This will probs get buried but whatever...

So I met a 7/10 at a club 6 months ago.

We hit it off great, danced, flirted, drank, and she wanted to leave with me. I was on a "business trip" with no decent accomodations so I suggest we go to her place. It works. We get there, fool around and things heated up straight to "home plate" except I didn't have a condom (fail) and neither of us wanted to risk it. We decide to finish each other off and go to bed. Next morning she puts her number in my phone.

I see her one more time in the next two weeks and return to my corner of the country. We stay in touch, she wanted to see me again so I drive 1200kms to try things again (slight oneitus had developed). I spend the whole trip at her place, we fool around but when things heat up she talks about her ex. She says she can't fuk because she still thinks bout him, and it's not fair to me etc. I buy it, wait til the last day to try again and she gives me head the morning I leave.

A month goes by, we talked more but pressure with her personal life and Uni contributes to her needing "space". She asks how I feel bout this, oneitus set in good by this point so I tell her it sucks because we got along so well had a strong connection etc. I finish the call by dropping the L bomb. She doesn't reciprocate and practises a month or two of silence.

She breaks the silence by talking bout her ex and needing advise on how to deal with him being toxic etc. I give her objective advise that anyone she considers toxic should be given distance and cut from her life. This fits with advise her friends gave her and she listens. We continue talking off and on for another month and she starts saying she misses me and we had a great time together, were happy when I visited last and wants to see me again etc. I was a bit cautious by her flip flopping so I agreed with her but didn't express any of my own feelings towards her (tried to avoid validating her).

Another month goes by and I start to suggest I make another visit. We plan it out over another month or so and then I make the trip to visit again. We reconnect, get along similarly to the last time and things look alright. I invite her to stay the night with me and she was unsure/indecisive but agrees eventually.

She opens up about some mental health issues she's been having but seeking help. Talks about a stalker/creeper that tried very hard vying for her attention and eventually trning out to be harassing in nature, restraining order needing to be established etc. Compares that guy to me because travelling 1200 kms to see her is "alot"and is unsure for and describes herself as indecisive and not wanting to waste my time leading me on etc. I suggest it being a waste if we don't pursue this connection for fear of what negative results could unfold. She dumps the rest of her purse on me and then we head to bed.

We spoon etc. She seems restless and I see her brushing her hair behind her ear and thought "fuk it" I'm gonna see if she wants to make out etc. Since she didn't seem to be tired. She reciprocates, it keeps heating up but then she stops and asks "if I just wanted her to stay so we could make out" I replied with "I wanted to be intimate with you" she starts crying quietly and apologizes. I tell her why I started kissing her, she says it's not about that. She said it's because she's afraid to start something with me because of her past experiences. I try to soothe her from being upset, and say if she only focuses on the negative then she won't be able to see the positive. Continually thinking negative will perpetuate her anxiety/depression because she won't be able to see the good things in life etc. She falls asleep finally.

Crisis slightly averted but I'm confused. I want to pursue things with her because when she isn't throwing curve balls like that I enjoy her company and I'm happy to be there for her and am happy with her. I also want to be intimate with her but don't want to overstep her boundaries. I want my needs to be met but still respect her.

TLDR: Off and on relationship for 6 months, trying to balance respect for her and my sexual needs. My morals (oneitus) are telling me to be faithful to her but I'm not getting laid and it's getting frustrating.

Update: I stayed another day to try my luck once more. Got to the point of LMR and tried powering through it, to more resistance. I called her out on her being selfish and hopped off. She got in a huff, I ignored her, til she asked if I wanted her there. I said if it were up to me you wouldn't be feeling that way. She disagreed, then got up and called her friend to go home. Next day she said she couldn't follow through on plans we had, I said Alright, she asked if that's it/all I had to say, I told her it's her loss. Haven't spoke to her since. She's asked me for pictures I took of her with her friends dog and I've not replied.

Thanks for the advice fellas, I'll be visiting the sidebar for a bit this week and trying tinder after for a field test.