Happily married TRPers how do you do it?

legitworkaccount · 2014-10-01T14:43:11+00:00

EDIT: updated to answer edited (and much clearer) question

1) The fact that there are many younger, more attractive, smarter, etc. women out there

This comes down to what you want out of life. I want a nuclear family with a smart/capable/maternal woman.

The above takes into account that no two women are the same and that there is no such thing as "one true love" (seriously, fuck disney). The best bet is to find a woman that meets most of your requirements and then you sort of polish the rougher edges into what you're looking for in a woman (btw women are doing the same to guys: that's where compromises come into play).

So, yes I could run around with younger/more attractive women, but the more work you put into a single woman the more you'll get out of it; assuming that's what you want. If you want to bang around, by all means the world is your oyster.

The day to day effort it takes to have a proper captain/first mate relationship

The day-to-day effort is honestly very well described by Athol Kay's The Married Man Sex Life Primer. It's like any other goal, you have to keep the end in mind while focusing on the day to day activities. If you want gainz, you have to keep your focus on your ideal body while going to the gym and eating healthy.

In relationships that have taken a fall, the day to day will be really hard with little results (like when you're fat and just start working out). You won't see results, in fact you might even gain some weight (muscle weight vs fat weight), but if you keep at it, you'll see results. It's the end-goal that provides the visual to keep going, which in turn allows you to reap the rewards.

Jack--Hammer · 2014-10-01T16:04:09+00:00

First of all: Find the right one! I made a long list of requirements and didn't settle until I found one who fulfilled all of them. Remember you are looking for more than a nice piece of ass.

Then you lead and fuck her like an alpha would, but nurture and comfort her like a beta would. You need to find the mix that won't scare her off and won't bore her either. She must feel that she can rely on you come thick or thin, but also that you won't crack under the pressure. Admonish and correct her when appropriate but also praise and lavish her when appropriate.

And do your outmost to never start a fight or get baited into a fight. Float on top of it, never zing or stab with words. You are the more mature one and should behave as such. Speak with kindness and love but don't break frame. For over 6 years we have not had a single fight or heated argument and she respects me immensely for that. I also appreciate us not tarnishing our relationship with fights.

Most people do not believe our claim, but I say that we all don't need to follow the brainwashing of media and our ancestors and peers into seeing fights as something natural. Immature people fight, mature people can find mature ways to settle differences.

Edit post-clarification: 1. I don't care much for girls when I have a woman. Also I listened to my own first advice and got me the best one, wouldn't trade her for all the pussy in the world. 2. As I picked a good woman she's already pretty RP and happily submits, and I happily take charge. Sometimes I let her take the helm, to continue the sea faring metaphor, usually when it comes to planning activities and such because I'm more of a right-here-right-now kind of guy and stuff two days ahead or more are just not part of my inner universe.

ConcertOfPunches · 2014-10-01T14:29:27+00:00

Anyone?

Wolfwoodd · 2014-10-01T17:10:14+00:00

Figure out what you want (type of woman, lifestyle, etc.). Then, learn how to get it (better yourself, learn how to properly screen for what you want). Don't settle for less.

Source: I'm a happily married TRP guy with a great relationship / sex life.

[deleted] · 2014-10-01T17:19:36+00:00

How are you happy related to:

1) The fact that there are many younger, more attractive, smarter, etc. women out there

This is tough sometimes, especially as I learn more about women and know I can very easily get just about any of the ones I associate with. They flirt with me, too. However, my wife knows this, so she makes sure to sexually claim me regularly so I don't stray. As a result, I get all the sex I want. And familiarity has its benefits. She's a good person and I enjoy having her around.

2) The day to day effort it takes to have a proper captain/first mate relationship

It's not that bad once you get into the swing of things. It makes you a better man, because you can't get lazy like you could as a single guy. I enjoy self-improvement and finding ways to make my life better, so this is all par for the course, anyway.

rplearn · 2014-10-01T18:03:54+00:00

Happy guy here. We have traditional family roles. I work. She stays home with the kids. I make the important decisions. She grew up poor and religious. She has a perfect reputation of being a good person and not slutty. She treated her parents and family well (parents stayed married. No daddy issues). We married young (20, 19). Had kids a few years after that. As a Christian, she and I believe that God has established me as the head of the household. Practically, this grants me more perceived authority and confidence.

She adores me. She cooks, cleans, sex whenever. She is very frugal, almost to a fault. I am steady and consistent. I do not lean on her or anyone for emotional support. I am skilled in what I do. I establish order in the home and at work.

We were both virgins when we married (blood on the sheets etc). This was by choice and conviction.

My goal was never to have sex with lots of people, but to live my life and eventually succeed through hard work. I remember talking to her when we were friends and saying that I planned to get married after I was financially independent. I think she saw my potential and bought in early. Since then, I have continued to be successful in my profession.

I suppose it would be good to be more detailed in a full TRP post, but that would take time. I am happy to answer any specific questions.

RicoValentin · 2014-10-01T16:01:43+00:00

AWALT right? Just apply red pill liberally and repeat when necessary.

ProfessorRedPill · 2014-10-04T02:24:24+00:00

1.) There aren't, really.

Sure, I'm giving up banging some young hotties. But I have my own hottie on standby, bang 7-8 times a week with little effort, leaving me with more time to pursue money, hobbies, etc.

Keep in mind, that I'm 40+. If I got rid of this chick that constantly cooks, cleans, and fucks with small efforts on my part, I'd be looking for a new one. I'm not turning down chicks at frat parties every weekend. I made those rounds already, so I know what's out there.

2.) That is really low effort once you know some simple ground rules.

Title	Happily married TRPers how do you do it?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	30
Date	October 1, 2014 2:19 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2hzq9k/happily_married_trpers_how_do_you_do_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/happily-married-trpers-how-do-you-do-it.142530 https://theredarchive.com/post/142530

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