How do i stop getting upset over flakes?

Feetsis · 2017-08-01T19:18:43+00:00

22 here, it is annoying, I understand how you're feeling. My personal opinion, act like you don't care, don't dwell or wait on a response from them. If they ghost you mid conversation, just don't respond. You're simply putting the ball in their court, and if they don't reach out again I would forget about them. If they're not interested in speaking or holding a conversation with you, then why waste your time. Yes it's annoying,but something that you will have to deal with since we now live in the era of texting, and social media,also remember text messaging was an alternative for talking over the phone, meaning you didn't have to stop and respond immediately like you do when someone calls you.

Jacob_961 · 2017-08-01T19:32:42+00:00

First of all it's alright to be upset. Don't be upset that you couldn't make the girl agree to meet up with you. You offered, she agreed and then changed her mind and rejected. You can try again or you can say it's not worth it and drop it. There is no reason to be insecure. Ugly girls reject me all the time. Today from Salsa class, I met a 5/10 face and 6/10 Japanese chick. I got a boner while dancing with her, so I asked her out at the end of the class. I went "what are you doing after class?" She said "Nothing. I'm going home." I went "I'm inviting you for dinner if you're interested." She went "Oh. No thanks" and left. Now see the dynamic, she was average at best, she was wearing a skimpy outfit, tight shorts, belly showing, so I said why not? Probably she's single. I offered, she rejected. She is free to have as high of a standard as she wants, I try my luck, I don't lose anything, she wasn't mine to start with and it doesn't diminish me in any way, if anything, I was laughing and enjoying myself throughout, next time she sees me, she's gonna go, why isn't this guy butt hurt that I rejected him, she's gonna try to get validation and I can still play her. But it's a game, I'm not saying I will lay her or that I should have been able to force attraction. Freedom from fucking outcome, there is no clear cut way, you don't need to win every time, you offer you dick to every girl you want to sleep with, some will accept, some won't. It a win or no lose situation. If the girl rejects you, she is the dick, not you. She's the one with no heart, not you so you can always play any situation. Women like drama, she can flake because her pussy told her to flake, she doesn't feel like it. It's not a logical thing. When a guy makes a promise, he keeps it. Women are wishy washy because they can play the idiot card without massive repercussions. Women can go oh I'm so week and fragile without much backlash so they can do whatever they like. You can call her on it and as long as you are not butthurt and it is from a position of strength, she will follow. Cheers.

natephant · 2017-08-01T20:02:50+00:00

Well... flakes are the worst. But I would suggest having several options open, and constantly doing activities that are more semi public, or not specific to a single individual. That way if one person doesn't get back to you, there is someone else who can keep you busy.

Reeeeeacher · 2017-08-01T20:24:33+00:00

AWALT. Why get upset at a woman who flakes if you know that's how they are?

It's on you not to be upset.

Would you be upset if a wolf ate one of your sheep? No. It's what wolves do.

It's on you to do what you can to keep your sheep safe. Will some still get eaten by wolves? Yes.

me_like_bikes · 2017-08-01T22:11:16+00:00

I think it comes back to outcome independence. You only worry about things under your direct control, and spend zero time worrying about things you can't control. And you don't actually worry about things under your control because you take action, making it unnecessary to worry. I think this post explains outcome independence well: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2ruugd/how_to_become_outcome_independent_using_a_stoic/

JLSAAAA · 2017-08-01T22:11:58+00:00

Don't take it personally.

ziondelta · 2017-08-01T23:16:22+00:00

bro you should watch essence of solo he talks about the mindset that many guys fall into which is being fixated on results or in this case the girls number. this kind of mentality is one reason why girls are afraid of talking to strangers. it is dangerous for both sides of the attraction process and ends up in frustration for you and more disappointment for her.

Turawno · 2017-08-01T23:22:17+00:00

how do I receive less flakes

You don't, other than the obvious self improvement. It is entirely her decision, absolutely nothing you can do in the micro scale.

ThePUA_Baddie · 2017-08-02T02:11:28+00:00

get busy and have other leads. before i use to get frustrated with flakes, now not so much. one thing you should do: as soon as you get the number text it right away with your name, usually that yields a reply. at that point the girl is more inclined to keep responding because she's responded once already. only text to set up dates. if girls go radio silent suddenly during text, hit them up 12-24 hrs later. if still being flakey then forget about it. the key is to constantly have more leads. constantly be getting new numbers, new girls. if one flakes then it doesn't matter, because you have another girl lined up

NTSpike · 2017-08-01T22:39:49+00:00

Don't take it personally. I'm sure you've flaked on people constantly throughout your life. She doesn't owe you anything. If anything, assume absolutely nothing when you text girls.

The default is indifference, or simply just a lack of investment to go out of her way to see you. Reward the girls who respond differently.

Title	How do i stop getting upset over flakes?
Author	Seduction_Emperor1
Upvotes	3
Comments	10
Date	August 1, 2017 6:37 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6qya2a/how_do_i_stop_getting_upset_over_flakes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-stop-getting-upset-over-flakes.1431348 https://theredarchive.com/post/1431348

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