Am i falling into a beta trap?

thisisscaringme · 2017-05-03T18:05:16+00:00

You've taken her bait hook, line and sinker if you really believe what you just wrote.

Let her go. She's been gaming you from the start and she's gaming you now. You had your turn, go find a replacement.

You've already ruined any shot with her, and I can guarantee she doesn't view you as an alpha because you don't behave like one.

RedPillStoryTime · 2017-05-03T18:57:16+00:00

Just going to be real with you...

Get your head out of your ass. If you're going to college in September, why in the hell would you want a LDR going into year 1? There are literally good looking girls EVERYWHERE on campus, parties every weekend, with ample opportunities to meet people every single day. I went to a University with less than 10,000 people and there were always good looking girls around.

Let's pretend for a moment that you managed to save this trainwreck situation with your Beta path. Let's take it even a step further and assume you pulled off a miracle by keeping things going until September....

*You'd be in a LDR,

*You'd be that guy sitting in the corner at parties because you've put her ass on a pedestal.

*You'd be even more Beta by that point

*She would 100% be getting slammed by Mr.Thundercock back home

*You'll be having a nightly hand party thinking about that HB9 that eye fucked you in your class, while your neighbour is slamming her.

What I'm saying is that girl probably did you the biggest favour imaginable by breaking things off with you my man.

It took me almost a year to get someone this good and it will probably be a while before (if) it happens again.

That's not the mentality of a fucking Alpha. Be the best version of you that you can be.

*Go to the gym tonight

*Grow some balls

*Take her ass off the pedestal

*Make immediate plans to hangout with your buddies and enjoy the last few months of high school

*Thank me in September when you're having the time of your life.

u/RedPillStoryTime out Edit: Formatting

ideal_lemon · 2017-05-03T18:54:53+00:00

brother, i'm no redpill expert, but let me tell you something you want to hear.

go ahead and try to "convince" her by "explaining your feelings" towards her. sometimes you just have to make the mistake and fall, then you'll learn. just be prepared to fall flat on your face and be prepare to swallow the pill again.

the main redpill rule is that you can't "convince" someone to feel attraction towards you. if she was attracted to you she would have found a million clever ways to not allow you to slip away from her. just imagine how she would act if you were brad pitt (or whoever girls are attracted to these days).

EmpatheticBankRobber · 2017-05-03T18:30:51+00:00

She ended it because she didn't think i liked her as much as she liked me (this happened after i didn't text her for like 5 days)

You engineered the situation for this outcome, and now you're upset about it? If you push people away, they will leave.

Mail_Order_Lutefisk · 2017-05-03T18:07:53+00:00

To answer your question in the title, yes you are. You need to develop abundance mentality.

MattyAnon · 2017-05-03T22:13:24+00:00

never had a boyfriend before

So she's only had one night stands?

She ended it because she didn't think i liked her as much as she liked me (this happened after i didn't text her for like 5 days) and she didn't want to get more attached then have it end.

Didn't text her or didn't reply? If didn't reply for 5 days I can see her point. If you didn't initiate for 5 days, this is a deal breaker because she should text you rather than end things.

I'm now battling with whether to express that i really like her and want to be with her or not

Ah.. there it is.... one-itis.

. In her eyes I've been an alpha basically the whole time she has known me, so this would be beta but you cant just never say how you feel right?

Nah, you haven't been the hot alpha of her dreams. Snap to your senses and look at her actions, not her words.

but i can't help but think she really might be close to the best i can do.

Don't force scarcity on yourself.

Finding all those qualities in someone mixed with them being very attracted to me won't be easy. To me it would be depressing to go back to gaming mostly boring or less attractive girls when she is right there.

If she's available and it's awesome then be with her while it's easy and awesome. When she's 4 hours away she's a FWB.

It took me almost a year to get someone this good and it will probably be a while before (if) it happens again.

It's not just the girl that has to be good.... it's also the situation and the relationship.

If i show my emotions and it doesnt work t

NEVER show your emotions.

First of all, TRP has helped me a ton with getting over a 2 year relationship

Yeah, you've got a little way to go. Don't use TRP to get yourself a sucky monogamous deal.

Auphor_Phaksache · 2017-05-03T18:14:43+00:00

Stop using women to validate yourself. You want a hot girl to parade around your friends when really you could probably pull an 8 for a quick lay but you're a scary ass biotch.

alefmale · 2017-05-03T19:48:40+00:00

I can honestly say I don't know. Long distance relationships are very difficult for any amount of time. To be honest it definitely sounds like you've fallen for her and you've just been trying to follow a certain kind of behavior pattern that's advised in a lot of the threads here.

I'm now battling with whether to express that i really like her and want to be with her or not.

Express whatever you want to express. But what does "want to be with her" mean exactly? It does in a way sound like you are afraid of losing her. And if there's one thing we all can probably agree on it's that fear has no place in a man's relationships.

Flatlamb · 2017-05-03T23:19:08+00:00

9/10(without makeup) and never been with anyone else; cmon dude, do you REALLY believe that?

Barvazon · 2017-05-03T21:26:52+00:00

The fuck is this gay threads doing here?

OP get your ass to askTRP and start reading sidebar

grow a pair

jesus

hva_vet · Wed May 3 20:16:49 2017 UTC

You have a lot to work to do. You really need to work on your abundance and IDGAF. You didn't text her for five days and she dropped you. You have your answer where you stand with her and whatever reason she gave you is meaningless. Move on and stop caring.

RPStone · 2017-05-03T20:30:45+00:00

i can't help but think she really might be close to the best i can do.

It took me almost a year to get someone this good and it will probably be a while before (if) it happens again.

Sounds like she's "The One".

You have oneitis bro. The only cure is to fuck other women.

19RomeoQuebec · 2017-05-03T22:53:04+00:00

The funny thing about this post

i might have a chance while remaining more of an alpha in her mind

The key about red pill, is being alpha in your mind. You are not an alpha an even though you will try to mask your beta with alpha. The beta will shine through like a beacon.

Continue reading sidebar material and listen to the advice people are giving you.

Osemka8 · 2017-05-05T07:25:17+00:00

The majority of time I express what I want. Really depends on the situation I'm in, but I don't tolerate missed chances anymore, what would be if I have said what I trully wanted to get. Since that realization, I feel more fullfilled as my needs are met and rejection doesn't hurt at all.

That being said, I am for expressing your wants and needs, desires. You can still be alpha with this, if that's what you want, but you have to pick your words. Honesty in such cases is always the best option. You don't need to be or feel degraded by doing this. She won't have an upper hand on you. You just wouldn't feel sorry later if you acted differently. Hope you understand what I'm trying to say.

By doing this, you are in charge of your life. I do not support emotionless fucks and she isn't doing anything to turn you into a beta or bullshit like this (from what you wrote). If I was her, I would have ended it after a day or two. She stuck around for quite long with such no contact. It showed her you don't care and her actions are justified. If you had expressed your intentions and wants/needs, that would show emotional intelligence, maturity which is a fucking major turn on for chicks. You don't have to do it asap, wait for the right time. If it's too late now, try it later in your life. I wouldn't initiate another contact in a few months. Again, if I was her, I wouldn't want to hear from you or give you another chance. But that is just me and my principles. Just for the record, I value myself highly.

TL;DR: You cannot undo what you did in the past, but you can learn and come to the point where you realize that expressing your desires leads you to never regreting anything.

Askada · 2017-05-05T12:13:21+00:00

Finding all those qualities in someone mixed with them being very attracted to me won't be easy

What the fuck are you even talking about. Meet with 10 girls than come back and say that again.

Classic oneitisus.

SJHammer · 2017-05-03T19:15:55+00:00

Don't waste your time. She will likely cheat. If she doesn't cheat, she will dump you as soon as she meets the first Chad. Women are emotional.And she will explain it like this:

"I felt really lonely"
"I wish it was you"
"I was hurting"
"I need someone that isnt too busy"
"We've just grown apart"
"I'm just trying to figure out who I am"
"I needed someone and you werent there"
"I needed someone and you weren't answering"
"I just felt like you didnt want me"
"I something something something something"

I had an LDR once, and I didnt care if she stopped wanting me. She was a rebound to my oneitus. Thats the only thing that kept it going. I didn't have oneitus for her but I kept giving her the idea it might work because I still gave her attention. And she was from a tiny ass town in the middle of nowhere. I had very little local competition in her area. When she mentioned other guys, it didnt bother me, I even supported it. Told her to find someone else. It made her mad and she wanted me more. Did I realize what I was doing, absolutely not. And thats why it was so effective. It was genuine.

Downhere_Seeds · 2017-05-03T21:02:07+00:00

Stop and think about this for a second

She ended it because she didn't think i liked her as much as she liked me

Now think about what you know about hypergamy and ask yourself if this really makes sense? Would a woman do this if she really liked you?

My guess is she has a beta orbiter paying her a lot more attention and she has decided to take the easier road. It won't last.

What you should do: be cool with her, but cut off all contact with her. Don't call her, don't text, nothing. If she calls or texts you, wait a day or 2 to respond and play it cool and let her work her way back into your life or not, that's up to you.

EDIT: Definitely don't talk to her about how you feel about her and shit, the only feelings you can describe to her are: you like when she does _____

villewill19 · 2017-05-03T21:03:05+00:00

Gotta be honest my man would not suggest getting in to a long distance relationship, that's just not something that you really want to do. On the other hand, gotta say that you should ignore a lot of these comments about putting her on a pedestal. Sometimes you meet a woman that you vibe with on a deeper level and that's totally cool. Maybe you fucked it up a little though by not telling her you were as in to her as you were. If I were you I would for sure try to keep contact but keep your options open for the time being, maybe trying to meet up with her here and there if you have the chance. You just have to accept that both of you all will probably be playing the field, but don't be a little bitch and act like you can't handle the fact. If you play your cards right, the whole time she'll just be wanting you, something about wanting what you can't have. Once you all are able to live by each other again, go for it if she's someone you really are in to. Just always keep your guard up and be a strong man, usual advice blah blah blah. And by the way, this must be a real shock to the people who read this page a lot, but all women have different types, and if this site wasn't for people who have had trouble with girls most of their lives they would understand that, not every woman wants an asshole. But nice guys do usually finish last.

BurnYourFlag · 2017-05-04T02:03:22+00:00

Focus on your school and networking to get a good job when u get out of college. She is not the best girl in the universe. get over her. Date other women and fuck some hose, while you ignore her the whole time she is away. Hit her up after she comes back and fuck her. Date her again or make her a plate.

Spoopsnloops · 2017-05-04T04:02:38+00:00

You said two different things:

A:

She ended it because she didn't think i liked her as much as she liked me (this happened after i didn't text her for like 5 days) and she didn't want to get more attached then have it end.

and B:

When she said she didnt think it would work i tried to convince her a bit but i ended it saying thats too bad and told her to take care.

Which is it? Is it that she doesn't think you like her as much as she does you because you weren't talking to her, or is it that she doesn't like you as much as she claimed despite you trying to convince her of stuff?

If she likes you a lot, then talking to her and telling her you'd like to be with her should do the trick. If it didn't, then maybe there's something else that isn't being explained.

It's difficult to offer advice if the story has conflicting elements to it. If she likes you a lot, then it should be easy to get into a relationship with her.

pongpong123able · 2017-05-04T12:15:33+00:00

A 9/10 who hasnt been dicked by anyone yet, and she won't let you treat her like a plate even when she likes you. That is a fucking unicorn

newName543456 · 2017-05-04T19:34:07+00:00

I know advice is always to move on, improve yourself, and game other girls but i can't help but think she really might be close to the best i can do.

Your abundance mentality is clearly lacking.

brokenmess · 2017-05-04T20:39:50+00:00

IMO extremes never work. You should not bee nor too cold, nor too warm with her. Any crossing of limits into extremes will make her uncomfortable. That's all there is to it. She has to feel comfortable.

Title	Am i falling into a beta trap?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	36
Comments	60
Date	May 3, 2017 5:50 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/691y8m/am_i_falling_into_a_beta_trap/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/am-i-falling-into-a-beta-trap.43004 https://theredarchive.com/post/43004

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