Alpha Vs. Beta: The Fight for Control

I'm going to break this down real simple.

What makes the difference between an alpha and a beta?

You're probably wondering why some people are born alpha and why some people are born beta. It's also likely that you're wondering if it's possible to switch between the two. The answer is YES—it's absolutely possible.

It may come as a surprise to you that most so-called "alphas" don't actually have a reason for why they are "alpha" and likely could not replicate or teach someone how to be an "alpha outside of situational circumstance.

In this post, I am going to outline the true nature of an alpha male versus the beta male.

Obvious traits

Lets first take a look at the obvious trait of an alpha male so that we can establish the definition.

By definition, an alpha male is: the most dominant, powerful, or assertive man in a particular group¹

According to this definition, an alpha male would assume in most situations a role of power. In any given social dynamic a role of power must be established to aid in the action the individuals take as an entity. This means that within the first couple of minutes (or seconds) a person who holds their "frame" for the longest will automatically be attained power by the social group.

Contrary to popular belief, this is more easily said than done.

Determining Your Position

Determining whether you are an alpha male does not have to do with others in your environment — it has to do with yourself.

If you have doubted yourself in the past or if you doubt yourself regularly it is very likely that you are a beta male.

Let's take a look at some examples:

• Let's say you want to make money but you are in doubt. You say it's because you do not have the skillset to make more money but the reality is that a lot of people who make money are not as smart as you and don't have skills that are commonly thought as necessary to make money.
• Let's say you want to get a girlfriend but you don't think that girls are interested in you. You think it's because girls think of you a certain way by default but the reality is that many men who date beautiful women have no real charm. They are very normal and borderline boring/ugly.
• Let's say you want to become a person who is dominant in social environments — when you walk in a room you control it. You think that people don't think of you as controlling, so this becomes your default position when you enter these rooms. The reality is that people who dominate social environments don't even have anything to back them up — they just do. If you take a closer look, most "alpha" males are not smart, talented, or good looking.

Determining your position is an awareness of self. Determining your position is a decision of self-perception.

Overcoming Your Default

So if you've read this far you're probably wondering how you can switch to an alpha male instantaneously — you know it's a decision and you're not sure how to make the decision to become an alpha.

This is your problem. I in no way, shape or form do I mean this in a philosophical way. I mean it quite literally.

This is your problem.

To become an "alpha" male one must decide that they are an "alpha" male.

Whatever the definition of "alpha" is to you, you must embody it.

Easier said than done, although it is the only way.

You must decide that you are going to decide for the rest of your life.

Language Is Your Biggest Obstacle

Once you realize that "alpha" male is just a label inside of your head, you will no longer be in competition with anyone.

Realize that you are the only one living this movie called life. You are the only one experiencing your experience. If you decide to let someone decide for you, you will never be in control of your life.

So how does one decide to take control of their life? Take control of your language.

Most people think that language is something that makes us all the same — but it is quite the contrary. Language is the only thing that divides humans from being one with one another. This has been a problem since the evolution of man.

If one would like to overcome the obstacles they have in their head they must realize that they are self-invented.

Understanding Your Language

To understand your own language you must understand where it came from.

Your language was given to you, but it is not you. This must be clear if you want to start making decisions.

Make a clear decision that it is not your language. You did not create it and it is not something that you need to use.

If you can become someone who is independent of all necessities that the social group determines as necessary, you are the leader of the group by default. If you do not need to communicate the only person you communicate with is yourself.

Once understood you can now use your language for you.

Start to use language as a way of manipulating your world rather communicating with it. Why would you communicate with something if you could move it with your free will? This is alpha

A real alpha male is independent of the social group but uses it for their own benefit.

Inner Language Vs. Outer Language

The inner language of a beta male sounds like this:

• I can't do this
• People think this of me (negative assumption)
• Why don't people like me
• Why can't I do things properly
• I don't feel like I'm enough

The inner language of an alpha male sounds like this:

• I can do this
• I am perfect and everyone believes this
• People LOVE me
• I do everything perfectly
• I'm enough

It is clear that a person who is beta has no control over how they feel about themselves because they always outsource their self worth to something out of their control.

It is clear that a person who is alpha has complete control over their feelings of themselves because they are the ones determining how they feel about themselves.

The outer language of a beta male sounds like this:

• Okay
• So what do you want to do?
• Do you want to do this? (assuming the other person doesn't want to)
• Do I have to?
• or Any form of agreement with the outside world

The outer language of an alpha male sounds like this:

• No
• So, are you going to come over to my place?
• So, when are we going to do this (assuming the person already wants to do said thing)
• I'm not going to do that

It is clear that an alpha male decides based on his own free will and a beta male decides based on fear aversion and things not in his control.

Transitioning From Alpha To Beta

This transition is extremely easy if you let it. Read this next line over and over again until it is something you live by;

Alpha males have boundaries, beta males do not.

This may sound to simple to be true but it is the reality.

If you hold your ground, you will be alpha in all situations. There is obvious situations where you will need to let go of getting the outcome you want, although this is more based on acting out of integrity with core values rather than lack of motivation.

A real alpha male is okay with himself in all situations — this goes back to the fact that real alpha males are most commonly ugly, not smart, and not special.

The reality is that an alpha male dominates their environment — but the key is to know which environment you will choose to put yourself in.

Are you going to put yourself in situations where people disrespect you? Don't value your time? Treat you like nothing? Or are you going to respect yourself and only surround yourself with people who treat you like you're the best thing on planet earth?

Control Isn't A Fight

This comes back to my title: Alpha VS. Beta: The Fight For Control. A real alpha male does not fight. A real alpha male makes decisions based on their own values. A beta male doesn't even have values to make decisions on because they are living on the values of the social group. They are acting out a script instead of writing it.

Are you going to write your own script?

What are your values?

Are you ready to make a decision?

This decision will determine the fate of your entire life. You are not at the effect but the cause.

Life was created for you to experience.

This is your movie.

You do not fight for control because you are already in control.

You're in control of your own life not of the people around you.

You do not give up because of your environment, you continue because it's your decision. You do not get upset because a girl doesn't like you because she must be silly to not like someone who is so amazing.

Everything in your life is perfect and when you realize that it will reflect back to you. Why? It is simply because if you believe that you are perfect and decide that you are perfect you can actively make that decision again.

If you believe you are amazing you will not spend time with people who believe you are not amazing because it's not part of your reality and you do not actively accept these things in your life.

Start Now

Last but not least — start now.

A real alpha does not wait.

You are always at ground zero but with every decision you make your awareness of integrity grows.

This will allow you to see yourself in ways you never thought were possible.

Act when you have an opportunity you desire to act upon because this is what a decision-maker does.

Make decisions for you, make decisions for others, make decisions for anything and everything that presents itself to you because you are the one in control.

​

LINKS:

¹https://www.dictionary.com/browse/alpha-male