Breaking the "nice guy" mindset

Kenic_In_MD · 2017-06-22T03:12:01+00:00

Good question, I have a bit of a baby face so people simply look at me and label me as a "Nice guy" or a "Gentleman" it's frustrating as shit. All I can say is be yourself, if you don't turn her on by being you. Being a fake version of you isn't going to do it either. I am probably wrong though.

RashErrAtik · 2017-06-22T03:22:05+00:00

I would say maybe try being assertive and dominant without being overbearing. This also has to do with confidence. People can feel how confident you are without you even opening your mouth.

Trying to fix your mindset is a step in the right direction. Strive to be someone that leaves others in awe or someone that demands their following.

UndidIridium · 2017-06-22T04:36:06+00:00

Say, "thank you."

Clearly the context of those women is that they are from a point of ignorance; believing the stereotype that "fighters" are "mean assholes." You can thank the Boxing/MMA advertisements (and the like) for that.

Also, when they told you that you are a "nice guy," the very likely mean that you seem like a nice person, and not the "nice guy" term defined as someone who "is nice to women expecting reciprocation."

This is a non-issue. Treat it as such. Maintain your frame.

luaudesign · 2017-06-22T11:45:48+00:00

Defending and qualifying yourself is a terrible response, and asking "why?" is not challenging enough, and it still focuses on yourself as the subject. To make her qualify herself you gotta make her the subject and playfully accuse her of something. Swap your "Why?" for "Oh... so you've been secretly judging me the whole time, uh? You're that kind of person...", let her invest, then show that you forgive it by reframing her from a judge to a detective making deductions and do some more roleplay out of it. Make her tell you what else she was thinking of you, or begin by guessing stuff of people you can see around and then make her do the same.

marthdotsk · 2017-06-22T14:47:03+00:00

" oh, but you're such a nice guy"

"Perhaps not as much as you think I am."

People tend to look at things as dichotomies. As if there can only be two options for any given situation, when nothing can be further from the truth. And trying to reason with these people, who in my opinion are just intellectually lazy, is more often than not a pointless endeavor.

You are what you want to be, not what they tell you.

As for dispelling the nice guy mindset itself, as long as you begin to start owning your shortcomings and work on them, and not let anyone disrespect you, you're on the right track.

savagesteve_13 · 2017-06-22T03:57:42+00:00

Don't get defensive about it. If she thinks you're not the boxing type don't challenge her on it, just say "yep, let me show you a move or two". Thats called making it fun and interesting, versus making her feel bad for even having an opinion about it. Thats what "nice" guys do, get all moody and insult a woman and wonder why she doesn't come back for a 2nd date.

kalolilo · 2017-06-22T08:30:11+00:00

Say "yes I'm very sweet and give her a kiss on the cheek."

When girls test you, they give you permission to escalate.

Title	Breaking the "nice guy" mindset
Author	InexperiencedChap
Upvotes	7
Comments	15
Date	June 22, 2017 2:44 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6iqq4m/breaking_the_nice_guy_mindset/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/breaking-the-nice-guy-mindset.1429313 https://theredarchive.com/post/1429313

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