Why does female promiscuity upset men?

raisins3142 · 2017-04-17T04:19:50+00:00

It is contextual in some way.

I'll ask this. Why does garbage smell "bad" to you but other animals eat it? It's because we have evolved an aversion to things not healthy for us.

So, a slutty woman probably carries disease. In the past, before condoms, it was probably guaranteed. So, that might be the innate aversion in most men.

But as I said it is also contextual. I feel near physical revulsion at the thought of being in a serious relationship with a woman that was/is promiscuous (beyond question promiscuous, so has passed any reasonable threshold,an example is a woman that is 30 and has fucked over 100 men). Of course there are social reasons, like people will look down on me and the guys that have fucked her will snicker. But it is also likely it is an evolved response to keep me from being cuckolded. Add in that I know that she will likely make my life hell. I don't feel nearly the same revulsion to casually sleeping with a slut.

Slutty women were once considered failures as women. People generally agreed that it was no accomplishment for a woman to get fucked by a ton of dudes and that it decreased her value and spoke ill of her upbringing and general physical and mental health. Why was this the dominant view for most of human history but is now supposedly changed in the last few decades?

RPAlternate42 · 2017-04-17T05:47:10+00:00

Speaking hypothetically, considering I'm married:

It's not the promiscuity so much as sudden "I'm not that kind of girl" attitude promiscuous girls get once they get an LTR or married... the old I married a whore who fucks like a prude trope.

All things being equal between two girls and one has an n-count of 35 and the other has an n-count of 5... I'll take the 5-count over the 35 count because the 5 count is likelt 5 + 10 dicks in the mouth and the 35 is probably 70 with at least as many dicks in the mouth.

Analogy: There are two Dodge Vipers sitting in front of you... both are 2016 models. Same exact trim... everything the same. They look exactly the same inside and out. The only difference is that one has 7,500 miles on it and the other has 22,500 miles on it. Which do you choose?

Promiscuity also speaks to her decision-making abilities and her likely lifestyle choices. A girl with a very high n-count doesn't get that count when she is stone-cold sober. She gets that count, partly, as a result of her constant lowered inhibitions. So promiscuity leans towards party girl. Party girl implies she lives in the now instead of thinking about consequences and the future. She likely operates mostly on feels and less on the reals. Her failed "relationships" are likely a result of her rash decision-making ability and the ever-used excuse of (along the lines of) "he's just a friend... nothing happened."

A promiscuous girl usually means being in public with her will result in you seeing and meeting every guys she was fucking on the reg before "settling" with you.

"This is my friend Chad. Chad, this is my boyfriend."

You'll hear:

"This is one of the dicks I had in me a few days before I met you."

Of course I'm generalizing, but you get the point.

Also consider: if a girl's attitude is "it's just sex" then why would she feel the need to lie about how many times she's had it (and trust me, she's lying about something.)

Now, of course, all that was about LTRs and such. If your plate is promiscuous... who the fuck cares? She's a plate. Her job is to be promiscuous. Unless you are looking for an LTR it shouldn't fucking matter.

sonder_one · 2017-04-17T03:32:37+00:00

If we're talking LTRs, it's because women's sexual history has a proven negative correlation with LTR-suitability.

Dolphinfucker · 2017-04-17T01:14:37+00:00

Most guys don't want to raise Chad's kids.

blackedoutfast · 2017-04-17T02:39:59+00:00

sluts are awesome, just don't marry one.

the guys who get so butthurt over sluts slutting haven't really swallowed the redpill.

hawkeaglejesus · 2017-04-17T15:52:19+00:00

We as humans value strength over weakness. Those who lack self control are weak, and on a subconscious level we know they are harmful to the tribe.

This applies to any vice. Sluts are the same as alcoholics, junkies, and the 300lb dude that eats 20 big macs a week.

bonerfleximus · 2017-04-17T16:09:02+00:00

It's because TRP at its foundation is a group of guys who wanted to fuck sluts and couldn't, or fell in love with a slut only to learn the truth. The pain of this experience gave them emotional incentive to explore and define the unspoken rules that govern the sexual landscape and revealed many truths.. but the philosophy is still one founded on avoidance of that which hurt them.

Most guys who feel inclined to spend their valuable time posting in TRP are driven to do so by that same anger/pain that got them here in the first place. Once you're out of the anger phase there's little incentive to linger here so most of us just go on about our lives. Some stick around because they find purpose in it, make money from it (bloggers), or are standing in line to cross the border and bored out of their mind (me).

Take all advice you receive here with a grain of salt and realize that there's truth in much of what's said here but it's probably coming from someone whose still hurting and trying to figure out why and what they can do about it.

Kalidane · 2017-04-17T00:57:07+00:00

Because in the Disney movie most guys want to be in, a Princess doesn't suck dick in the DJ booth.

Because these guys are doing what society tells them is good but they never get the girl. But obviously plenty of other guys are nailing these girls.

Because any GF they might have is like that too.

All of these paths lead to cognitive dissonance and a very strong need to deny the evidence or explain it away. Accepting the evidence is too psychically painful.

The brain will work very hard to maintain the illusions most people need to get by from day to day.

Pitchfork51 · 2017-04-17T06:02:51+00:00

Doesn't bother me. Love getting laid.

Wouldn't LTR a slutty chick. Its hardwired into our brains for a reason. Girls wouldn't be hiding it if they didn't know it isn't ideal for locking up a dude.

TheRedStoic · 2017-04-17T11:30:57+00:00

Biology and common sense.

a girl who sleeps around is less likely to be faithful and bond, and less likely that you'll be raising your actual kids. (Biology).
women are the gate keepers of sex and babies, a lock opened by a ton of keys is a shitty lock. A key that opens many locks is a master key. (Common sense).

You can go much further with actual stats and studies, pair bonding, sexual science, etc, but they're barely necessary. Most everyone understands this apriori it's built into us since our amount of time on this Earth with reliable cheap contraception has been incredibly short, we haven't evolved to catch up, maybe we should, maybe not, I don't really care either way.

Tldr, the why isn't that important since you can't negotiate attraction.

oldredder · 2017-04-17T04:38:00+00:00

it's a fundamental issue of men, all men, that women not be with other men. It's hard-wired instinct. This evolved most likely because disease and offspring are important: men need not to be killed by STDs or made ill and also need to ensure they invest their time in raising children that are NOT OTHER MEN's but with promiscuous women it often will be some other man's child

quicklogaccount · 2017-04-17T01:15:18+00:00

Most of the guys that are disgusted by sluts here are disgusted because they have pussy and women on a pedestal and find themselves disgusted when the pussy is cheap. These guys are bound to learn a hard lesson. Pussy IS cheap, and an expensive or rare pussy doesn't make a woman valuable. Life gives this lesson through a lot of different fashions, the guys that learn it in a single blow ("turns out she is a whore" posts) are lucky. This lesson can be a lot more confusing.

Many of them used TRP to justify their tradcon biases and ignored the bit about women being naturally promiscuous, or maybe they came to believe the tradcon marriage arrangement (often addressed as marriage 1.0) is the ideal and "should be forced to work".

Now, this isn't the same thing as saying that sluts are good to go. They're more demanding of their partners, more confident on their ability to swing, they see less value on benefits their SOs provided in the past (Briffault's s law applies in a worse fashion), they're often both more skilled in using social pressure to tune down attraction and build an environment for children (betafying) and less hesitant in acting in a AF/BB fashion. If the slut is also intelligent the chances are (actually, it actually becomes LIKELY in most environments) that she is unnaturally skilled in lying and appealing to sympathy.

On the vast majority of the cases whether she was a slut or not isn't a valuable information. As always, what matters is whether she is shitty or not, not what made her shitty. You will notice that she sucks and you will leave her. The additional information about her slutiness only serves for you to protect your ego, and a low count isn't a reason to stay with a sub par partner.
The exception to be granted are intelligent and slutty women. They'll play nice and betafy without triggering any warning alert in most guys, and only when it is too late the guy will see the train wreck he's into.

vodkamonsta · 2017-04-17T00:55:23+00:00

It doesn't, sluts are great. Loaded question equals loaded response, the only dudes that are mad about it aren't mad that people are fucking, it's that they aren't fucking them.

That or some poor dude got attached to a slut.

Also, stop slut shaming because as I said, sluts are great!

sampsonstar698 · 2017-04-18T16:20:18+00:00

its not annoying when you're in the queue ;D

Willow-girl · 2017-04-17T12:04:58+00:00

Is it because I live in scarcity and am jealous at her innate value?

Yeah, I think so. Less insecure men don't seem to give a damn. I have never had a man inquire as to my N-count.

Title	Why does female promiscuity upset men?
Author	empatheticapathetic
Upvotes	10
Comments	30
Date	April 17, 2017 12:35 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/65sgkv/why_does_female_promiscuity_upset_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/why-does-female-promiscuity-upset-men.89616 https://theredarchive.com/post/89616

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