Hello Seddit. Ill try and get to the point and hope to hear yall's feedback. Some background about me:

 

I am 25M, 6'2", slim, shy, introverted and quiet. Alright looking, but kinda handsome on a good day. I had one gf from ages 16-21. Skip forward a few years and I am 25 and have been on maybe 7-8 dates with 4 different girls, made out with a couple of girls at bars (after a couple of drinks lol) and only 1 one night stand in that 4 year span. As you can see I'm not super experienced. Mostly due to my timid and quiet personality.

 

One July night in 2023, I see a girl (26F) that went to my highschool, followed me on Instagram (never actually saw her in person as she was a grade older, but knew of her due to knowing some of her friends. Have known about her since prolly 2012, not sure if she knew about me). Anyways, it turns out a close friend in my social circle was talking to her and she apparently had a crush on him. I didn't think too much of it and didn't think about her until a couple of weeks later my friend mentions he ghosted her cus she wanted to text everyday lol I was just like "tuffff" and forgot about her again. Then in mid November I see her friends at the same party, but don't think too much about it. Then at the end of November when she randomly slides in my DM's talking about some "hi :)" lmao. I am caught off guard since she's really pretty and had been talking to my more handsome friend (though it was very short and nothing serious, they didn't even meet).

 

So we text and all is good, she's an all right conversator (I'm also a meh conversator). Problem is she would send me these long ass paragraphs and I would match her energy and do the same. But I would reply every 2-3 hours (sometimes up to 5-7) as I didn't want to run out of things to say before meeting her, and I also dislike texting. 90% of the time she would reply within an hour. She mentioned some Christmas lights going on and I tell her we should go together the following weekend to see them. She says she's down but can't that weekend since she'll be out of town so she offers another day. I say cool, that works. We text in the same pattern for another week and I pick her up, go to a restaurant in downtown and then look at the lights. Overall date was decent, has some decent conversations although there were some moments of quietness. However it didn't feel too awkward when that happened. I drop her off and she later texts me thanking her for a "great night" and that she was sorry work and her slight sickness had to cut it early (we hanged out for about 4-5 hours). I say its all good no worries.

 

We hang out three more times. She actually planned the dates before I could do it (I feel like I fucked up letting her take the lead here and not taking initiative faster) or would bring something up and I would say something like "we should go". Date #2 was the best one, good conversation and time flies with her. Various activities. Date #3 was a movie date, it was good but didn't talk as much as previous due to watching the movie. But still had a good time. We watched the new hunger games movies since in the previous date we had a brief conversation about how I used to be into that and I guess she remembered and found out it was in theaters lol. Then we had Date #4 was a sunday brunch date, which was an alright one. conversation not as fluid as previous dates but nothing really negative occurred either.

 

At this point we had been talking for a little over a month, with the similar texting pattern but also texting her shorter conversations having quicker reply timing on my end, to make texting more doable and similar to previous relationships I had. She mentions she has a job interview (she's a nurse) on Monday. I wish her goodluck that same day and then on Tuesday she finds out she got the job. I was genuinely happy for her. Then I notice over the next two days her replies take longer to come but they aren't dry so I don't think much of it, I'm actually relieved I can catch a bit of a breather. On Thursday we text, i tell her goodnight and the next day she doesn't reply all day, despite posting stories on IG. Deep down I had a feeling she was gonna try and ghost me now but I said fuck it and double texted her. She replies within 10 minutes and the conversations continue as if nothing happened. Then over the next 2-3 days her replies take longer and she continues to be active on IG despite leaving me on delivered. Until she finally stops replying on night and I decide not to pursue any longer

 

It's been exactly a month since we last talked and I see her posting stories on IG as if nothing happened. So much so, that I decide to just stop watching them all together to spare my feelings. I am left wondering what I did wrong? was is wrong with me? Am I too skinny for her? Am I too boring? Am I not good looking enough?

 

Some things worth mentioning. I have been told by previous dates that they couldn't tell if I was enjoying my time or not. Probably because of my calm, and timid nature. I'm not too expressive by default but I do genuinely enjoy my time with people. I also stalked her socials (i know, i know ... beta move smh lol) and saw that her ex is part of her large friend group. From what I can tell they seem to have the same mutual friends and I guess see each other in these large gatherings. But she seems to mostly hangout with the same 2-3 gf's. I feel like I also wasn't able to feel completely comfortable around her (both in person and text), due to my own insecurities and I feel like maybe she had moments where she felt the same idk tbh. I also committed another mistake that I realized after perusing this subreddit and that is I did not break the touch barrier at all. Literally made 0 moves. She would give me a hug in the car before leaving and that was it. I did try and flirt with her over text but didn't do it much in person.

 

I've gotten ghosted before but I usually did not give a shit because I did not care for the girl, but this is my first time fumbling a baddie and I am legit losing my marbels wondering what I did wrong, what I said wrong, what I should've done etc... I legit wish she would come back.

 

If you've made it this far. Any advise would be greatly appreciated!

 

TLDR: Pretty girl slides in my DM's. I take her out on 4 dates. I fumbled her. Probably by being too pussy to make a move and be a leader. She ghosted me and now im sad