I felt like the relationship ran its course.

She was a great person, and despite her high achievements in academia (summa cum laude), she still was a very insecure person.

I did everything in my power to make her feel like she was a great person, and doing amazing things in life.

From November of 2017, up until the day she crossed the stage at University of Maryland and graduated with her Masters in Public Health, she was habitually complaining and worrying about everything.

I basically made it my duty and responsibility to try to change her mood. But it never worked, and rightfully so.

The day of her commencement ceremony, I woke up early, bought flowers, sat next to her family and was hoping she would be happy to see me after she crossed the stage. Seven years of dating the same woman, I was hoping I would get some type of moment of gratitude from her (Rule #6 confirmed).

Her facial expression, her body language, and her inability to show some type of affection to see me was absent.

Seven years of dating, and this was the best we could do? I did a lot of reflecting and started questioning my own ability to be a boyfriend. Days later, I felt like it was appropriate to end things with her. By her own surmise, she was surprised once she found herself on the other end up being dumped. Again, our entire relationship was based on us arguing, her threatening to end things, and me begging for forgiveness.

It was very unhealthy, and inconsiderate of each other.

Her response after I told her I no longer wanted to be in a relationship was, “It hurts, and it feels like I am losing you, and I don’t want to”, and I was shocked because she actually gave a damn.

One of the main reasons I stuck around was because I was desperate and afraid to go back out in the field. Needless to say, days after breaking up with her, I hooked up with this 20F with a hump like a camel. But sadly, I returned to my old AFC ways and would spend hours with this lady out of desperation.

I think now, I am slowly learning how to mentally remove women from my mind by continually spin plates, and what I am finding subconsciously is, I no longer have the energy or desire to talk about these so called love interest. I am only 2 months out, and Tomasi mentioned this being a process and I have to be eager but also patient.