why would you allow it?

Men notice when women "fall off" on their appearance and in other areas of the relationship - women notice when men are slacking as well. It's not a good look for either gender.

Whether he says it or not, men notice and it reflects that he's not "worth the effort."

It makes little sense to exert more effort and energy to look good for folks at the office and the general population versus your SO...who has much more importance to your life.

Had a one-time conversation with a female family member about this subject a long while back - she stated "her mama always said to make sure to look good for her man versus these dudes in the streets." I suppose she didn't mean literally "made up" 24 hours a day, but a presentable, nice effort to show your man that you care about routine presentation.

Story Time - my former spouse let her general appearance and weight lapse to the point that it was unsatisfactory and I had words with her on the matter. She of course did not like it, but I insisted her behavior was problematic. I had no intention of divorcing my wife for what is essentially a minor, easily correctable issue. However the lack of effort toward improving her appearance manifested elsewhere as substandard behavior in other areas of the marriage, resulting in general failure toward fulfilling wife/mother duties to my expectations. This was unacceptable. After failure to self-correct for the benefit of re-solidifying the marital union, she was summarily dismissed via divorce. Notably - weight gain was NOT the issue, but one of MANY issues.

Even more offensive is that post-divorce she managed to "magically" lose weight...at least long enough to attract attention from other men. Although she regained the lost weight and even more, the fact she had zero interest in appealing to her husband during the marriage was a direct insult and overt disrespect. Since her husband was not "worth the effort" in so many areas (of marriage) and she demonstrated little effort toward improvement, I saw no reason to maintain her as a wife.

Moral/Takeaway - don't be that woman.

LittleMissAfrodite · 2018-06-14T17:55:01+00:00

How would you feel if your husband started getting lazy at work?

You make time and put effort into things that are important to you. If being a good spouse is important to you then put in the time. I think about how much of an impact it has on my Captain. How few fights we have, how much he smiles, how much he showers me with affection. He may not say it but he appreciates everything I do and I don't want to lose that.

That keeps me in top shape. Otherwise you open yourself up to negativity from yourself and him.

blushdot · 2018-06-18T02:19:53+00:00

Comfortable doesn't have to mean dowdy.

Instead of wearing granny panties, choose cotton bikini panties with a cute print or feminine accent.
Instead of going bare faced, wear bb cream and mascara.
Instead of doing your hair, figure out a few simple hairstyles. A side-pony that is braided or a floral hair clip, for instance.
Schedule beauty maintenance into your calendar.

Title	Getting too comfortable?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	20
Comments	12
Date	June 13, 2018 9:04 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/8qw1hw/getting_too_comfortable/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/getting-too-comfortable.67391 https://theredarchive.com/post/67391

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