How did I handle this?

LordThunderbolt · 2017-11-15T06:09:52+00:00

Too late, shes not interested. Reread what you wrote. You don't even set up any plan or objective, you just ask her if she's free like you're some kind of serial killer. Is she free for what exactly dude? Free to go feed pigeons at a park? Free to go on a 5 star dinner experience on a yatch? Free to go volunteer at the local shelter? You need to lay the plans out first. What happens when she says yeah shes free, but then u propose some garbage ass date that she doesn't want to go to vecause it sounds lame as fuck? That's why she says "idk". What she's really saying is "I might meet you but it depends on if its not some bullshit date idea that's gonna be boring af and waste my time".

You need to have purpose when you're gonna ask someone out. You need to tell her exactly what u have planned, and you certainly don't ASK if she's free. You simply tell her to join you at the place on a day at a time. If she can't she will propose an alternative. If she's not interested she'll come up with a bs excuse and won't propose an alternative. Dont ask people if they're free, free for what? They don't even know what you're proposing. I mean look at what you wrote; she said shes free Saturday, then u said you'll be free after 7 and stopped right there. Ok fuckboy, you're free after 7, now what? What is that information going to do for her? She's free and you're free, ibguess you two can be free together huh? Wrong. HAVE A PLAN before you even contact her.

EnzoGold · 2017-11-15T04:24:18+00:00

Shes not that into you bro. Next her

Jhushx · 2017-11-15T06:27:47+00:00

People care about details - if all you're suggesting is a day, it's too vague/arbitrary for her. Cut to the chase.

State a specific activity/place/time along with the day you're free. It helps her visualize what you two would be doing and indicates you are comfortable taking charge. Be alpha, esp. with your free time.

I've had women thank me for planning shit out and telling them what we are going to do, bc all they do all day, every day for work/life, is have to plan shit out. Make it easy for her to meet you. If she still playing games, hard next.

When you drive all the time, it's a good feeling to let someone else take the wheel, if they know where you two are going.

MetalDevils · 2017-11-15T06:19:57+00:00

Why the hell didn't you suggest another day/time?

She doesn't seem overly eager to see you anyway, and you both look like you are trying to play this weird power game. Save dominance posture for throwing her onto the bed...when it comes to logistics, you both have to share enough to actually be able to meet up in person.

firstRepublic · 2017-11-15T08:19:10+00:00

She mostly lost interest the moment you asked "you free this week?". She probably gets hundreds of those throughout the week, you need to take charge and get her interested in you. This could come in many forms and one of the ways is to specify what you want to do: e.g. "I think you're cute, let's grab drinks this Saturday" instead of "I'm free @7"

TheStumblingWolf · 2017-11-15T10:02:11+00:00

I suggest you always try and have a plan, and work towards setting it in motion. I try to have like default dates (meet some place, have fun, go for a walk or drinks). Then I change this up a bit depending on the kind of person I'm dealing with.

It would seem we have reached an impasse

Translation: I've given up and don't know what to do

Alright well goodnight

Translation: you're not taking the lead, no longer interested.

rpsatisf · 2017-11-15T09:13:31+00:00

Dude what are you doing. Suggest date, suggest time, suggest activity. Never do this shit again. You can't talk to her like shes your guy friend and youre trying to see if you want to play call of duty or jerk each other off.

Want to x at 9 on Friday? How's 9 for x on Friday? Lets watch x around 6 on Sat? etc etc. Anything.

In my tinder days, my last message to them was "ill send you something dirty so you know its me" and then text a picture of a cute pig or dog rolling in mud. Then I suggest a netflix and chill at their place and work my way back to bowling/arcade and dinner/movie depending on resistance.

You got the next one bro. Just suggest a time place and activity.

krefnasterploc · 2017-11-15T03:12:08+00:00

This bullshit right here reminds me why I exclusively date eastern european women only now. They are actual women not these dick mimicking pricks like you see here. Holy shit man I would have never even responded after she just says no she’s not free and won’t even offer an alternate time to be cordial. You dodged a bullet even man. She sounds horrible if this is first communication attempt

JustJustin121 · 2017-11-15T04:11:46+00:00

She’s barely into you anyways, just move on.

apollosapien · 2017-11-15T04:17:05+00:00

Not good enough. Suggest another date, because a lot of women won't do it for you.

TheRedKeepx · 2017-11-15T06:21:14+00:00

N E X T

Bear-With-Bit · 2017-11-15T08:40:59+00:00

Delete tinder. Approach and game girls IRL. Your rate of success will probably be higher this way.

imn0tg00d · 2017-11-15T16:17:00+00:00

Why do people even bother with tinder? I have like 140 matches and I don't bother messaging them because I'm too busy meeting them in the field. The only thing I use tinder for is the ego boost and to confirm that my smv is high. I swipe sometimes while I'm taking a shit. Other than that, tinder should have no real significance in your life. Tinder is a losing game even if you're in the top 20%. Your message is probably the 30th she got in the last hour. Go out in the real world and bang chicks.

Title	How did I handle this?
Author	sendermahi02
Upvotes	6
Comments	24
Date	November 15, 2017 2:41 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/7d10h4/how_did_i_handle_this/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-did-i-handle-this.118338 https://theredarchive.com/post/118338

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