For the past three months, I've been living a no cheap thrills lifestyle.

I've given up drinking. I've been selling my old wardrobe filled with not so flattering clothes. I've stopped going to parties. I deleted every guy's phone number from my phone except my brother's and father's. I ended contact with a guy who I almost became a plate to. I've been cursing less. I've also been trying to better myself by surrounding myself by women who have similar values than mine. I stopped hanging out with my old group of friends who love smoking weed, drinking, and hooking up with guys.

I don't have a Tinder or an OkCupid or any form of online dating because most of that lends itself to attention whoring and immediate gratification especially since I'm 19.

In the last three months, I've given myself an opportunity to work from ground zero. I haven't really gone on dates because this has been my "me time". In the past, I used to go on a ton of dates aimlessly, because let's face it, I loved the attention.

During this journey, I've learned a lot of things.

  1. Getting motivated is tough but the important thing is to have a routine or to create one. Instead of having weekly goals or even monthly goals, I have daily goals which I can meet.

  2. I stopped making lists of things to do and just did them as I thought about it. I realized lists were not working for me because even though they keep me organized, there's a dread that comes from knowing that you have to do X, Y, and Z.

  3. Progress is progress, regardless of how little. In the beginning, it's easy to be very critical about how much progress you've been making but really you've just become more self-aware and conscious about what you need to improve on. Keep on improving.

  4. People will notice your change. Some of them won't like it. This is GOOD. My non-RP friends give me crap for going to the gym and getting my life together. They nag and complain but really the only reason they're mad is because I'm not spending time with them. I'm glad they complain about my self-improvement because it means 2 things: 1) I'm improving 2) The people who complain about me are the exact people who I wouldn't want to surround myself by. With that knowledge, I can filter them out.

  5. There are always more things you can do and change. I used to love routines but honestly, I've accepted change more. Change can be a good thing.

  6. The hardest part about living a no cheap thrills lifestyle is not giving up alcohol and sex but figuring out what you're going to do when you stop doing those things. It means finding new things to do. It means learning hobbies and having a new skill set.

  7. I know more about the man I want because I know more about the woman I can be.

  8. You realize things are changing when your needs and wants change. Guys and going out to parties used to be on my mind all the time. I don't really care about those things anymore but I do want a boyfriend/eventually a husband and I want to set myself up for that.