Red Pill ideas not Working

Mucl · 2015-03-06T22:27:27+00:00

Started treating her like the child she is.

You cussed at her when she went to put the laptop in your bag (which I assume was a casual / common act). Then you ask her if she wants to put it in your bag later?

You're the one acting like a child.

Stop trying to alter or control others until you have control of yourself. You probably looked like an insecure indecisive man baby acting like that.

redbluepilling · 2015-03-06T23:41:36+00:00

You're bad at this, uncalibrated, and she's going to test the shit out of you to see if you're putting on an act.

Also, right from the start, you're referring to the "relationship's" happiness, not your own. Do you understand how women derive 1. happiness and 2. excitement in a relationship?

Right now she's giving me the worst treatment ever. I ignore it and give her my affection anyway because unconditional man love and bullcrap. I even asked her, "does getting me to apologise mean more to you than giving me affection?".

What the fuck is this shit?

It sounds like you're rationalizing supplication instead of actually ignoring it. With your quote to her, you're clearly trying to elicit her to be more affectionate, and you natively think that by currying up favour you'll receive it in return. You're swinging like a pendulum from one extreme to the other. Too dickish for no good reason (no firm, reasonable boundaries) and then supplicative (giving unwarranted affection / asking to take her laptop later).

Actionable advice: Rather than treating her like a child (since you're acting like a child, bouncing off the edges/extremes, trying to find his way), treat her like the Queen to you being the King. Frame this more positively. Your fake alpha antics aren't working. TRP is. She smells a fake and responds accordingly.

Dreamtrain · 2015-03-06T22:44:18+00:00

You been taking your red pill ideas from /r/thebluepill it seems

ivebeencaught · 2015-03-07T00:25:02+00:00

One Day???? You are worried about one day? Stop trying to manipulate her into changing. Go and make fundamental changes to better yourself, forget about doing this to change her.

Start lifting, there is a reason you will hear this a million times and when you do it you will find out what that reason is (hint: it rhymes with jingles.) WAX ON/WAX OFF just do it. Don't expect any serious changes in her until your results from lifting are observable, this can take months. (one day....pfffft)

Frame is not a power struggle, this isn't about you tricking or wrestling control away from her. When you have properly established frame she will willingly give control to you. Yes she will still shit test you, but these shit tests are about checking to see if you are still worthy of having control. (In fact, EVERY shit test you get is about seeing if you are worthy to be in control) This is a complete change of attitude for you. It took me reading EVERYTHING in the sidebar (twice) here and all the things in /r/theredpill sidebar before I even started to understand the changes that I needed to make. (one day...)

Practice the skills that are provided until you have them mastered (meaning you could teach them to someone else without outside help or supplemental materials). (one day.....)

Once you have done these steps and if you still haven't seen any results from her, then you can start worrying about if this works.

pheonixignition · 2015-03-06T22:08:00+00:00

Two possibilities: you're going overboard and being a straight asshole. Obviously you should know that adjusting it correctly takes time, and you won't be perfect.

Alternatively, you're taking back power. She's not going to willingly give it back. She wants to know you're straight up, and not going to revert.

oldredder · 2015-03-06T22:54:40+00:00

Sandman is redpill-MGTOW so his concern isn't keeping women around.

You have to understand the nuance of being self-respecting and respectful to the girl to keep her around. If you can't understand you're pissing her off on purpose you're the problem.

If she can't understand that she's only happy by disrespecting you, making you apologize when you didn't do anything, you shouldn't keep her around because you're a door-mat and you don't belong together.

BiggestDickInTheRoom · 2015-03-06T23:26:50+00:00

In addition to the other comments, the reason you aren't seeing results is that she doesn't believe you have passed the shit test yet, because you haven't. She believes that you put your foot down to test her, likely because you read that you should somewhere, which you did. She thinks that if she pushes harder for an apology and holds out that you will second guess yourself, which you are as demonstrated by your question. She believes that if she persists that she will eventually get an apology and bring back your old behavior.

You are in an LTR with someone who knows you well. She doesn't believe that you permanently changed your behavior and she will shit test you long and hard when you elicit new behaviors to see if you are for real or not. It won't end until she is satisfied she can't elicit the old behaviors. How long this will take is entirely dependent on how ingrained she believes these behaviors to be.

let_terror_reign · 2015-03-07T02:42:07+00:00

You're not following TRP, you were just being a dick. And one day? Dude, don't just follow what's written here when this is a two year LTR. You gotta ramp up the alpha in an LTR. Slowly.

DAD_FISTER · 2015-03-06T22:43:24+00:00

You need to read married man sex life primer. The dynamics change a lot when you have been in a relationship for as long as you have. Fact is, you're going to have a lot harder time in a wide range of areas and a much easier time in some other areas.

At the end of the day, the issue is most likely that you have no frame with this girl. You have to bring it and it isn't going to be easy. In MMSLP, it states right at the beginning that you have to accept that the relationship is going to end with the changes you make. If you truly want to fix it then you have to completely change yourself, which is a nuclear option.

Sesa_Refum · 2015-03-07T04:17:25+00:00

She's beating you bad at the manipulation game, you need to be more firm.

You have to understand better how people (females) manipulate men. Look at the 48 Laws of Power, I think the 2nd or 3rd law says "Learn to use enemies" because enemies will work harder. This is combined with the (10th or so) law that tells you to make others come to you.

By building enemity between you she hoping you'll come crawling back to her when she withdraws that affection, and you played right into hands.

Women are cheeky and evil and what's more is they love to play manipulation games like that 24/7, especially with a worthy adversary. You need to read the sidebar or sum'n if you wanna make it.

marriagefucked · 2015-03-07T04:34:33+00:00

Yesterday she tried putting her laptop in my sling bag. Jokingly I said, "the fuck you doing?" She looked visibly displeased and pulled her laptop out and walked away. Shit test. Okay. Didn't think too much of it.

How is that a shit test?

fenhongyaowan · 2015-03-06T22:09:03+00:00

She said no. Why should you apologize?

alexinikita · 2015-03-07T04:29:08+00:00

I don't get why people equate TRP with treating people like shit...you can have self respect and respect others at the same time. Pouncing on your girl for trying to put a laptop in your bag is stupid

mormon-nigger · 2015-03-07T03:05:20+00:00

why did you have to apologize so much in the first place? What were you doing? you probably shouldn't be doing those things that would warrant an apology in the first place.

If you two are living together and you start acting like a different person it is going to be as obvious as night and day. You need to gradually bring ideas into your life as they apply and don't just try to flip a switch.

Title	Red Pill ideas not Working
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	7
Comments	25
Date	March 6, 2015 10:02 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2y6ib7/red_pill_ideas_not_working/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/red-pill-ideas-not-working.191725 https://theredarchive.com/post/191725

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