Dead Widows

il-est-ressuscite · 2016-02-19T14:26:18+00:00

Man, I don't think you really know anything about grief, or mental illness, or the middle ground between your "two extremes" for that matter.

And stop fucking thinking every breaved person is exactly the same and defined solely by their relationship to another person.

Once again, I tried to let this one pass, but I'm like a fish biting on that bait....and you guys can argue all you want with me, but how you treat your spouse/SO when they are ill is one of the BEST indicators of the quality of your realtionship and how THEY feel about YOU and how YOU feel about THEM and what kind of person you/they are generally.

Nobody likes a fucking whiner, male or female. All this bullshit about having a pulled muscle making your wife treat you like some apex predator taking down a "wounded gazelle."

Look, my wife knew she was going to die. I knew she was going to die. We discussed how (me and her alone in the room at the hospice) and what was going to happen afterwards.

She told me to find someone else as soon as I felt ready, not to sit around and wallow.

Thanks to the deus ex machina effect of MRP (I know!) I was able to FINALLY carry out her last wishes. So, Along with MRP and the people here, there's a boat captain in Southwest Florida who has my eternal gratitude. He told me that the day we spent together on the water made a classical music lover out of him and that anytime he hears The Girl with the Flaxen Hair, Beethoven's Adante Favori, or Lark Ascending, he will think of me, and my wife. I will think of him, when the tarpon run this spring, out on the water, Handel's Harp Concerto blasting.

So, if I can use MRP to do that, then if you need to, you can use it to deal with the your fucked-upness and interpersonal issues.

I can't remember what the fucking point of all this was except I'm already pissed off, still missing the Girl with the Flaxen Hair, and this circle jerk post made it worse.

So, you do you. And I mean that in the best /u/whinemoreplease way.

over60_stupid_loner · 2016-02-19T04:49:20+00:00

Yet even MRP in all its glory seems to barely move the peg off of flu = divorce.

OK Seems some of choir missed the sermon on this. The difference is being sick and wanting to be nurtured, and being sick and continuing to be in control of your life, unless the illness is ABSOLUTELY debilitating.

So you get the flu. You can either:

1 -Go to bed and whine. Need someone to bring you food and drink and listen to you complain about your pain.

2 - Medicate yourself. Get out of bed, go to get what you need, go to work. Act like you are the only person that can do it. Because you are. STFU and get through it. When you want it, initiate sex.

My point is that the flu is not the last stage of terminal cancer. You didn't break both legs. And your will to live should be intact up to your dying breath. And the man that whines with a sore throat or a cold, deserves to lose all pussy privileges for life.

The issue is not the behavior of women. A woman's revulsion for a weak man is at least consistent. Women have survival for themselves and their children hard wired into their brain. The problem is the lack of desire on the part of so many otherwise strong and intelligent men, to take charge of themselves, and, to bear the ultimate responsibility for their lives. In sickness and in health.

IASGame · 2016-02-19T08:16:22+00:00

I think if you love your wife, even if you don't have oneitis (or maybe even more so if you don't have oneitis) you would want her to be happy after you die.

I suspect anyone that idealizes his widow pining away for decades or killing herself out of grief has not yet accepted that she is not yours, it is just your turn.

Sepean · 2016-02-19T07:25:22+00:00

Let's not idolize those bullshit cultures. Those women killed themselves because if they didn't, their family would do it anyway or at least they'd be shunned for life, and for superstitious people going to heaven or getting an awesome karmic rebirth really takes the sting out of suicide.

DumQDumA · 2016-02-19T12:07:43+00:00

I think there are many variables to this and every time I've begun to respond to you I've thought of another angle. So, I'll lay out quick bullet points to what I think is going on.

Time: The longer a couple is together, the deeper the connection will be when both the man and woman were filling their roles. My grandmother never married or dated when my grandfather died (she was 60ish) so they had been together for quite a while and she was old and knew there was no point to dating as either she or the dude would just die.
Mental Health: A lot of chicks suffer from extreme anxieties due to the pressures put on them from society, their fellow women, and themselves. I would never want to be a woman or think like a woman, their minds are fucking wild with uncontrolled emotions. If a chick were to lose her husband, she may truly believe that the world has ended and that she would rather die as well than face the thought of facing the world alone.

The Reality of it all I would like to think that when I died my wife would never find a man to truly replace me. But, she would find a dude to fuck and provide for her, so be it.

My goal is not to have my wife kill herself or go through life alone, but rather to move on and find peace, BUT every guy will be compared to me and whether she admits it to him or not, for the rest of her life and possible next marriage relationship she will always think, TTB wasn't weak like this pussy, he would have done it better.

Again, I'll be dead so I don't give a fuck but I think that chicks who kill themselves because their man died had mental issues from the start and the ones who never remarry or date were with that man for so long that they don't want anyone else to ruin the memories, they don't need to financial support, or they are at the point where they don't want to put in the time or energy.

irateMD · 2016-02-19T12:17:22+00:00

Most women aren't this shitty, but when women are shitty partners, then branch swinging during a partner's illness is one of the things that happens.

Alpha widow is a different concept. It's the idea that a woman who has been with someone more attractive than you may treat you like shit because you don't measure up to her expectations.

adamalan · 2016-02-20T19:43:41+00:00

I ran across this on deep conversion from Rollo's recent podcast. Seemed salient.

Total submission of body and soul in which the woman trusts and admires you so much she presents her whole being to you to do as you please.

I havn't followed that rabbit hole yet. Sounds a lot like MRP advise in many ways. Rollo urged cation with it; works too well. The author uses it for pick-up; men might use it for saving families.

BluepillProfessor · 2016-02-24T16:56:56+00:00

This is very close to concern trolling but I believe it is an interesting point/objection to MRP that adds value.

My grandmother married a much older man, and pinned way for decades after his passing

She would have had a MUCH different reaction if he had slowly become sick and disabled and a burden, rather than a cherished memory.

Widow suicide

This is 1/10 as common as widower suicide but again, it is based on the MEMORY not the reality. Women are controlled by feelz and will ALWAYS idolize the imaginary "you" that you show her, not the "real' you.

MRP in all its glory seems to barely move the peg off of flu = divorce.

Because most MRP guys start off as Blue Pill Betas or even Omegas and have to work to become more Alpha. A woman will not leave an Alpha if he gets the flu but a Beta getting the flu is considerably more serious. It doesn't mean "divorce" but it does mean a barrage of Shit Tests and uncertainty.

Women have two distinct kinds of love- for their Alpha man and for their children. If a man gets terribly sick it is easy for many women to switch into parent/child mode and spend the rest of her life playing Florence Nightingale.

She can wash his dirty old dick and balls for the rest of his life and do it with love and compassion. What she CANNOT do is force herself to WANT to suck that dirty old dick she is washing.

Since guys on MRP want to get their dirty old dicks sucked and prefer to wash it themselves (most of the time anyway) showing weakness- like getting sick- is the last thing we want to do.

alpha_n3rd · 2016-02-19T04:01:03+00:00

Times were different. Men were alpha and women were brainwashed to be faithful wives. Now men are faggots and women are brainwashed to be sloots.

42andatowel · 2016-02-19T15:36:47+00:00

I'd want to see some real statistics, but I don't think you see as many widows pining away for their lost husbands with the younger generations.

My grandmother never remarried after my grandpa passed away, she's been a widow for 30+ years.

My Grandpa was the same way and he was a widower for 40+ years.

My great grandfather was the worst. However, he got married at 16, and lived with my great grandmother for over 75 years before she passed. For 75 years they woke up beside each other, lived their lives together, with hardly a day spent apart, and then on morning he's waking up alone. That'll really take the wind out of your sails.

So, yes, AWALT, Branch Swinging, etc. But there is more to it than all of that.

Title	Dead Widows
Author	adamalan
Upvotes	2
Comments	21
Date	February 19, 2016 3:42 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/46iq91/dead_widows/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/dead-widows.207657 https://theredarchive.com/post/207657

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