I'm done chasing after Her

MrGreySD · 2018-02-15T15:04:47+00:00

Your oneitis levels are through the roof, as you know. Never let yourself get like this in the future. Always have abundance mentality. You say how special she is yet she's posting snapchat stories about loser exes sending her gifts. She isn't special. You'll realise that.

On that note, STOP looking at people's stories on Snapchat. It's a waste of life and screams orbiter. Uninstall that shit. Work on yourself. Lift. Grow. Soak up RP. Fuck bitches. It won't happen overnight but it is insane what can be accomplished in just one year of our lives.

HumanSockPuppet · 2018-02-15T15:46:10+00:00

Maybe in a year or so when she realizes what a sack of potatoes that kid is, she'll wake the fuck up.

Don't let yourself enter into this dangerous mindset, because it is still a prison.

Do not make winning her over the end goal of your apotheosis. Because then it will all still be about her, and you will have learned nothing. Your journey to emotional self-sufficiency begins and ends with you.

Despite that, I must say, I'm way too close with her to sever the bond completely.

If you cannot cast her away at will, then you are her slave. No one should command so much hold over you that you cannot cut them loose.

Your oneitis is so strong that you need to let her go so that you can begin making actual progress. Ultimately the choice is yours, but don't say that you weren't warned.

sadomasochrist · 2018-02-15T15:07:46+00:00

Flair as blue pill example. You've become self aware, realise lots of men never reach the point you're at.

Bambam22bam · 2018-02-15T15:45:42+00:00

She's the only girl I've met in my life that has actual ambition. It turns me on how smart she is. Fact is, I've been in love with her from the moment I set my eyes on her: I could tell from the start that she was different, that she was special.

You'll have a laugh about this sentiment when you turn 30, if you even remember it at all. You're right to focus on yourself. When you do, sex will just come. It's a natural byproduct.

Sengos · 2018-02-15T15:06:24+00:00

Well I'm glad you recognized that you are beginning to drop the facade.

You still have a ways to go.

As "wonderful" of a friend you believe her to be, you have feelings for her, or previously did. You have to drop her. For you, specifically. I have nothing against having girls as friends, despite what is said here. I never personally understood not having friends that are girls. How the hell are you supposed to bring girls out and have preselection if you are not at least friends with them? They have to be comfortable around you at least.

This girl though, it's different. You had oneitis for her. It'll be pathological for you to keep her around. So you have to start fresh.

You have a solid discipline base that will carry you farther and farther. Stick with it.

Also, 8 months is nothing. Try years man. I've been on droughts so long you'll wonder how I stayed hydrated. Those streaks strengthen resolve and help you realize that you don't really need anyone. Being alone isn't terrible, being with someone who doesn't respect you is. Maybe it's because I'm past my early 20s and started the later stages of my 20s, but it gets easier to stop giving a shit about "being on droughts" and being alone when I see my skills improve, my paychecks improve, etc. It's more fun to live now. Let that kind of energy pull people in.

Be strong for you and you alone and prioritize your wants and needs over everything. Don't bend for those who wouldn't bend for you.

Self-honest · 2018-02-15T15:45:20+00:00

Cut her out of your life entirely. She doesn't give two shits about you. It may seem like she's your friend, but there is no such thing. What do you do for her? What does she do for you?

Haaaj1 · 2018-02-15T16:06:15+00:00

I know exactly how you feel. I had the same extreme oneitis as you. You need to realize that she is a parasite sucking out all of your energy that you could have spent on other people.

We_Are_Legion · 2018-02-15T16:30:02+00:00

I will admit, though, that she is an amazing friend. She's the only girl I've met in my life that has actual ambition. It turns me on how smart she is. Fact is, I've been in love with her from the moment I set my eyes on her: I could tell from the start that she was different, that she was special. Like, fuck, I could write books about this girl, I HAVE written a book about this girl. I don't even care about the sex, I just want that next level of intimacy.

One day, when you stop having tunnel vision, you will realize that this (and any similar line of thought you have) is delusion.

Your thot is not more special than any other.

MattyAnon · 2018-02-15T17:53:48+00:00

her bar-tard loser ex-boyfriend who borderline sexually assaulted her

Never believe the "my ex abused me" sob story. It's such a common line from women, it's specifically designed to elicit whiteknight/beta/protective behaviours from you. In many cases the only abuse is "he left me". She loved the sex, she loved the emotional rollercoaster, she loves complaining about it, she loves the attention, and she loves that the new boyfriend is admitting how beta he is.

binarynightmare · 2018-02-15T18:49:10+00:00

I could tell from the start that she was different, that she was special. Like, fuck, I could write books about this girl

Interestiiiiing. One paragraph ago you were over her, but that's none of my business.

There is no way anyone who has truly swallowed the pill would actually write a post like this.

My advice: blow this oneitis shit up with a stick of dynamite. Do whatever it takes to make sitting in the same room with her or even responding to another message seem worse than eating glass.

Then use this anger to actually swallow the pill.

Book advice: No More Mr Nice Guy.

^{^{^{^{^}}}} Please, please, please read this.

iamtheonewhomknocks · 2018-02-15T17:55:17+00:00

This is all just cheap talk. Go back to the side bar, cut this person out and for the love of god get off of her Snapchat you orbiting, validating fuck.

Don't post about your plans to "from now on be RP!", come back in 6-12 months with real results and changes in your self and behavior. That and cultivate some mother fucking abundance, my word.

MastodonMoney · 2018-02-15T19:18:49+00:00

Some great advice I received a while back from my father was to fail fast. If you like a chick, you attempt and then either fail or get pussy and move on. I think a lot of people don't realize how short life is and how valuable your time is. You're a fucking monkey stuck in a round green and blue rock floating through space...that's the reality of things. This may sound depressing but realizing how insignificant you are and how unimportant any woman is will allow you to break free from all the overthinking and stupid emotions you feel.

anonymouswan · 2018-02-15T20:27:25+00:00

You are in college. Girls come and go your entire life. You think you found "the one" until the next one comes along. Let's say she dropped everything for you and you guys get married and have babies with a white picket fence. You are in your 20's and your marriage would statistically end in a divorce.

I am about to hit 30 and it's wild seeing all the dumb kids who got married right after high school/college and made tons of babies getting divorced and dealing with drama that I couldn't ever deal with.

You are young and setting your sights on finding "the one" is a waste of time. That doesn't mean you can't commit or date, I spent half my 20s with the same girl and enjoyed it for the most part but we had different end game goals in life so we went our separate ways. Imagine how much bullshit we would have gone through if we got married or had kids.

LeftyGuns88 · 2018-02-15T15:15:24+00:00

You got oneitis, bad. You need to cut ties with her. I was in the same situation so I’m not preaching from a higher place brother, I’ve been there. Patrice O’Neil said it best: Trying to be friends with her is essentially a dishonest relationship. You really want more from her than to be just friends so you’re just biding your time, waiting for her to get tired of the other guy. She probably will get tired of him but she isn’t going to then suddenly see you as a romantic interest, it doesn’t work that way. Men can’t be truly friends with women they are attracted to and deep down you probably know that.

Logically address the fact that she doesn’t see you that way. Not the end of the world and it doesn’t make you or her a bad person or substandard or a loser or anything. Not everyone we are attracted to will be attracted to us back or not as attracted to us as we are to them. Do NOT allow yourself to be pulled into her orbit. The only way out of this for you is to realize that you need to cut her off, meet other women and get back to focusing on things you enjoy doing just for yourself (hobbies, sports, etc). BTW She isn’t different from the other girls. You think that she is but she isn’t. . In time you will see that. You will look back on this and shake your head. Just like I do. I will recommend you read The Rational Male. It will open your eyes, particularly about Oneitis. Good luck and stay strong.

narref91 · 2018-02-15T18:31:40+00:00

There should be a section for the bp post of the month. I nominate this guy.

We don't care how much you lift or how much you meditate. Whenever you feeling like writing a rant like this think twice, exercise some self control. It'll help you in the long run.

LiveAFTSOV · 2018-02-15T17:39:25+00:00

Congratulations for dropping this whore. I am glad youve taken your life into your own hands

blackedoutfast · 2018-02-15T18:14:07+00:00

She's one of my best friends

no, she's your oneitis. people don't write literal books about how much they want their friends. and i'm sure you don't crave this level of intimacy with your male friends.

L0neWolfAlpha · 2018-02-15T18:29:32+00:00

lol this whole rant was so blue pill i cant even... Thanks for the rant but i really don't think you've learned anything. Cant remove her out of your life because you're too invested serious. Women having ambitions lul. Oneitis is strong with this one. Drop her out of your life, go lift, read and ffs stop looking at other peoples snapchats.

TRP_mask · 2018-02-15T18:44:11+00:00

This is kind of where I'm at. I'm slowly becoming more self aware and I'm slowly starting to see results, but I still have a long way to go.

Imalwaysrightred · 2018-02-15T19:15:04+00:00

I can sense the oneitis in you holy shit. You have 2 choices

Keep her as a friend and use her as a wing woman. Hot women have hot friends.
If you’re not strong enough to do choice 1 cut all contact. It can be hard for us to get rid of a oneitis and choice 1 isn’t always feasible.

JamesBeanbore · 2018-02-15T19:36:09+00:00

You wouldn’t care about her if she wasn’t hott. She’s not that great by the way.

BornShook · 2018-02-15T20:04:59+00:00

Ima give you soms constructive critisism: Add a tldr. This post bores the shit out of me and I could only get one paragraph in

Redpilledaccordingly · 2018-02-15T20:06:44+00:00

You've sunk deep mate. She has relegated you to orbiter, no worries though, you'll definitely be on her radar. Just after she hits the wall and Chads have received BJs from every angle from her, ran a train on her, abused, and cheated on her.

This is the strategy women utilize, and it works well because "men" like you actually believe in that fairy-tale friends fall-in-love bs. She will never fall in love with you. She will get desperate and settle for you one day, because Chad won't or anybody with self-respect for that matter. Then divorce rape your ass. Do you really want to wait around for a by then desperate 35-year old slut to give you a chance?

Quit hamstering. You are not friends with her. You're a relegated orbiter who she's spinning.

Edit: Do not delete Snap, but take a hiatus from it. Quit opening stories and work on yourself.

TharsisRise · 2018-02-15T20:09:14+00:00

This is essentially what I have encountered in the lst week. Stay strong brother.

canadianmooserancher · 2018-02-15T20:26:39+00:00

Now it is time to take all that love and put it into that handsome sonofabitch in the mirror.

sd4c · 2018-02-15T21:17:26+00:00

Tough love warning. Old man here, and I have to kick your ass. Sorry, not sorry

I'm done. I'm done chasing after her.

No, you're not. Because “To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing.” -Mark Twain

for the woman who will probably never give me the level of intimacy that I desire.

Scorpions do not give rides back to frogs in return. Best case scenario, is no sting. There is no ride, women will not and cannot return loyal, honest, and reciprocal "intimacy", unless her name is Mom, or Grandma. PERIOD.

If you want someone you can bond with (and who doesn't), get a dog or a horse. Then while they scratch that friendship itch, build your value as a friend to other men by accumulating knowledge, learning how to build things, fix things, or trade things. This could be anything from electronics (not software!) to personal training. Now, having value, you will attract friends who have value.

I'm horrible at spitting game

You don't say. Listen, spitting game as a PUA is empty bullshit. Fix yourself, make and keep honest, hard-working, and intelligent male friends- and the verbal stuff will fall into place.

Last night, as she posted a Snapchat story of the valentines gift she got her bar-tard loser ex-boyfriend who borderline sexually assaulted her, I realized it was fucking pointless. Something clicked inside me: I will never hook up with this girl. There's no point in wasting all my sexual energy on an end that absolutely does not justify the means.

Yes! You have awoken. The rule is: No pussy, no headspace.

I will admit, though, that she is an amazing friend.

NO, she is not. I have a Playstation. If we're friends, I would let you play it almost anytime. She has a vagine. Why can't you play with it, or even LOOK at it? Because she saves it for her BEST friends. You're not GOOD enough. Aka, not her friend.

She's the only girl I've met in my life that has actual ambition.

Do you even remotely think this is true? It's not even mathematically possible. Wake up.

It turns me on how smart she is.

No offense, that is NOT normal. You know what turns me on? A healthy body, cute face, and a sweet heart. "Smart", is just a weapon that will be used against you when you inevitably argue. To rationalize and excuse her disrespect of you.

Fact is, I've been in love with her from the moment I set my eyes on her:

NO, you were not. "Love" is the involuntary response to virtue. "Smart" is not a virtue. Honesty, courage, compassion, prudence, self-awareness are. "Love" is for the person and character inside, who you have grown to know quite well. That takes months, at least. Not the moment you set eyes on her. That's "limerence", aka, lust. What you call "being in love", makes a mockery of the real thing.

I could tell from the start that she was different, that she was special.

No. AWALT.

I don't even care about the sex,

Good! Sex means nothing to women on birth control. They hand it out, like pencils.

I just want that next level of intimacy.

No, no, no. A woman's attention, is worth less than nothing. It diverts you from your goals, of which, the only possible serious goal you could truly have in common, would be the well-being of your kids, and after they're done and are adults, all bets are off.

Receiving gifts are a nice start, but sex isn't a gift and isn't even sex (biologically), unless it's unprotected (no BC). Anything less, is mutual masturbation.

Maybe in a year or so when she realizes what a sack of potatoes that kid is, she'll wake the fuck up.

That sack of potatoes is beating you by a whole lap in the race down her pants. Maybe you should see what his recipe is.

I'm way too close with her to sever the bond completely.

All the more reason to. For your own good.

She's one of my best friends and that's not going to change

Women are not your friends. This is not my idea. These are the words of Patrice O'Neil! "Women are the enemy. Don't you ever forget, it's us against them."

I've wasted so much time on Her

Yes. You have.

I've lost the confidence to go up and talk to girls at a bar.

Because you know you have very little, to offer them (compared to 35-year old, six-figure guys with a selection of suits and apartments, who also want to hit that)

I feel like I'm putting on training wheels, but I've got to start somewhere.

Start with the sidebar. Read all the links in the sidebar. Take notes. Read the notes.

I lift 4 times a week, swim two times a week, meditate daily, eat healthy, and meet my academic obligations, but I feel like I'm missing something. Something has got to change, and i know that that something is completely internal. I just don't know how to change it.

You're clearly capable of hard work. Use that ability to learn something worth money, to other straight men. Like fixing lighting arrays, making furniture, or selling cars. Money doesn't lie. Money is the equivalent of respect from other men- doubly so if you can earn it, honorably.

8 fucking months since I've touched a girl. 8 months of celibacy in 20 years where I've only had sex with one girl. How sad is that.

Not sad at all. Throughout 99% of human history, most people waited until marriage to have sex, if ever. Guys lifelong N-count would be 5-10. Girls, 1-3. If they can wait, so can you, pussy.

Well, no more. The red pill is swallowed. It's time to fulfill my ambition and be the sexual monster I've always known I could be.

WAY wrong focus. "Sex" as women call rubbing genitals together while on the pill, serves women, not men. It causes men to bond, but not women. They use this to their advantage- the vageen is a pink mind control tube. A weapon. Women bond with children- not men and not each other. Men will die for each other. Women, will not. See also: every World War and armed conflict.

It's time to fulfill every are of my life. I'm done focusing on her, it's time to truly focus on myself.

More than you think. Good luck. Whatever you do, listen to Black Philip and read Roissy's blog.

Title	I'm done chasing after Her
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	11
Comments	37
Date	February 15, 2018 2:55 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/7xqus2/im_done_chasing_after_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/im-done-chasing-after-her.48764 https://theredarchive.com/post/48764

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