How do you be Vulnerable without being needy?

LordofGumbo · 2015-12-12T16:34:38+00:00

Having a sense and set of boundaries + standards. Upholding them too.

noydoc · 2015-12-12T17:10:06+00:00

Being honest.

Approaching the girl within the 3 second rule (lol), saying "hi, I'm accountrel. I saw you when I came in and knew I had to come talk to you" is vulnerable. She can reject you, ignore you, insult you. You're opening yourself up to that, making yourself vulnerable.

If you're needy, you'll spend five, ten, twenty minutes thinking of what to say instead of just being honest. All the while you're sneaking glances (that she definitely notices). You might not even go over, because you don't want the emotional pain of being shot down. You're needy for affection.

What it ends up requiring is being honest in your intentions, and not caring about rejection.

Nook201 · 2015-12-12T20:32:01+00:00

Mark Manson has good articles on this.

ImJustSo · 2015-12-13T01:25:41+00:00

Don't do any action based on insecurity.
Be honest with another person, be honest with yourself, and be honest with the situation you're in.
Read the fuckin room.
Give zero fucks.
Get what you want out of life and harm as few people as possible in the process (Yes, being needy harms other fucking people, because it's entirely selfish while lying to yourself about it.)

rickraus · 2015-12-12T22:36:05+00:00

Outcome Independent.

Coop_the_Poop_Scoop · 2015-12-12T22:42:00+00:00

Watch Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca. Emulate!

GLOOTS_OF_PEACE · 2015-12-13T06:12:33+00:00

Check your intention. Are you sharing yourself with a girl because you just want to, regardless of what she might think, or are you sharing yourself because you want her to react in a certain way?

GJLuke · 2015-12-13T09:05:00+00:00

You be vulnerable for it's own sake, rather than as a tactic to deepen connection.

You be vulnerable because it feels good to be vulnerable and real with others.

Jacob_961 · 2015-12-13T12:28:19+00:00

You have positive expectations. But if ever they are not met, it does not turn you into a butthurt child.

Anal sex is awesome but sometimes you get shit on your dick and that's ok.

fuckusernamesbrah · 2015-12-13T05:25:16+00:00

I think if you just set up the rules of the relationship; and you have to act like you don't give one fuck when you say it. Let her know that you enjoy her company but you aren't into putting labels on things. Tell her you want to treat her like a lady but that you're also a man and she needs to remember that.

TheMinistryOfAwesome · 2015-12-12T17:24:25+00:00

Just read the book again. The only response people usually can and will give to this is the exact thing you'd read in the book.

read below to see I'm correct.

Title	How do you be Vulnerable without being needy?
Author	accountrel
Upvotes	76
Comments	25
Date	December 12, 2015 4:23 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3wj0uu/how_do_you_be_vulnerable_without_being_needy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-be-vulnerable-without-being-needy.1399018 https://theredarchive.com/post/1399018

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