Alternative hypothesis

SteelToeShitKicker · 2017-06-09T21:45:02+00:00

If you would make a plan and stick to it for a few months, you might make progress. Instead, you come here every 3 days with a new plan, all you end up doing is spinning your wheels.

Chart a course and then get there. It's going to take more than 3 days.

FireTempered · 2017-06-09T22:28:31+00:00

Her Chad is her home. You must decide, what do you really want to do. She must decide what she really wants to do. This could be the end, and you need to get ready for that.

She won't cheat and end it, but she appears to be asking you to end it, covertly. IMO she is a non-assertive person that is very angry with being away for her "home", and YOU are the cause. She probably will not even admit to her anger. If you offer to take her home, she may say no. Get it straight, you have to lead here 100%, she is not going to be any help to you. More later.....

That's is why nothing makes any sense to you, and you mostly don't make any sense to us.

You are 100% deep into your Oneitis and you cannot believe that her Chad is "where she came from". Now is the time to believe it or just keep going around in circles trying to understand that which you will not allow yourself to believe. In trying to understand and placate her you have made yourself even more beta and even less attractive, and this shit has to stop now. If for no other reason than to reclaim your self respect.

2ndal · 2017-06-09T21:27:59+00:00

So I'm not in an average MRP situation; whatever I do, even if I were Chad, she would want to return home, I'm 100% sure of it.

Just do the work. Don't keep coming up with excuses.

MRP works not because of how it changes her. It works because how it changes YOU. It would work whether she was living in a foreign country or on the moon.

Grow some balls and get to work.

pikadildo · 2017-06-09T21:59:02+00:00

Maybe you're both just hurting each other trying to "win" your way out of a stalemate. You're trying to understand why she's hurting you and it's taking your brain to silly places--she doesn't wear thongs or fancy underwear for you because she... wants to move home. Even it it's remotely plausible, it's hilarious.

The only way forward is to realize there's nothing to win and that she can't actually hurt you by not wearing thongs.

donedreadpirate · 2017-06-09T22:36:05+00:00

I have to say you have one of the worst cases of living in your wife's frame I have seen since I joined. I really hope you stick with this because I'm going to enjoy watching you escape.

Take on this mentality: Fuck her. Forget it. She's nothing to me. She's gone. I'm moving on.

Join something social. Join a social group. Start going out without her. Keep lifting. Hit on girls constantly. You need to start building your own life. You are living in her life. You are missing out on your life.

Edit: /u/FireTempered just showed me (and you) the light. I change my mind. Don't take my advice. Take his.

stonepimpletilists · 2017-06-10T01:31:27+00:00

No one is special or unique

Get your head out of her ass. Jesus doesn't like anal

AmericanViking64 · 2017-06-09T23:14:57+00:00

Dude your wife doesn't give a shit where she lives. She is probably being honest when she tells you that's why she is unhappy/bored but in reality she doesn't know either (or wont admit it).

Since you don't want to admit that your wife wants Chad / your not Chad, you end up believing the same bullshit she tells herself. Literally the definition of living in her frame.

Forget about your wife, she has long since forgotten about you. You disappeared years ago and regardless of your improvements she still cant see a significant change yet.

screechhater · 2017-06-09T23:33:40+00:00

You are spinning so hard, you aren't making semse. Just chill. Sit back and learn to laugh at her behavior.

Perhaps it's time to fake it until you make it

MRPFuckMe1 · 2017-06-10T01:06:01+00:00

The plan for stay or go is the same--marriage or where you live.

What's the plan dude?

On a side note, you've got one hell of a hamster there. And you sure as shit like to feed it.

Turbotec · 2017-06-10T04:41:48+00:00

Take a hypothetical look at your recent journey on a map. It seems like you are all over the place. Drunk captain! It's time to buckle down and focus on becoming a better man for yourself. How much of this post is about her and in her frame! Dude! Get out of her frame and get back to the basics!!! The rest will fall in line. And if it doesn't....well it's time for you to start working on your IDGAF attitude!

youmolide · Sat Jun 10 20:31:06 2017 UTC

Holy Shite !

Just went thru a version of this myself. (Sidenote : Have no idea what the OP's backstory is here)

My story - married 15 years - moved around for work a lot - got tired of it and bought some land in the country - my son and I built the house ourself. Wife is a foreigner, grew up in city. Also just turned 39 (Rollo's rational male talks about this danger point).

So over the summer of building the house get in best physical shape of entire marriage - wife comes back, hates new house.

I was not Red Pilled when this was going on, but I (luckily) didn't make a lot of mistakes dealing with it either - and what mistakes I did make, I now have a plan for making sure they never happen again.

Basically the first couple of times the whining came up I sat down and 'splained' it all to her - why we were here (much better environment for kids and for the family as a whole) and how important this was for the development of our children and how we had discussed doing this for years now, and she had agreed with ever step along the path to where we now were.

After a few more sessions like this, I basically sat down and told her this is what we are going to do, and if it's not something she can handle, she needed to think about leaving. I told her I loved her, but if she was always going to be unhappy with what we had decided, then she needed to go somewhere else. And after 8 months of this, she left.

Took her to the bus station, gave her a little wave goodbye (should have seen the look on her face when I did that ) and off she went.

Divorce paperwork done (I handled all of it) worked out the custody of the kids (they get to decide who they want to live with and when as long as they don't flipflop too often) and gave her a big fat fuck off check - not going to do alimony for the rest of my life. Kids now live with me almost all the time. And if they decide their mom is a better bet, that's their decision and I'll deal with that if/when it happens too.

While married, I paid for everything - wife never had to work - now she is out on her own and finding out that working 40 hours a week at shit minwage jobs isn't that much fun. Not my circus, not my monkeys.

In the end, in this kind of situation you have to decide HOW important the decision you made to uproot your family IS. In my case, my father did something similar when I was 10 and it literally changed my ENTIRE existence for the better - made me tougher stronger smarter - and I want that for MY kids. Strike that - my kids NEED that experience to make them the best they can be.

So it came down to : Pacify the wife OR do what is best for your kids (and your entire family). Verdict : No contest in my book - There's the door. Go thru it or don't. Your choice. I'm sad she chose that road - but she did CHOOSE it, not me - so the only thing I can do is pick myself up off the floor, evaluate any mistakes I made, make changes to avoid a repeat, and get out there and find someone better. And there are lots of 'better' out there. Even at my age (57) I'm doing just fine in that department.

Here's the kicker- if I HAD chosen to pacifiy the wife, I am 95 % convinced I would have ended up divorced anyways. And ... here's another takeaway - all of this went down with me being in the best shape of my marriage. Didn't matter to her.

All you can do in life is make yourself the best man, the best father, the best husband you can be - and even then, it STILL might not be enough to keep you married. Men have to deal with all kinds of shit situations in life. This is just another one of them. I learn, I adjust, I come out the other end smarter and stronger - that's not that bad of an outcome in my book.

BluepillProfessor · 2017-06-10T22:57:13+00:00

A woman doesn't need your elaborate scheme to turn into a bitch. It comes perfectly natural without any of the immigration issues and the solution is exactly the same. This is not a special situation at all.

Also you can't control the wife's bitchy behavior. You can only control how you respond to the bitchy behavior.

Title	Alternative hypothesis
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	51
Date	June 9, 2017 8:57 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6gb81k/alternative_hypothesis/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/alternative-hypothesis.206030 https://theredarchive.com/post/206030

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