I've read the handbook, and my understanding of dating is that we should only go on dates with men we are attracted to. We shouldn't be obsessed with men we barely know or just began dating. Only after the guy has proven he is HV should we start having feelings for these men.

Approaching dating from this rational approach benefits women, but unfortunately, I have the habit of having feelings (aka crushes) on men who have no interest in pursuing a relationship with me. I think it's just the way my brain works. When I spend some brief time with a guy, I am either unattracted to the guy, somewhat attracted to the guy but have no interest in dating him as he has traits I see as incompatible or I just didn't feel "the spark", or is head over heels for him (and nearly all the guys I had felt this way about turned out to be taken). How can I break out of this cycle? I didn't have any new "crushes" since discovering this sub and I am hoping I will never have any of these embarrassing crushes again. Without these strong "feelings", I don't feel like I should go on a date with a guy though as I just "don't like him enough". How does liking a guy work?

Edit: I've never for a lot of guys I develop feelings for, they're often not only taken but very nice and intelligent on the surface level and very active on social media. I don't know why I'm drawn to guys who turn out to be like that as I am inactive on social media. I guess I don't want a life partner who posts on social media on a weekly basis due to incompatibility so I'm sick of this "pattern" on crushing on guys who turn out to be like that.