I wrote a post on this similar thing a while back. Got some solid advice but it actually seems to be getting worst.

When I started on this journey I start with dread and quickly realized that it brought along a lot of comfort test. Someone had mentioned that my wife is now living in anxiety due to the dread. I realized that just by focusing on myself, It produced enough dread. So I didn’t need to add anymore. I dropped it almost completely and upped the comfort.

This seemed to help but now I’m faced with two things.

  1. If I come home from work or have an off day and don’t show my love for her. She will ask what’s wrong 100 times. I’m getting sick of saying nothing.

I will say something like. “Nothing at all. Long day. Come here.” Make out with her. Smack her ass tell her I love her. If we’re alone I’ll escalate to sex if I’m in the mood.

Or ask what makes you think something is wrong? And she will say. You’re not loving like you were yesterday.

  1. Once I provide that comfort it’s almost like she’s looking for it like a drug all the time or she thinks something is wrong or gets all depressed.

I could literally cuddle her. Give her back rub. Tell her I love her. Bang her brains out. And later on she’s asking if I still love her.

She will constantly comment on other women looking at me. Telling me to promise I won’t cheat on her. Etc.

I will say things like. No other woman can give a blow job (or knows what I like) like you do.

She will smile and say something sexy back. But then a couple hours later. She’s back looking for love.

My wife has rarely ever turned me down for sex. Honestly. Even when we used to argue. So I’m thinking yes this is all great.

But she got a UTI a week ago so we didn’t do anything sexual which I was totally fine with. Last night She woke up at 5am to blow me. And later told me she was tired but did it so I wouldn’t cheat on her.

The funny thing is, I work with all men. Lift and hangout with my family. I don’t know why her hamster is going nuts but it’s starting to feel like she’s doing things out of anxiety instead of genuine desire. She’s actually like losing sleep over it. She will say she dreams about me cheating on her. Wake up and can’t fall back asleep.

She leaves the house and text me she misses me after being gone for an hour. It’s becoming excessive to the point I’m thinking there’s some underlying codependency or insecurity issues going on. She is very attractive, So I don’t really get where this is all stemming from or how to navigate us through this.

I’m still reading the sidebar so maybe I didn’t get to a point where this is talked about. But I wouldn’t mind some advice on what’s going on. Or what I can do? I get her issues aren’t my problem to solve. But I’m starting to question my own actions in all this because I’m not going to lie it’s starting to break into my frame where I don’t know what to tell her, and am getting annoy by having to reassure her nothing is wrong or going on.

I also thought maybe it has to do with being at home with the kids all the time. She stopped working out and doing anything else as much. So I encouraged her to start working out again. Go to a concert with her friend Or find a new hobby. To get her mind off of things. I’m just not sure, I never dealt with this before.