Dudes who lay it on thick during initial talking phase

StainedGlassCat · 2021-09-09T11:42:39+00:00

Be wary of this behavior. This sounds like he's either insecure or lovebombing. You cannot know someone from talking through text. Even if you've been talking for several weeks, many of these men can really keep the mask up through text but it slips on the date. Men who do this, especially before ever meeting you, are likely lovebombing and trying to create a false bond. Don't fall for it.

Super genuinely nice, HV men don't do this. They will show their interest through actions, a good flow of conversation, and the questions they ask to get to know you, as well as planning dates. This man sounds like he's trying to create false intimacy before the date so that when he shows red flags you'll be into him and more willing to ignore them. I'd block and delete anyone who thinks I'm "the best thing since sliced bread" without even meeting me, because that's a huge red flag.

Also, you're posting here for advice. Trust your gut, girl. It has already told you he's shady, I'm just here backing your gut up!

dancedancedance7 · 2021-09-09T19:25:02+00:00

The talking phase is... useless. In fact if you are on OLD, you are doing disservice the longer you speak to a man before meeting him for a date. I think a guy wants a penpal if he doesn't ask you out within oh, maybe a day or two of matching? And no lengthy text convos! You get emotionally attached for no reason.

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2021-09-09T13:33:10+00:00

He's trying to schmooze his way into your pants. Never trust anybody who's making statements about you as a person when you've only had a few conversations with them. You haven't even met in person!

He could also simply be unstable looking to attach quickly to someone. Another big red flag!

Either way this is bad news.

super_thinker_ · 2021-09-09T16:32:47+00:00

HVM with secure attachment will treat you like the stranger you are until you’ve advanced to the next level of familiarity. Intimacy and trust take a slow and easy time to build - they should never be rushed.

Yellowsunflowerlover · 2021-09-09T16:35:45+00:00

Be very wary. This is how guys try to lovebomb. It’s been two weeks, constant compliments like this are a red flag. You don’t get to know someone in two weeks, let alone by text only. A HVM would show you by actions, conversation etc that he has a genuine interest LVM throw this bait to see what they can get away with. That or he’s emotionally unstable. I’d keep a close eye on how this develops, but it’s most likely going to end up as a block and delete.

Determinedblonde · 2021-09-16T14:23:58+00:00

He hasn’t even suggesting FaceTime or Skype etc? If he hasn’t bothered, then it’s all fake.

Title	Dudes who lay it on thick during initial talking phase
Author	daglowup
Upvotes	64
Comments	13
Date	September 9, 2021 6:31 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askFDS
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/AskFDS/comments/pksbq1/dudes_who_lay_it_on_thick_during_initial_talking/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askFDS/dudes-who-lay-it-on-thick-during-initial-talking.1069651 https://theredarchive.com/post/1069651

Comments