Swallowing TRP while in a relationship

phx-au · 2014-03-09T02:48:16+00:00

Christ, stop overthinking things.

Just don't follow her lead like a little puppy dog. You still need to have your own goals, and do your own shit.

Do the spontaneous shit, take her out on dates. Presumably you are in an LTR because you actually enjoy spending time with her when you aren't fucking? If she suggests shit, and you think its a good idea, then do it; if you don't think so, don't make excuses, just tell her.

Ignore the TRP times 9/11 style advice of "never agree with a woman", etc, etc. You want to keep your LTR, you need to maintain both attraction and comfort - so try to keep both averages high, because in some situations you can't provide both.

robesta · 2014-03-08T22:27:00+00:00

So, I think your scared of losing her. She's looking for validation. That was a shit test. Stop buying her frame. You've been faithful and not abusive. You haven't deceived her. You don't owe her anything. You treat her exactly how YOU want to treat her, not how she THINKS she wants to be treated. If she doesn't want you at that point, move on. You don't change yourself for a woman, you allow the woman to come along on the awesome ride that is dray121212.

sekerzitski · 2014-03-08T18:22:21+00:00

My girl saying she felt alone, unappreciated, never thought I'd make her feel that way (as her past LTR have)...It made me very sad.

Shit test failed.

What exactlly do you want to correct? Lift your gf's mood? Be fun/cocky around her. You should make fun of her sadness (not in a mena way but in appropriate frame), not shed a tear with her. Doesn't help? Leave her to her "thoughts".

dray121212 · 2014-03-09T08:57:28+00:00

[permanently deleted]

organist · 2014-03-09T02:53:44+00:00

The red pill shouldn't be a "frame".

Without getting too meta on this shit, is gravity a "frame"?, is sunlight a frame? Is physics a frame?

Frames are a great metaphor and fantastic invention, but thinking TRP is a frame is a limiting belief.

littledazed · 2014-03-09T11:58:46+00:00

she thinks you dont like her anymore. wouldnt be surprised if she was bracing herself for things to end.

mordanus · 2014-03-08T22:37:01+00:00

Taking the red pill mid relationship is like living in an earthquake. Everything shifts and it's crazy as fuck for a while. If you don't maintain your frame the shaking will tear you apart. If you do maintain frame things will settle and you will have your dignity and manhood back.

SpoiledEG · 2014-03-08T18:24:27+00:00

It made me very sad. I've been a shit bf!

I presume you didn't beat her nor have you slept with other women. So, why do you think you've been a shit bf?

My girl saying she felt alone, unappreciated

Women often say shit like that to test you. Or sometimes they say it just because of their period.

Julian_Berryman · 2014-03-09T11:14:20+00:00

Sounds like you've gone off the deep end; she needs more carrot, less stick.

Spend time with her [what she wants] doing things you suggest [what you want]. Take her bowling, paintballing, watch an action movie, whatever. She needs a leader; at the moment she's fulfilling her RPW duties but you aren't fulfilling yours - you're asleep at the wheel!

Don't give in to shit tests, all they do is give her the control. She's trying to domesticate you.

What to do when she's balling her eyes out? Act like a parental figure. Sit there and listen. Acknowledge what she says but don't admit fault or try and rationalise - she is not in a rational mood. Don't reward this behaviour with compromise (e.g. "OK I'll make sure I do my share of the chores").

When she comes off the boil, get back to the top deck and steer the ship properly. You can't treat your LTR like a plate. The role you fulfill is similar but it isn't sustainable long term. She will require something more than a fuck a few times a week. Stop being lazy bear!

cainchan · 2014-03-10T02:06:15+00:00

Sorry to say that but it might be the simple thing that you have changed. you swallowed the redpill so you now are no the same person that she felt for. There are big chances for things to end between you, because you are not now what she likes and faking it to maintain you LTR is kinda shit. You might just not be suited to each other anymore, have different goals, different views on things. If she told you calmly, without any drama that she was not happy with the relationship and with the way you are, then she is not testing, she is telling you that she is starting to leave.

HeadingRed · 2014-03-10T21:08:22+00:00

Don't let it devolve into your abdicating from decision making. Example-

You plan the quality time, pick the places, start time, stop time. You need to make sure you don't flake. Stay consistent. Offer small options but you keep the bigger ones. For instance I planned a day with my girl. I picked the first 3 places we would go to and dinner. I let her choose where to go for lunch but from a list I made up.

BluepillProfessor · 2014-03-11T05:26:30+00:00

Beta behaviors are critical in a relationship as they create the feeling of safety that is needed long term. Nothing wrong with taking your woman by the hand and cuddling with her until her feelings subside. Let her see that you really do care for her (before resuming treating her with indifference and interacting with her from an overwhelming feeling of abundance and OI).

newbie3hunna · 2014-03-08T20:51:58+00:00

This has to be a troll.

2014-03-09T02:13:05+00:00

I find nothing sadder than the domesticated man with his long term relationship. The guy who poses in tens of 'couple shots' per week for his partner to post on FB, buys her the typical relationships gifts because shes so great "Oh here is the flowers my [insert boyfriend here] got me, how special are we!".

He's about as free as a bird in a cage and she basically flaunts him around for personal satisfaction. These obvious beta provider men are about as low as you can go.

Title	Swallowing TRP while in a relationship
Author	dray121212
Upvotes	25
Comments	43
Date	March 8, 2014 5:53 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1zwjgb/swallowing_trp_while_in_a_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/swallowing-trp-while-in-a-relationship.12333 https://theredarchive.com/post/12333

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