How can I stop being goody shoes.

Alarmed_Box1198 · 2025-10-22T02:28:49+00:00

You have to take risks to get what you want. It doesn't end after you approach and get her attention. You have to keep taking risks to progress the relationship. This is scary because it involves saying and doing things that might offend and even potentially lose her altogether. But as you see, the alternative is just as bad. The relationship just quietly dies of boredom otherwise.

lubwn · 2025-10-22T03:11:31+00:00

Easy, if you are stuck in a safe territory keep in mind and practice following:

Mock them

eg: be a little bit mean but not in a bad way, there is a thin line between being an asshole and being playfully mean.

Assume things about them constantly

Playfully assume and overexaggerate things like:

Their preference in men (say things like: "You look like a type who enjoys men who drink, beat them, don't work etc." - and she follows either by disagreeing / starting an argument [playful!] or agreeing because it might actually be true lol)
Occupation and work ("Let me guess your work... you work as a scientist" [she laughs and asks why you assume that, be creative why but just saying she looks like a smartass would work])
School they study / studied ("I bet you studied in a police academy")
Why they are out there ("You seem to be celebrating someone's birthday today?)
What they eat / drink ("This green drink sure is sour")

Make fun of them

Women are people. Do not put them on pedestal and make fun of them / with them as you would with your bros. Obviously do not fart and make silly jokes but do not tippy-toe just because she is pretty.

Hot and cold approach

Be funny and approachable one day and have a great time and do not write immediately after or show almost no interest for a day after. Keep the girl trying to get your attention and give it to them only after some time. Lovebomb a bit and then again disappear. This leans into bad territory though but it is highly effective.

Those were safe-tactics, now the bad territory but I hardly ever use those:

Dark psychology tricks (which I do not recommend but they are super efective):

Chasing other women in sight of the one you spoke recently

Works in club-setting and only on half the girls (insecure ones actually, and pride ones). You have options, she is just one of the option and she needs to prove her value to you. Half the girls will start chasing you and other half will give up because they have their self-worth.

Undermining their insecurities

If she spent whole evening preparing for the night out and you mock something she obviously put a lot of effort to you will shake her opinion about how pretty she is tonight.

Undermining their perceived value

Some people just blatantly undermine verbally value of a girl in hopes that their value rises in relation to her lowering her value. It is the most vile tactic though used by manipulators.

Double-flippy-compliments

Saying things like "You look better in this dress than in the one you had last time" or "I did not expect you to see that good today". In first compliment she will be thinking about how bad she looked the day before and in the second compliment she will feel ugly because you expected her to be ugly by your words. Both of the compliments are double-edged sword. You said a compliment (positive) and put something negative in there.

All those tactics will stir her emotion and it is all about stirring her emotion.

MeorOtherMe · 2025-10-22T02:45:45+00:00

No such thing. When you don't know a person you are respectable, and courteous. When you build up a rapport you show your emotions.

If you hang with bros, you first met them you must've been nice, or courteous... Now, after some time (rapport) say your lying on the couch, they ask you to do something, you say "fk that i'm chilling" it's no different for a girl.

Nigelthornfruit · 2025-10-22T08:12:39+00:00

Yeah it’s tricky, learn to trust your balls and use them to take risks. Expose yourself to new opportunities (keep them under clothes though) and listen to their voice.

TemperatureNovel7668 · 2025-10-23T13:02:57+00:00

You probably think of things but think "I couldn't say that, that's crazy". Sometimes you need to just say the crazy thing. Did that once and had this 18 year old ask me to come pick her up and fuck her within 10 messages. Was crazy haha. No I'm not giving the script. It has to come naturally.

Dandys3107 · 2025-10-24T10:35:44+00:00

The best way is to do just do something that is opposed to your previous mindset to see what happens. If you read seduction theory but your old mindset still prevails in your interactions, what's the point? Put your ego in your pocket for a while and do things differently, even just for fun. Play a role. Seduction game is not about you being the perfect stranger + sex, you should introduce variety of strong emotions to form a connection and activate sexual sphere, even if getting there would bend some of our social or even rational rules.

Title	How can I stop being goody shoes.
Author	Lazy-Thing9797
Upvotes	8
Comments	12
Date	October 22, 2025 2:24 AM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ocwbb3/how_can_i_stop_being_goody_shoes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-can-i-stop-being-goody-shoes.1564711 https://theredarchive.com/post/1564711

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