Hypergamy Self-Awareness?

FleetingWish · 2013-09-23T23:27:59+00:00

First of all, understand that knowing about hypergamy, doesn't mean we have control over it. That would be like saying that a man who realizes he's only attracted to thin women, can understand that conciousness and decide to be attracted to fat women. It will not go away, just like your attraction to fit women will not go away. It's not a choice for us, and being aware of it doesn't make it any less of a choice.

We can't change the fact that we are attracted to men who we feel are our superiors. The amount of feminist indoctination we got determines our ability to see certain men as our superiors or not. More feminist women have a tendancy to see themselves as superior to more men. Also the same with career oriented women.

As RPW what we can do with the knowledge is realize that we have to have realistic expectations, and the more unrealistic our expectations are, the harder we have to work for it. See in order for us to have happy long term relationships, we have to aim for men higher on the food chain than us, and in order to do that we have to put effort into ourselves and our attitudes. That's really what being a RPW means.

crankypants15 · 2013-09-24T01:08:25+00:00

i have never experience a hypergamy itch in any of my relationships because every man i have had a relationship with has been the higher value partner. i think hypergamy is overstated in the manosphere because most men are on the beta end of things and have likely been the lower value partner in their past relationships for whatever reason (looks, money, dominance).

women wanting to trade up for status is no different than a man wanting to trade up for looks/youth.

juswannabeanony · 2013-09-24T01:21:02+00:00

I'm aware of my "hypergamy" in that I'm fully cognizant of the fact that I strongly desire the highest value partner I can get. I don't think it's a negative thing and I think most people, men included, are this way. What guy doesn't want to be with the highest value woman who will have him?

sugarcrush · 2013-09-24T01:51:17+00:00

One of the more bitter parts of trp for me was realizing how "hypergamous" (is that a word?) I was. It hurts to fit a stereotype that men talk about negatively. But I've accepted it now. I can't change it, so I seek to limit its control over me.

I definitely think one of the reasons I am so wildly attracted to my husband is because I see him as better than me in pretty much every way. Smarter, more attractive, higher earning career path, etc. I used to be super nervous that people would see us and think he could do better, or that he would leave me for a prettier girl. I'm (mostly) over it now...

Additionally, I don't hang out with guys one on one. Can't be tempted if the temptations not there!

LifterofThings · 2013-09-24T14:32:10+00:00

I've never been affected by hypergamy either, to my knowledge. I honestly don't really know why... I think part of it is low self-esteem, and part of it is that I was brought up to believe that there is no "the one" out there, that relationships require work, and that adults honor their commitments.

ZubMessiah · 2013-09-24T03:01:20+00:00

I don't give a darn about "status". I care about stability and security This includes

Psychological Stability

emotional stability

Financial Stability

I want a man that I can count on to be a good husband, father, and provider.

Whether or not this is hypergamous, in my personal situation, I do not know. I would like to think I am good enough for such a man.

But even if I wasn't "good enough" (again, I do not know how to define whether or not I am good enough), I would only want a man with those characteristics. Even if it means dying alone. There's no way I am going to make my life a messy whirlwind of emotional/ financial stress when I would be better off single.

EDIT: formatting

SashaFinch · 2013-09-24T00:23:44+00:00

Knowing about hypergamy doesn't make it go away, but it does keep me from throwing away my relationship because "I DESERVE to be haaaappy." I still get the attraction to high status men but I am able to say that's just hypergamy speaking and not dwell on it too much.

Title	Hypergamy Self-Awareness?
Author	jazida
Upvotes	15
Comments	36
Date	September 23, 2013 11:04 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1mzqq1/hypergamy_selfawareness/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/hypergamy-self-awareness.83997 https://theredarchive.com/post/83997

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