Negative body image

SovereignSoul76 · 2017-11-17T16:30:17+00:00

Tell her you caught shrapnel all over your torso, while saving a young brown boy from ISIS.

Gawernator · 2017-11-17T16:56:58+00:00

Pain heals, chicks dig scars, glory lasts forever.

185poundsofhatredWIP · 2017-11-17T15:36:35+00:00

Show us. We will either laugh at you and get you desensitized or tell you that it's not that bad.

When you came so far that you're about to reveal your body, she's already made the decision to suck your cock. Harder to sway her into thinking you're disgusting when her vag wants your baby alteady.

mental_models · 2017-11-17T17:15:09+00:00

You just have to deal with it.

Come to terms with your fucked up scars and boils.

This is what your body looks like.

Some people think you look gross.

You've got that shit on your body. Too bad so sad. Now move on and be a fucking man. If a bitch doesn't like it, on to the next one.

Be a valuable man, and there will be plenty of women who don't give a fuck about your scars/boils. When you encounter one who does give a fuck, then you move on to the next one.

Your confidence comes from your survival instinct to make the best of your life regardless of your flaws. AND from your actual value. Your market position.

I'm not scared to spend a stack if my fucking franklin faces are wrinkled. Fuck that. A stack is a stack. I'm getting my $1000 worth out of that shit, because it has a value of $1000.

DiscordantMonk · 2017-11-17T17:11:54+00:00

You know... most woman have negative body images too. It sucks that you have to go through with this, but I doubt it will seriously detract from your interactions. If anything it may help girls feel more comfortable with themselves around you once you show them yourself

NJA4242 · 2017-11-17T17:49:40+00:00

You need to come to terms with your body as it is, it really is unfortunate and probably not the answer you wanted to hear but its about owning it.

Do something that shows it off, buy some tanks for the gym or go swimming and practice by not wearing a shirt at home. Things like this will allow you to be more comfortable in social settings and prepare you for not worrying about it in the presence of women.

WISE_TURD · 2017-11-17T17:54:07+00:00

Just hook up with one of them. ONE. Don't say shit about it, it'll be like you're about to jump into a cold pool - it seems like it'll be worse than it is until you do it. When you hook up with her, don't even mention it, just explore her body.

If this is too much for you, go on a few dates with a chick before doing it.

Really, women's bodies are the stage for sex anyway - you're just the director.

Everyone's self-conscious about something. Stop comparing yourself to brad pitt, although i'm sure even that dude's insecure about something.

Check out "subtle art of not giving a fuck". Especially the part of who you're comparing yourself to. We all need to be reminded of how lucky we are sometimes considering we're well off enough to have electronics to post this sort of thing in the first place.

Check out 21 studios nick sparks talks on youtube. Guy mentions someone who was in a wheelchair getting laid. Pretty sure he was paralyzed from the waist down, but i can't recall. Anyway, that dude has a ltr now. Hope this helps.

atlastic1 · 2017-11-18T01:43:36+00:00

I've had an annoying skin condition as a teenager that left me with purple scar spots, but they are 90% faded now they aren't really noticeable - hopefully yours will too. Was insecure too as a teen when they were really obvious on my arms, but years later in reflection I realised nobody really noticed or cared unless I pointed them out, that's the thing about insecurity it's always worse in your head than in reality.

2comment · 2017-11-17T22:20:30+00:00

Have you tried a low-fat plant based diet? It generally treats many skin conditions to varying degrees.

m0rphing · 2017-11-17T21:11:24+00:00

Looks fine to me dude. Own it and move on with your life.

AcidMal · 2017-11-17T22:18:26+00:00

Listen bro. You are always you’re own harshest critic. Think about that for a second. You are directly responsible for the majority of the grief you are experiencing over this. Is that how you want to treat yourself? If it is, then you wouldn’t be upset about it in the first place. You care about yourself, so behave like it. Try everything you can think of and save for laser treatments. Try to get it covered. Try to find a laser clinic that will work with you. Don’t quit on yourself, thats a bitch move. And for fucks sake do you realize how women think of themselves and how insecure they are? Also, her universe centers on herself, she doesn’t have time to worry about your shit until you bring it up and sound frail and weak willed. Cmon man, you know the drill.

LordThunderbolt · 2017-11-18T02:54:08+00:00

You need to lift harder my man. And get your back and butt waxed dude, you look like a yeti. Lifting is your way out, you need to put more effort in.

nebder · 2017-11-18T06:24:40+00:00

TL;DR- it sucks. It’s your cross to bear. It’s not a dealbreaker. It’s as bad as you yourself make it. A man typically gets one free pass from women for genetic shit he cannot control in my experience.

Hey man. Guess what. I’m thinking I have the same condition you do. I went to a dermatologist in my late teens and got diagnosed with a skin condition that was two words and chronic and no way out of it beyond surgical removal of the symptoms. I call them abscesses instead of boils. Painful as shit growths that flare up semi-regularly. Anyway I forgot the name because it really didn’t fucking matter. The cause was that sometimes I get acne that grows sideways between pores instead of sticking to one pore. Knowing the science is cool, but it doesn’t change the fact that it was the cards I was dealt.

I’m nearing 40 now. I stopped tracking my notch count a long time ago. It was high 60s in my mid 20s before I got into a couple different LTRs that lasted until a year ago. It’s gotta be closer to low 100s by now. This is not a humblebrag. I’m telling you this because I have never once been rejected because of this shit. Been rejected for plenty of other reasons and MAYBE this was the straw that broke the camels back. Doesn’t really matter as there’s still 3.5 billion women out there less the couple hundred that are now in my past and not worth digging up.

My thighs and ass are scarred to shit. Occasionally I’ll get asked something like what’s up with your legs after the fact. I give the same song and dance to her that I just gave you “some skin condition that sometimes gives me abscesses. Kinda sucks but I handle it” deliver it nonchalantly like oh I have brown hair. She’s says something like “oh huh how about that” then the convo drifts off to something else. Sometimes I get some sympathetic/empathetic remark and then shit goes on like whatever no big deal.

Now the biggest worry I had to face was the first time I showed my now ex-wife. We’d fucked a couple times before that but it was my first active flare while with her. I had a massive abscess on my ass cheek. Before we got intimate I said there’s something I have to show you. Showed her the fucking thing and got the oh that looks like it sucks bit. I said yep that’s one way to put it and proceeded to get my bang on. That was the only time I was nervous enough about it to actively show a gal. Guess what she still sucked my cock good and we banged all night.

I was genetically blessed enough to be born with a decent face. (I see pictures of my parents when they were young and they were both attractive people. That’s hard to appreciate when you are young and they are old) I lost my hair early and have a good head shape to have a shaved head. Even in my 20s my natural red qualities got me laid enough to keep me happy tho I still had plenty of blue issues that were fucking me up. This medical issue was sufficiently downplayed by the DGAF it is what it is attitude that it didn’t slow me down. I was skinnyfat on the side of pudgy at best then. I was a fat Nintendo-kid adolescent who lost weight by not overeating but not making an effort to change myself then.

Compensate by lifting and looksmaxing the things you can control. Your pic looked like you were in decent shape and you got that going for you. It’s going to take some positive (actually non negative, it can be neutral) experiences to get this shit to sink into your head. It’s really your own hangup. Every single person has shit they don’t like about their body. Jesus man I cannot tell you how many women have been fucked up cuz one of their tits was bigger than the other. Let alone gals that have their tiger stripes after popping out a kid. Very few people are 100% happy with their bodies. THAT DOESNT STOP YOU FROM BEING COMFORTABLE WITH YOUR BODY.

Let’s talk about the upside to this shit. I stopped going to the general surgeon because 20 years ago it was costing me a couple hundreds bucks a pop to get these abscesses cut and drained. They hurt like a sumbitch until they’re popped. I’ve gained a massive pain tolerance that few men can appreciate. Very few men can appreciate the idea of taking an xacto knife to themselves to address a problem. Yes my druthers would definitely include not having to deal With this shit. Fuck it, it’s part of me.

It sucks. It’s not the end of the world man. I’ve found quite a women that enjoy picking at and cleaning up my bacne. We’re primates man. It’s the same as monkeys grooming their mates. It’s another way to show affection. Find some gal that’s into the dr pimple popper shit and you’re gold man.

topothebellcurve · 2017-11-17T19:01:18+00:00

Dude. Not too bad. Seriously. And the hair is a blessing for you, cause it gives an animal vibe which jives well with scarring. Bottom line, you're right. The issue is in your head.

Heres my body image, head issue:

About 5 years ago i got a bruise on my upper thigh. Small, like a dime. Never went away. Got bigger. Iron stain in the skin from the blood i think. Dermatologist tested, shrugged and said its not a problem unless you decide it is or it gets worse. Probably some vascularity issue below the skin.

Now, like i said, its not so big. Maybe a silver dollar. But its on my thigh, right up there near my cock. So when the pants come off, it's immediately noticable. Draws attention right when she's seeing my junk for the first time. Fucked me up for a bit and made me self consious to the point that i wouldnt be in a glorious state when it's that critical moment. (And that, of course, snowballs)

So at one point i was tipsy with liquid DNGAF, and when a girl pulled down the pants, saw, and inevitably asked, i said, "No, its not a birthmark. A few years ago the devil became jealous of how handsome i had become, came up from hell, and pressed his thumb into my thigh so i wouldn't be perfect." She giggles and I jelly my cock down her mouth.

The next girl i was with, i didn't have dutch courage in me, but i went with the same story, and got the same results. And it worked again with the last girl, too.

So the line is cheezy as fuck, but it defuses the situation and having that in my pocket makes me feel more prepared and confident.

Try to come up with something like that. Maybe it'll work.

Oh, also the second girl I said it to, laughed, but rolled her eyes and said that was corny. It almost rattled me, but i wiggled my eyebrows and went in anyways, and she was into it. When i looked back, i realized that if i broke at the eye roll test, it would have become a failure, so I have to really own the corny.

RecklessLibido · 2017-11-17T19:36:12+00:00

What?

These just look like large acne scars. It's nothing to be ashamed of and it's not that bad. (And why would a girl be inspecting your side flank????)

You need to focus on your skinnyfat physique. It looks like you do lift though so keep lifting boyo and stop being a pussy about minor shit.

PB0034 · 2017-11-17T21:23:52+00:00

Bro let me have your height and chronic disease.

Hope that puts things into perspective.

Icanus · 2017-11-17T21:48:07+00:00

Eat Paleo for three months. See if it gets better.

giggity23 · 2017-11-18T12:03:06+00:00

I am allergic to waxing. I am busy with the lifting tho!

Title	Negative body image
Author	giggity23
Upvotes	12
Comments	43
Date	November 17, 2017 3:27 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/7dloel/negative_body_image/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/negative-body-image.118482 https://theredarchive.com/post/118482

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