Hello all! I’m documenting my experiences and also trying to gain some insight into the world of seduction. Few nights ago I went to a club for the first time and had an amazing experience. Today I wanted to try cold approaching for the first time. I didn’t really know where to start so I just went to a college campus near me and started walking around.

First approach: Me: “Excuse me, I’m not from around here do you know where X is?” Her: gave directions Me: “you have nice earrings” or something along that line. “What was your name, I’m X” “nice to meet you” bla bla bla Continued small talk for 20 seconds. Nothing deep or flirty. Literally “you a student here? cool what year? Very basic and again NOT flirty at all… Me: “we should go get coffee sometime, can I grab your number?” Her: “ahh yeah sure” she put it in the name slot accidentally and told me she messed up giving it to me. Me: well it was nice meeting you… AND I FORGOT HER NAME. Guys you don’t know how stupid I feel. Some very significant detail and I couldn’t remember it… didn’t make the same mistake next time. I wanted to go in for a brief hug but felt like that’d be very creepy so we just parted ways.

Second Approach. Me: “Excuse me I’m not from around here do you know where x is?” Her: “oh yeah it’s right over here, (proceeds to walk me about 500 feet across the park. Me: “oh wow you’re gonna show me? thanks you have really pretty eyes” We had basic small talk along the way, found out what major and year she was, she asked some things about me bla bla bla. She also told me a lot more about the specific area between x and where we were” so more of her just being nice. Me: “cool thanks for showing me, can I grab your number? We should grab coffee sometime. Her: now her response sounds like she was hesitant at first but then said something like “yeah or if you need any other help finding your way around” Got her number and thanked her for the directions, made sure I said her name so she knew I remembered it and we parted ways.

I texted both already and said something along the lines of “hey I found the x and x. Really enjoyed talking to you, we should grab coffee sometime this week” So even though I really didn’t want to text them because they were the first two numbers I got I don’t feel like I’ve done anything substantial. I didn’t flirt, I literally asked for directions… because I felt so damn awkward… although these were my first two approaches. There wasn’t any escalation and I didn’t make a lot of eye contact I will definitely try to do that next time but as for my initial approach I think I need a better opener because this one doesn’t really convey what I want which is to basically see where it goes and meet more people.

Something I feel I need to do more of is to not be so timid, it’s really cold where I’m at so this is a barrier since people are very covered up and I can’t truly see their style. I did compliment the first girl on her earrings and the second on her eyes so I think that was good. I just need to be more honest and say “I appreciate you giving me directions but I really just wanted an excuse to talk to you” maybe that’s too strong. This is definitely a lot different than being at a bar or club where talking is expected. It just felt so foreign and wrong. I also had all the people in this group who are against cold approaches in the back of my mind saying “you’re a creep for wanting to talk to this girl” I’ve got a lot of stuff to work on but overall I guess I just need more practice.

Also not sure if this fits into the FR flair or if it should be something else