I’m 36, married (10 years) with 4 kids.

I was a an emotionally dependent simp. I’ve been breaking out of that since around the beginning of the year. Things were going really well until recently. Now my wife is resisting the change more. I started working out of town a few months ago, traveling back for a week here and a weekend there.

This week has been harder. We fought before I left and she didn’t want to make up (I almost always have to initiate but didn’t this time). I barely called or texted her and she did the same back. Late last week I booked a flight home for tomorrow (I need to see my kids at least). I called her today to tell her and she didn’t answer. A few minutes later get a notification that someone rang my doorbell (back at the house where my wife is) and I check the camera. It’s a neighborhood kid looking for my son. His siblings and father are there (I haven’t met him, my wife has but barely knows him). She invited him and the kids jn (my kids are home btw). He said no but she insisted so he goes in. She knows this is unacceptable to me.

They came out 5 minutes later and she had given him some food to take home. Obviously nothing happened. I am 100% sure that she has no interest in him but knew I would see and is trying to get an emotional reaction out of me. She knows

No matter what I decide to do I will not give her the satisfaction of seeing me upset/angry. So I wanted to see if anyone here has some good advice with how to handle this. I have come up with the following 3 options:

  1. Pretend I didn’t see anything.

  2. Go home tomorrow and confront her (calmly).

  3. Cancel my flight and confront her over the phone.

I am open to other options or opinions on the ones provided.

Thank you.