Should I post-nuptial

SteelToeShitKicker · 2018-03-20T17:27:24+00:00

Anyway to my question, she has finished her degree last May and found full time work but her income does not pay enough for her to cover all the loans and credit card debt she racked up over the last 5 years (graduate degrees are fucking expensive)

Why? Did she get a worthless degree? Does she need to look for a different job? Did she go crazy with credit cards?

My concern, we have a good relationship, only red flag ever was right after she finished graduation she had a self described mental breakdown and said she was poly and wanted to open the relationship up.

LOL, hey guys, side note here, nothing really to see, but wife wanted to take some dick on the side. Totally, cool, right guys?

Why is it that fatties are always the ones that want to go "poly"?

johneyapocalypse · 2018-03-20T18:51:42+00:00

so I was considering a post nuptial agreement

Unilaterally or is she in on this grand plan of yours?

only red flag ever was right after she finished graduation she had a self described mental breakdown and said she was poly and wanted to open the relationship up

Was she a fat-ass then too?

I had a BP breakdown and went through her phone web history and found a bunch of poly articles.

I had to look up what a poly is.

Then I had to look up what a pansexual is.

Christ your wife is complicated. A fat, complicated, no-pre-nup-signing, lard-ass, polysexual bitch.

She's a keeper.

I know there's a question in there...

Anyway to my question, she has finished her degree last May and found full time work but her income does not pay enough for her to cover all the loans and credit card debt she racked up over the last 5 years (graduate degrees are fucking expensive). If we can get rid of the credit cards she can pay her other bills and will get predictable salary raises each year. I can take a loan on my 401k and possibly refinance our mortgage to take care of the credit cards but this leaves me holding the bag if our marriage was ever to end so I was considering a post nuptial agreement that left me the house and control over my 401k as these are my only large assets. Would this be reasonable or would it even matter if there was a divorce? Just trying to protect my only assets, I wasn't planning on paying for her school to begin with.

So let me get this straight. You want to (1) take on debt by paying off her debt and (2) take out money on your 401-k, so your fat, poly-sexual wife can... what exactly?

What is the end-game here?
Is she really that special?

Lot's of dudes say "only (one) red flag" like you did - but you've outlined quite a few red flags in your first post.

I would like to say that your wife is "redder than red" in the flag department but it turns out that's a Bob Marley song and his lyrics don't convey the appropriate message. He actually talks about dread - perhaps in a different context - but I can see that you are for some reason diametrically opposed to the concept of dread. Unless your winter-loving wife is dreading you.

Shit show.

My two questions still stand.

Alpha_Engineer99 · 2018-03-20T17:40:01+00:00

“Captain save a hoe” in the house.

InChargeMan · 2018-03-21T02:25:34+00:00

LOL, OP is being dreaded by his unattractive, over-weight, post-wall wife. How sad is that?

RuleZeroDAD · 2018-03-21T03:33:03+00:00

Get the divorce.

Let her keep her unsecured (cc) debt and Student Loan. Chop the 401k. Sell the house and split the equity, if any. Pay your child support.

You'll come out miles ahead, and rebound faster, as she will need to defer her student loans (or go income-contingent payment plan), file for bankruptcy to discharge her credit card debt, get off her fat ass and support herself, do the day-to-day with the kids, and have no time to have a crew of chubby chasers run a train on her.

You were a pussy, vetted for shit, subsidized a person with no self-control, and apologize for her.

Do what you want, but your hole(s) is(are) deep and wide, and she would allow it(them) to get wider if she had her way.

red-sfpplus · 2018-03-20T17:36:03+00:00

credit card debt she racked up

You allowed her to rack up, you mean.

Credit cards are 50/50 in divorce. Student loan debt is 100% hers.

Pick up a copy of Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover and get to work on your financial recovery plan.

Instant gratification is a farce.

I have leveraged home equity, but to make more money - not pay of debt.

When I was younger and lost a job, we did take out a 401K loan to cover bills while I got back on my feet. It worked out fine.

Bottom line is - if you dont fix your "living above your means" issue - then you no amount of debt shuffling, or leverage will help you.

I am not addressing anything related to her. You have to take care of your own finances first.

abdada · 2018-03-20T17:15:42+00:00

Your 401K and her shitty budgeting have nothing to do with each other.

FlyingSexistPig · 2018-03-20T17:36:30+00:00

Graduate degrees are not expensive. Most people get paid to do them. Your wife just paid for an expensive babysitter.

BostonBrakeJob · 2018-03-20T17:45:11+00:00

Since she was jk, I'd say don't worry about your assests. Women joke about wanting side dick all the time. AWALT, amiright?! /s

screechhater · 2018-03-21T02:50:43+00:00

You either lift 2x a week or 3x a week.

Not 2-3 times a week

She was working full time, going to school, having your kids and raising them ? And, you want a post nuptual ?

Get a fucking grip.

Educate yourself in your state about marriage debt, then just reread your post and think about your needy, bitchy whinny assed bullshit and how attractive you truly have become.

Fuck

MrChad_Thundercock · 2018-03-20T17:21:58+00:00

“ can take a loan on my 401k” = Retarded.

You are about to get played.

FlyingSexistPig · 2018-03-20T17:52:34+00:00

"...but my wife is type A personality Alpha controls a lot of the decisions."

This is a big problem. She doesn't want to control the decisions, but she has to, because you don't. There needs to be a leader, and you're not stepping up.

Phaxis81 · 2018-03-21T03:42:35+00:00

My wife will be eligible for student loan forgiveness for part of it luckily

Phaxis81 · 2018-03-21T03:43:38+00:00

Sorry to burst your bubble but it didn't. I can take a joke unlike some people

Phaxis81 · 2018-03-21T03:45:33+00:00

I already admitted I fucked up, I'm a newbie and it's a long road ahead for me, I'm not making any excuses

Phaxis81 · 2018-03-21T03:52:12+00:00

Thanks for all the input guys, MRP has been a hard pill to try and swallow

ABC_NO · 2018-03-21T14:27:22+00:00

Dumpster fire!

RedPillCoach · 2018-03-21T16:58:21+00:00

poly

there was no other guy

This could be the ultimate in trickle truth. Did you ask her if there was another girl?

Phaxis81 · 2018-03-20T17:50:43+00:00

Yes, crazy with credit cards while I was not captaining the ship. She has an in demand degree but just starting will need to work her way up. I have dave Ramsey's plan and am starting to implement the steps. I doubt she's cheated, not really any time due to our schedules but it's always a possibility

Title	Should I post-nuptial
Author	Phaxis81
Upvotes	2
Comments	62
Date	March 20, 2018 5:09 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/85uev4/should_i_postnuptial/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/should-i-post-nuptial.204700 https://theredarchive.com/post/204700

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