I'm not really one of the jealous types, but recently its been creeping up on me and I'm not sure what to do in this situation. To be honest I feel like a total looser even writing this up since it sounds so soppy and stupid but here it goes.

I stopped talking to alot of people and friends in the past 8 months due to school. In this case it was for the better. I cut out alot of people that downgraded me, focused on myself and school. I also read up on a shit ton of seduction material and really improved my game, myself and my confidence in my voice as well as being confident with girls. Suddenly when school is out, I had this non-give-a-fuckability I was always looking for and having the best time going out anywhere I went. Sweet. You could say I have become a new person with this new found respect for myself. The biggest thing was I was outcome independent, thats when I started picking up alot of numbers and new friends.

Recently met up with my best friend which I haven't seen in a while. Tall studly dude, somewhat of a natural, love the dude like my own brother. Haven't seen the man in a while and a recent trip we laid the mac down hard. Picking girls up everywhere, having a good time, being the life of the party. Although my game was definitely miles ahead of anything I have ever had, I still felt like my friend was "winning." Back home he told me hes got a couple plates spinning and he can get it anytime. Sometimes I can help to feel like physical appearance has something to do with it, although when I said something to him about it, he told me he had going through alot of game material and also studying up on his game.

Another friend, tall, studly dude, also love the dude like a brother. Has been working on his game and also gets laid once in a while. In fact we frequently outwardly discuss techniques, material and game plans. But he still gets laid more than me. Even if it is once a month or two.

I have some other friends, even they are getting some casual play.

I'm battling the feeling of always loosing at this game. As a competitive athlete all my life, it burns so badly to not win. I don't know if I want to call it winning or loosing, but that's the way it feels. At one point it was great feeling free of any outcome and having a good time, but seeing as how my closest peeps are clocking in the tickets, this feeling is setting in.

Although I love my friends dearly and value them much. I can't feel helpless in the fact that all the confidence that I built up in the last few months that I prize so dearly in order to have success with women is gradually getting worn away unconsciously by their success. And its a vicious circle of unsuccess with women, when your confidence gets low, I know this. but when I should be happy for them, I just want to be like what the fuckkkkkkk. On paper I know I'm everything I should be but in reality I just can help to feel like there's some missing piece. To be honest I need to get some tally marks going.

Anyways, I hope someone could give me some insight, I can't be the only one in the same situation.