Hey comrades!

I have a little story for my fellows here. I will talk about what I did and what I think that could need improvement and I also have a few questions.

Short backstory. I'm a 19 year old programmer who lived his entire life very introverted. When I was 17 I already got nervous when I had to talk to a doctor or a cashier. I was a fucking coward. I also have had a relationship of 2 years. This changed in August and that was when I decided I would turn my life 180 degrees. I literally changed everything about me. I started working out, changed my garderobe and developed a style that I think suits me. I got a new haircut and I also try to learn something new everyday. I changed everything about me what I hadn't liked.

So today I had planned to go out with a few friends, nothing special. I didn't go out yesterday so I really was looking forward to today. Suddenly my friends decided that they had other plans or became sick or whatever. Only me and a couple were left and I decided that i don't want to be the third wheel, so I left them. The old me would have been driving home. Then I thought, I could go to a cafe and just drink one or two cups.

So here comes my tip for all of you. I have developed a rule which I apply to every decision in my life. When I think of something which has options, I don't let my mood choose the answer. I ask myself:

If I talk with someone about my decision, which one would include the most interesting story?

The answer was easy. I drove to the city and went into a cafe. I just sat on an empty spot quite in the middle of the cafe and ordered some cup. I saw that there were many couples, but also one group of girls. I wanted to talk to them, but I decided that I would finish my cup first. But what about my rule? That wasn't the most interesting story. So I started to talk with the bartenders and then also kind of approached a girl which sat down not far away from me. I don't count that as an approach, since I only exchanged a few words. She was kind of stressed. Most of the time I was exchanging messages on my smartphone.

Then, finally, I paid and went straight to the group of girls. There was no special opener or anything. I just said the words that came into my mind. I have to say that I was nervous as fuck. I had extreme problems to have a conversation with them. Eventually I cooled down and got the conversation rolling. I must say it was pretty easy to talk with them. First they were also quite shocked that someone sat right next to them and started talking. However, after some time it was normal. There's also nothing special here to tell you guys.

After some while I decided to go and I wanted to get a number from one special girl with who I had most fun with. I grabbed my handy and gave it to her and said "I have to go, but I want you to give me your number. You seem very interesting. Let's hang out some time." She then said that she wasn't comfortable with that because she was in a relationship. However, I didn't care about that. I had no intention to get her to be my girlfriend or whatever. All I wanted was to meet new people and get to know them. I just straight out told her that and so she agreed to write down her name for me, so that I could add er on facebook. Well, not what I really wanted, but whatever. I also got the "names" of the other girls, but I think because of my horrible line they felt excluded and so I don't even know if I should even talk to them on facebook.

What have I learned? Just get out of your comfort zone. JUST DO IT. It's fucking easy. Even though I might not have had the best conversation, I had fun and I approached. I got it rolling. In the future it will be much easier for me to approach. I also have to say that I went there solo. It doesn't matter.

Now the question. When I like one girl out of a group, would it be better to ask every girl about their numbers, so that I get to have options? Now I feel like I could just talk a bit with the one girl I liked, but she is of course not letting me get to close with her, because she is in a relationship. I also would never ever want to destroy a relationship. AND I'm also not the type of guy who likes one night stands. I want a long lasting relationship. But I'm not forcing anything here, I like to meet people and just talk with them.

Any advice?

TL;DR Went out first time solo and also approached first time. Got the ball rolling.